So, you may or may not have noticed on Sunday that a child ran up on stage during Jay-Z’s and Alicia Keys’s performance of “Empire State of Mind.” That tiny, tiny creature was Lil Mama. And today, she has (FINALLY) explained exactly what happened in the rush of excitement that is the MTV Video Music Awards (they should be called the MTV Pure Adrenalines, apparently). From MTV:

“I’m sitting in my seat two rows away from the stage, and Jay-Z is walking through this tunnel and just, like, this adrenaline rush is pumping [through me],” Lil Mama explained to MTV News on Tuesday (September 15). “He started [rapping], and Alicia Keys is going, ‘The big lights will inspire you,’ and really, I got emotional. Yeah, New York! Jay! I started to feel him, and I started to feel myself. I just felt the energy, and I got up and started walking to the stage. I was just rooting him on as a champion. Bigging up my borough, bigging up my brother.”

The “America’s Best Dance Crew” judge apologized to Jay-Z and Alicia Keys via a statement on Monday, saying the spirit of the song moved her. She didn’t realize until later that Jay-Z might have been upset by her unplanned move. At the time, she thought they were all vibing with each other, despite the legendary rapper backing away from Lil Mama when she appeared.

Right. She just assumed that everyone would love for her to run up on stage and cross her arms and just, you know VIBE THAT SHIT. What? Has no one at the MTV Video Music Awards ever been out in public before? You know how Henry Darger drew penises on all the little girls in his paintings because he’d never seen female anatomy before? That’s what this is like. Lil Mama is the penis on the stage where no penis should be.

Obviously, Lil Mama knew EXACTLY what she was doing, ah-no-duh. She was trying to get herself some attention because Lipgloss was a million years ago and Avril Lavigne doesn’t even return her phone calls anymore. But to try and pretend like we all recognize the need to bum rush Radio City Music Hall’s mainstage during a performance by Jay-Z, whose appearance was preceded by a PRESIDENTIAL MOTORCADE as if he were THE PRESIDENT because of how you enjoy the way a song sounds is insulting. We are not the ones who took the stupid pills, Lil Mama, you are the one who took the stupid pills. All of them.

“There aren’t any stupid pills left in this bottle. Do you have any extra stupid pills I could have?”
–Lil Mama

In other news: CAN YOU BELIEVE WE ARE STILL TALKING ABOUT THE MTV VIDEO MUSIC AWARDS? I’m happy for you, MTV Video Music Awards, and I’mma let you finish, but the Grammy’s had one of the best live-show interruptions of all time.

Comments (43)
  1. In the realms of the Stupid

  2. Are you saying Kanye didn’t buy an outfit today that costed a lot today? I like the light applause after ODB finishes. Grammy crowd: class act all the way.

  3. she sort of looks like a product of Conan’s old segment on Late Night when they digitally mashed up two celebrities to see what their child would look like… this case, Jay and Alicia’s child = lil mama.

  4. the boys really like it, the girls don’t speak.
    they rolling their eyes, they’re lip gloss’ cheap.

    • She was just rooting him on. As a Champion. By, ya know, jumpin on stage, in front of him. Cuz he’s your champion.

  5. “Lil Mama is the penis on the stage where no penis should be.”

    Was that also Lil Mama in Lady Gaga’s undies?

  6. Who WOULDN’T get drunk if they had to go to the VMAs?

  7. Gabe you may have won the Kanye Interrupts meme race. Nicely done? Shut it down? Or… can we all kill ourselves now?

  8. Wow, from the split second I caught of this performance as I was fast forwarding through it, having DVR’d the VMA montrosity, she really looked like she belonged up there. She and Alisha Keyes could be sisters!

  9. ODB did everything better, including life.

  10. I did the same thing when I saw Neil Young perform “Ohio”.

  11. Does no one remember soy bomb?

  12. woozefa  |   Posted on Sep 16th, 2009 +2

    yeah, this shit is tight, son. you look like a piece of winterfresh.

  13. “There aren’t any stupid pills left in this bottle. Do you have any extra stupid pills I could have?”
    –Lil Mama

    How many more celebrities does Gabe have to fake quote until he gets hit with a slander lawsuit?

  14. Isn’t the MTV Music Video Awards just one living breathing Stupid Pill?

  15. Chadams  |   Posted on Sep 16th, 2009 +4

    I can’t describe how much this pissed me off. I’m classifying Lil’ Mama as “Dead to Me”, as opposed to merely “On Notice”.

