My experience with porn intros is basically limited to the cliche about the pizza delivery guy and multiple viewings of the movie Boogie Nights, but if you want to tell me that most opening set-ups for adult films are more natural and less completely absurd than this Canadian one from what appears to be the ’80s, I’ll believe you (it’s just an intro, so it’s actually safe for work). It starts out with an excellent example of why expository dialog should be banned from all films, even porn, but stay with it because there’s going to be a BIG SNAKE:

My first reaction to this was “that is not a garter snake,” and then I actually looked it up on wikipedia to make sure, because I’m a nerd who doesn’t watch porn.

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Comments (7)
  1. him wrestling on the ground was good enough for me, there’s not even a need for any actual porn anymore after that.

  2. I don’t know, dude. If more porn started out with giant rubber snake wrestling, maybe I wouldn’t be so repulsed by it. And I’m with jetblak22. I don’t even need porn after that raging display of testosterone.

  3. Johne  |   Posted on Apr 29th, 2008 0

    what movie is it from?!

  4. dyb  |   Posted on Apr 29th, 2008 0

    Watching that made me uncomfortable and embarrassed in a way real porn never could. Thanks, Canada!

  5. Forget the snake! Why was that woman smelling the leaves hanging from the tree???

    I know she was from a foreign country but…………………………….

    alien = immigrant


  6. This intro was really fun! HAHAHA! It’s ridiculous and funny but I can’t say these are the qualities needed when it comes to porn films! And the girl is really ugly! One of my friends has another Porn DVD with her ‘performing’ and she’s… an awful actress.

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