Photos
Oh my goodness. Can you believe that it has already been a week (basically) since the 2009 Emmy Awards. CHERISHED MEMORIES! Although, remember when John Cryer won for best supporting actor in a comedy, or whatever? I felt a little bit like a Romanian Vlogger when that happened, if you know what I mean. Ssssssnake! And it’s been TWO weeks since the MTV Video Music Awards, so someone should tell these old grandpas to cool it with the Kanye jokes. But it’s been an OK week. Some new shows premiered. Rich made a new supercut. Terrence Howard provided us all with a few helpful reminders. And we launched a VERY IMPORTANT new feature. (Oh, and welcome back, Matthew Lillard.)
But now it is Friday. So now it is time for your comments. The five best. The single worst. And the Editor’s Choice. All after the jump.
This Week’s Highest Rated Comments
I actually can’t think of anything snarky to say because I think this chick is pretty cool
Posted by: tibmalian in response to A Girl In Romania Hates Kirk Cameron Enough For All Of Us
Score = 40
it’d be fun to hire the horse to sneak into a friend’s room while that friend is sleeping. then, hire him again to visit that same friend at the asylum.
Posted by: whoa! in response to We Should All Be So Lucky As To Find Something In This World That Makes Us Happy, Part Three
Score = 42
Hold up Gabe, I’m happy for you, and I’mma let you finish, b…
::gunshot::
Posted by: Inglorius BasTURD in response to An Open Letter To Celebrities Who Will Not Stop Doing Kanye Jokes
Score = 42
PREROGATIVE
Posted by: eric in response to Kids Narrate Video Games Into Their Own Insane Storylines The Darndest Things
Score = 62
Posted by: monstah in response to Drake Makes Sure To Get His New Music Video Just Right
Score = 63
[Ed. note: no offense to any of the "winners" on this "important" occasion, but this is probably the most lackluster collection of Top Comments we've ever had. That's OK, though. We can't all be the week of July 31, 2009. Besides, you guys picked them. Maybe I just can't see your comment forest for the inexplicably highest rated trees.]
This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment
lololololololololololololololololol!!!!
Posted by: The LOLSTER in response to Hey, What’s Up With Topher Grace?
Score = -23
[Ed. note: duh, of course it's you. You have had your week, goblin. If you pull this stunt again on Monday, you will be BANISHED.]
This Week’s Editor’s Choice
I tried to separate the two voices in his head:
Hello, and welcome, the me- welcome to Sonic and Tails’ adventure… trailer! Sonic and Knuckles had met ever since they were in high school. Knuckles was a bully but sonic used the seven chaos emeralds and knocked him out and knuckles got suspended instead of Sonic, for some reason. So, ever since then, Knuckles has swore revenge and now he will do anything to make him a misery. This is the Adventures of Sonic and Tails!
Adventure.
We already said that! They were out on a morning flight, like they always do. Then Sonic always do, gone Super Sonic but, ever since then, he ever saw, Knuckles had came in and knocked him out and stole the Chaos Emeralds. But there’s one thing he didn’t thought of: maybe they weren’t the Chaos Emeralds. Maybe they were something else! Probably. Maybe they weren’t the Chaos Emeralds after all!
(sorry I had to delay a little bit)
They… they WEREN’T the Chaos Emeralds! But what could he stole? What were those emeralds? Who knows? But this is the Adventure of Sonic and Tails.
I want the extra life so bad.
So, what do YOU think? I guess you have to wait until it comes out.
So, yeah. This, the music was “It’s My Life” from Bon Jovi, my favorite song, we will keep doing this adventure.
Sonic is keep looking for the Chaos, the, the, the whatever it was.
I’m not saying until it’s time!
But, but the Adventures of Sonic and Tails will never end, probably. They will have to find whatever they were, ever, until the very end of TIME! Huh. I just gave you a big, a b- a sneak peek at what it is- they are.
Oh! I just you a BIGGER idea, so yeah!
The Adventures of Sonic and Tails will go on probably forever, of the best friends- of the bestest of best friends will stick together forever. And even sleep together!
(LOL please subscribe) I’m not talking about what YOU thinking of! Hahahhaha they aren’t gay.
WHY would you think Sonic and Tails would be gay?
…BECAUSE THEY ARE!
That’s it! You’re fired, sponsor! I knew that was coming.
(and now the sponcer is now drunk and a filthey hobo and living in a card board box)
So, yeah, that’s what it is.