  16. HAA! That photo is hilarious. So is the entire ODB video: how the cameraman rolls with it and pans to ODB as if it?s totally scripted, the graphics pop up while he?s speaking, like he is Shawn Colvin, the fact that it was SHAWN COLVIN who got her winner speech interrupted (that?s what you get for that bullshit sunny came home song). Oh man, my day has been made.

  17. Well at least Shawn Colvin didn’t just stand there like a doofus.

  18. “vibe that shit”….i’m going to use that in my everyday vernacular from now on…

  19. Okay, I looked it up cause I was curious after this stunt, Lil Mama is only 19!! I honestly thought she was approaching mid-30s (Shane Sparks and JC Chasez, her co-judges on ABDC, are both in their mid-30s). That said, her staple vocab of “know what I’m sayin” makes WAY more sense now. As does this incident. Cause stupid is as stupid does.

  20. What borough does Smeagol rep again? Oh, quite literally a cave that boroughs into the ground? Then he should have stayed there. But atleast he got his braids did.

  21. Well, this was a good excuse to listen to “Lip Gloss” again under the guise of research for supreme pop-culture blog understanding. “I started to feel [it], and I started to feel myself. I just felt the energy, and I got up and started walking to the stage.” Exactly.

  22. Casey  |   Posted on Sep 16th, 2009 -4

    Look at those three lesbians onstage!

  23. 24 comments into this post and nobody pointed out the Lil Mama exclaimed: “I started to feel him, and I started to feel myself”??? Are we sure she didn’t just run onto the stage to avoid the security guards running at her to stop her from pleasuring herself in a crowd full of people?

  24. Referring to the “why are we still talking about the VMAs” thing, I just overheard CNN: “Breaking news, we HAVE the footage of Obama calling Kanye a ‘jackass.’ STAY TUNED.” All of these people need to get the Stupid Flu (H675309N1) and die.

  25. Lipgloss doesn’t seem to be the only thing she be “poppin”

  26. I think she depleted her stash of stupid pills a while ago and it has everything to do with her being called Lil Mama.

  27. really? really?? is there nothing else going on? But also: ODB, I luvs you too! You rock my shit! And Lil?Mama watch out; Jay-Z looks like he?s gonna eat yo? family.
    -
    no, i have no idea what I’m saying. I am just sure Beyonce and Jay-Z are planning on being elsewhere for the next VMAs.
    Is this going to start a trend? are all the award shows i don’t watch (all of them) going to have jackasses doing their jackassery to the annoyance of the rest of us jackasses?

  28. really? really?? is there nothing else going on? But also: ODB, I luvs you too! You rock my shit! And Lil?Mama watch out; Jay-Z looks like he?s gonna eat yo? family.
    -
    no, i have no idea what I’m saying. I am just sure Beyonce and Jay-Z are planning on being elsewhere for the next VMAs.
    Is this going to start a trend? are all the award shows i don’t watch (all of them) going to have jackasses doing their jackassery to the annoyance of the rest of us jackasses?

  29. In a bizarre warp on life reflecting art reflecting (gunshot), this, Li’l Mama’s proudest moment, looks completely photoshopped in there. FORESHADOWING. It’s like she is epitomizing the poor-choice-turned-overnight-internet-joke.

    Li’l MEME.

  30. Freckles  |   Posted on Sep 16th, 2009 +2

    This is CLASSIC Lil Mama behaviour. For all you haters out there need I remind you that THIS is Lil Mama’s world and we are all just living in it?

  31. Am I the only one who is surprised by the lack of security at these things? I mean, what the fuck if a stalker/crazy person just wanted to bum rush the stage? Are famous people just allowed to do whatever they want?

    Oh yeah, they are.

  32. Don’t you hate it when you and Alicia Keys look forward to performing your latest collaborated work of art, “Empire State of Mind,” in front of the VMA crowd, and you totally rehearsed the poses together and everything, when Lil Mama joins in? Masterpiece ruined!

  33. Ah, the VMAs. “Where dreams are made of.” (???) Just not Li’l Mama’s dreams, apparently…

  34. she thought she was at the source awards

  35. Whats with all the Henry Darger references lately? Its like Dargergum up in here.

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