AND PLUS THEY ARE RACIST!
(gasp) That is it, you’re fired! And I’m gonna sue you! So, yeah. You’re sued! Uh oh, sto-
Posted by: The New Sound in response to Kids Narrate Video Games Into Their Own Insane Storylines The Darndest Things
[Ed. note: obviously, I enjoy this comment mostly because of how much i enjoyed the video. But that doesn't mean that I don't appreciate the work put into this, or the contribution it makes to the world. Bartender, a round of high fives for all of my friends here.]
 |
 |
You Might Also Like
 The New York Magazine Approval Matrix Is OUR Generation’s… |  Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments |  Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments |  Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments |
On one hand, I hope Gabe isn’t bluffing when he says he’ll vanquish you if you continue.
On the other hand, I can’t help but appreciate how you’re switching it up.
To be honest I’m just sitting here wondering how many pictures of web-surfing cats there are on the internet. My guess is: not enough.
dont banish him gabe. he broke the hate-to-love barrier so fast this time. <333
Stop saying he’s fine and switching it up. He’s switched it up like 2 times out of 50. There is absolutely nothing redeamable about this one. I say cut him.
I guess we know who’s playing the Nina Garcia role for the purpose of this film.
The film, I guess, ostensibly being the videogum dramatic adaptation of Project Runway.
Which of you monsters can do a serviceable Tim Gunn?
I can be both encouraging and honest. Also,
(this means I will take you on a date to Red Lobster, but you better not make a scene in front of our friends)
don’t you TEST him, LOLster!
Go to hell. Whether or not you a bring a handbasket is up to you.
WAIT I haven’t been around HERE, but WHO THE fuck is THIS clown?
lololololololololololololololololololololol!!!!!
i’m not underwhelmed. i’m just sort of whelmed.
I think you’ll find many of the winning comments are far more enjoyable in the context of their original posting. Especially #2, which feels like my great-great-great-grandbaby.
Ouch, the one time I got excited because my comment was higher than the 3-7 range which lead to my obsessive and compulsive refreshing to see if anyone upvoted it some more, and that’s the week that Gabe quasi-slams the top comments.
::feelings hurt::
I specifically said no offense.
You’re encouraging us to force the funny, sir. And when you force the funny, you force the unfunny. Like Don says, you need to let us be unproductive so we can be productive. Don knows best.
Also, I read your comment as “You guys really sucked balls this week, and Jesus Christ, I hate everything you fucking write. No offense.” Which is kinda like “Wow, that guy is fucking hot. I bet he’s got a huge, delicious cock and I’d love to find out if that’s actually true. Meaning… I’d like to suck that guys dick. No homo, though.”
and THERE is the luster we were lacking.. … gross?
Thanks for the sexy [and correct] rebuttal! We needed that.
I feel your pain! Especially because I had another comment hit 100 a few weeks back but it was the one week Gabe decided to take a vacation. Hey Gabe, STOP H8IN MY COMMENT AND/OR VACATIONING!!
(I am, of course, kidding. This is a blog comments competition! I will not let it become my dressing up as a horse in the backyard!)
Kanye West, you guys. So hot right now.
You just gave me super epilepsy.
Ehhhhhhhhh.
just loving your avatar so much right now
Hmm, I honestly thought there was a character limit.
also, you guys should go back to letting anybody up or down vote, not just registered users. we get this amazingly visceral sense that the WHOLE WORLD IS WATCHING.
“This is probably the most lackluster collection of Top Comments we’ve ever had.”?Gabe.
In all seriousness, I think two weeks ago beat this week in the lacklustery department, but that’s just me. I thought #2 from this week was hilarious within its context.
Seriously. Lots of Love to the max for #2 (again, in its original context). I couldn’t upvote it fast enough!
It was a team effort though. We set him up the bomb.
Thanks for the love gumshoes. So Gabe didn’t like the comments this week… who cares? Gabe doesn’t like anything. (No offense.) This is the Monster’s Ball. This is our time to shine (or roar or do whatever it is that monsters do.)
I think I’ve got a good idea for Mosnters’ Ball: Post your really good tips that you sent in to Gabe but for whatever reason he totally ignored. Here is one I sent in a coupe weeks ago, I give you The PooTrap…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k
lolololololololololololololololololololol!!!!
Save it.
Aww, really Kenny? I was wanting to join in the Cute Animal Images parade this week!
I want to upvote this gif straight into my pocket where I can keep it all day for when I get sad.
TWSS?
Not unless my boyfriend [Gabe] has a detachable penis! [God, I hope this is true.]
of all the comments so far, this was the one my instincts told me to upvote first? what the hell brain?! detachable penises should not be considered so funny.
I sent this in ages ago. You’ve all probably seen it on your own, but it’s one of my favourite videos.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btV6M2xDe38
That video made me touch myself. Am I bad?
Whenever I see videos like that, it makes me wonder about all the rehearsals that lead up to the filming.
“Goddamnit, Guy. I told you. It’s slide, slide, jazz hands, twirl, jazz hands, twirl, THEN breakdance. What aren’t you getting??”
let’s convince Heidi Pratt to remake this video. that would be so cocoa puffs.
Oh. My. I love the little move she does that I can only describe as “the aggressive funky chicken” in which she always moves from screen right to screen left. Also, what’s up with the random intermittent enormous applause?
And now it’s my favorite, too.
That’s the best thing ever. I am crying right now.
SOMEONE FUCKING MAKE A GIF OF 1:48
I’ve seen this coup d’etat coming for a while now. First it was a move to turn this into gifgum.com and now you want to post all the ideas that Gabe didn’t use? Next week it will be, “And we should write a funny little blurb about each of our rejected ideas.” The week after that it will be, “Who’s Gabe?” You’re playing with fire Kenny and you’re gonna get burned. When you go missing and all the monsters wonder where you went, I’m just going to look to Gabe and say, “Oh my god, you killed Kenny! You bastard!”
Aw geez, thanks, Gabe! I appreciated that kid’s imagination. I was a weird kid too, making up nonsense backstories for things I got overexcited about.
This was a rough week. It seemed like the upvotes were scarce all around. I even got downvoted a couple of times. (Not like I’m impervious to downvotes or something but it doesn’t happen that often!) I may just go ahead and give up my dream of making the Ball.
“It’s so cold in the V, how the fuck do we s’posed to keep peace?” – T-Baby
Have a great weekend yall! I can’t wait to see what Monday brings!
Where did you get that picture of Gabe’s boyfriend? That was a PRIVATE picture taken during a special moment and it’s really inappropriate to put it on the internet. I really expected better from you, Kenny.
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?
I forget what they are called. It’s a weird creature from the sea.
< "img src="http://www.uniquepicturehunter.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/cutelittleanimalsfunnyanimalpicturespichunter-12.jpg">
Don’t go THAT way, NEVER go THAT way!
yo that ferret sells the primo shit but you always have to hang out w/ him and listen to his lame ass widespread panic bootlegs
I am the happiest gumster on this webpage right now.
I really thought I was going to hate this thread. I was so very wrong.
Cute animals with hats parade?
Happy Yom Kippur to all the Jewish monsters. Not sure if Yom Kippur is a happy day, but here’s a cat in a yarmulke.
Summer School!
All I hear is CLAPPING!
Fuck you, penguin.
That is the best thing I have ever seen.
“One dog goes one way, the other dog goes the other way, and this guy’s sayin’, “Whadda ya want from me?’
“Yo monsters, I’m really happy for you, and Imma let you finsihed, but week of July 31st 2009 had the best comments of all time!”
~Gabe
*BANG*
Lame! Why were our pictures deleted? It was art… sort of.
I see someone posted their unused/rejected Videogum tip above. Let’s all do the same. I’ll start. (And pretend not to feel like a jerk if no one else does this).
A story about a kid who refused to GO OFFLINE and STOP MAKING AN ASS OF HIMSELF FOR ALL ETERNITY goes into a rehab center for his internet addiction.
And this trailer for (the surprisingly non-porno) movie Tales from the Catholic Church of Elvis!.
How am I only the 11th viewer of this fine trailer?
Seriously, this trailer is AMAZING. The person who uploaded it keeps taking it down and putting it back up, for whatever reason.
Maybe they get really (and understandably) embarrassed about it and decide to snatch it back from the court of public approval, and then say Whatever… I’m uploading it again, and then the cycle starts all over again.
I’m not signing this if they are going to be talking about tampons.
Heidi’s in!
Oh you guys, this new cute animals trend is doing nothing to keep my repressed Beanie Baby obsession at bay.
P.S. How ironic that the highest voted comment should be a picture-comment that was in response to me. I give up.
LOL it’s Sharon Osbourne you guys. America’s Got Talent!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow, #1? Honored. Beyonce, I’d like to have my moment.
videogum has been lackluster all around this week if you ask me no offense seriously not meant to hurt any feelings just take it easy.
mocking people mocking kanye, something lottery something, … a cougar town recap?
you used to have exploitative yet legal videos of children that i could RELATE to! but i don’t know what a twilight is or what state romania is in. we’re just not clicking anymore and it’s not just because i went off my meds cold turkey.
but still… this is a cold, nasty world we live in. make it warmer.
Why? why?
Haha…without the context of sarcasticmeow’s comment it just looks like the Ball spun you into an existential crisis. Like Garfield Minus Garfield.
I laughed at your comment for like 20 minutes.
But, yeah sometimes the lack of a delete button absolutely kills me. I always realize right after I press the submit button that I fucked something up.
Carrie WHAT THE hell just HAPPENED in here? Jesus. After last WEEK I had some hope, but WE ARE A fucking mess when left TO OUR own devices. Let’s NEVER HAVE A meet and GREAT because OH MAN THAT’D be a shitshow. Did THIS HAPPEN because KENNY WANTED that animal parade LAST week? I must know! WHAT IS this MISSING (not EVOLUTION because we ALL know that IT IS a LIE) link?!
:{{:{:{:{:{{:{:{:{:{:{:{:{:{::::{:{:{:{:{:::{:{::
(read that like llollllolollollololllolloollol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sad_style)> – making monsters’s ball after so long and then getting yelled at by Gabe was not fun. Time for some unisom sleepmelts
Is that a dog snuggie?
This place is more faggy and pretentious than a meeting of a pitchfork’s editors.
Relax, technojeremy
I really don’t understand the vehement hatred people have for pitchfork. Their word isn’t Gospel to me, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’ve gotten dozens of recommendations for what is now some of my favorite music, that I otherwise probably wouldn’t have found anywhere else. As far as I can tell they aren’t influenced by payola or corporate sponsors when it comes to their “faggy and pretentious” opinions.
Also, I’m wondering if maybe you would be open to the possibility that what you are labeling as “faggy and pretentious” on pitchfork is really just what others would call musical literacy. Are they posturing in the hope of making readers feel inferior, and thus feel like they need pitchfork? Are they assuming too much knowledge from their readers? Or are they just people with a high music IQ writing to like-minded people who get blasted by people who resent the time they’ve dedicated to an artform they are passionate about?
I don’t know. I’m not a big fan myself, but I do check out their end of the year lists and occasionally find something pretty to listen to from them, and so feel the need to defend a bit as a return favor. It seems to me that a lot of the hatred comes from the same people who are constantly hating on hipsters. There is a lot wrong with hipsters (and pitchfork), but why spend so much of your time directing negativity toward them? Aren’t they sad enough already? Could it be you are actually very attracted to much of what you propose to despise? People like you remind me of the cliche jock character from all the teen movies who secretly wants to fuck the artsy chick. Go fuck her. She would totally do you. You’ll probably get the clap, but she’ll make up for it by recommending a lot of good music to you.
brightboy, I think you are pretty great. “Go fuck her” is what I’m going to say to myself in the mirror every morning as a sort of pep-talk. I’m also pretty sure that guy has nothing to do with everythingisterrible, so why does his profile link to it?!
Thank you! I’ve been saying this for a long time!
dude, their review of a Jet album consisted entirely of a monkey eating its own poo.
and while that is hilarious and i do not begrudge them for it, it’s pretty pretentious for an acclaimed music review site to not even attempt to engage intellectually with an album, horrible or not. it indicates that to do such a thing is a waste of their time or that it’s beneath them.
additionally, i have read several album reviews (although i couldn’t cite you one offhand, because they were so forgettable) that have been nothing save a narrative about where the reviewer heard an album or how he heard about it. Not even attempting to pair the atmosphere of said location or event with the album. He’s just, y’know, letting us know. Anyway 7.8.
I’m not saying Pitchfork is horrible or anything. They have some quality authors that actually engage with the music. And they’re at the top of the indie news game. But they definitely have some pretentious elements kicking about.
*monkey peeing in his own mouth.
(i am really saddened that i have to write this correction)
Yeah, not that P4k is even in any way relevant to Videogum or this thread, but I agree with you. I have a pretty high tolerance for pretension, and I do respect their opinion in general…while I wouldn’t call their taste impeccable per se, they certainly know more than I do and can articulate why something is good, whereas I am just all “ME LIKE SOUND.” So I leave the intellectual grunt-work up to them. But at the end of the day, using a picture of pugs that says “Sorry :/ ” IN PLACE OF A REVIEW is lazy and rude. So in conclusion, I don’t think Vgum ever comes close to approaching that level of rudeness, because when we post a dog picture that has been altered in microsoft paint, it is in response to celebrity hamsters farting on trampolines. Related note: Can a monkey drinking its own pee be the new “))<>((“? (No? Okay.)
See, that makes me want to read pitchfork like nothing else ever could.
In England we don’t call that sort of thing pretentious, we say it’s clever. Maybe in America there’s so much competition to be the most clever that people just be hatin’ out of jealousy, nucka.
But what if you’re not the cliche jock guy? What if you’re stuck dead in the middle, belonging neither to the dumb right or the haughty left?? Then you’ve got both sets of girls, artsy and barbie, not even remotely interested in you!
Is this like a yogurt cup?
but procreation.. that’s just too complicated
Boy, that reply button sure is tricky!
Great one comments, I laught )))
Boo, typos!
I can’t decided which one of these creatures I relate to more. Nah, it’s the dog. I’m totally the dog. Several times a day I have to look around at the world and think “What the heck did ~I do?!”
Also, I like the feeling of laying on carpet, but when I do that I still like my mouth to rest on something cool like fake wood flooring.
I’ve been upvoting your pictures all afternoon. I ? Cute Animal Images Parade.
Not cute, but mine.
Oh that is so not true, they are adorable.
Voici mon Timbit.
Mine, because I never miss a chance to show off.
Very cute. And is that a Quizno’s bag? Mmmmmm….
…toasty! (sorry)
Fear me chick! Upvoted!
This guy needs love. I’m not lying. Ugly animals are people too.
“I can haz brains?”
Uh oh, Gabe’s friend Jenny apparently said Fuck on SNL, offending the delicate sensibilities of approximately zero SNL fans. Hope she doesn’t get any shit for this!
http://watching-tv.ew.com/2009/09/27/saturday-night-live-f-word-used/
I felt so bad for her after she said it. Poor Jenny.
She seemed kind of nervous overall. But the lip bite and blowing up her cheeks was a priceless reaction.
And, though it was an accident, it’s actually making her more famous faster. So, hooray! It’s just a word!
Whoa, check out this comments section! It’s a cutestravaganza. Contributing:
Are these yours? Adorable!
I wish! I was looking at pictures of pugs today because I saw a few of them out and about today. Half of the people I follow on tumblr seem to own adorable pugs and I’m so jealous of them.
“Kiiiilll meeee”
Also, “lirl.”
“YIIIIIIIKES!” – this kitty
This thread got supercrazy over the weekend. I imagine this is what it’s like inside Kenny’s head all the time.
LIKE I SAID, this shit GOT real. Why can’t WE EVER have a NORMAL ball? WE ALWAYS have to HAVE A goddamned MONSTER mash!
Ha ha, Monster Mash is the perfect way to put it. I’d link to the Mr. Show skit about the crazy necropheliac, who wrote the Monster Mash-like song, but instead
My inexplicable love for the aye aye lemur is better articulated with this. How is this ugly son of a bitch not the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen?
BECAUSE IT looks LIKE THE animal VERSION of this guy.
That was horrifying. If my lemur met that man, he would vomit up his diet of grubs and random plants and say, “Are you serious?” He would then proceed to slap that guy across his child-molesting face for copping his style. Aye-aye lemurs are infamous for that type of behavior. They don’t take kindly to humans copping their style.
DID YOU watch THAT? I am SO FUCKIN sorry. I was sure YOU WOULD recognize IT FROM videogum EARLIER this year AND BAIL ON THAT shit hard once you REALIZED what it was. I GUESS YOU know what THEY SAY about ASSUMING: it’s fucking IRRITATING.
I only watched the one that was posted here. That was enough. By far… that was enough.
BTW, I’m glad you’re back. I think I speak on behalf of every Monster here when I say that I hope you can find the time to stick around. Cheers to you, sir.
Kenny YOUR MY Picture folder MUST BE a never ENDING LABYRINTH OF fucking AWESOME.
I cannot explain how much I love this picture.
Oh holy shit. Best. Thread. EVAR. I fuckin love you guys. Lots of Love, over here.
shut the fuck up stfu
FunnyAnimatedGifs.net
Why? Why?
Well someone had to post one for the accuracy of Golden Girls tits.