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You have had a lot of lovers in your life (yuck, you should stop calling them “lovers,” do you realize that everyone hates how you always call them “lovers”?). What most of your friends would say to someone who does not know you is, “Denise doesn’t really have a type, she’s just a people person.” Btw, your name is Denise, and you are a people person. Your philosophy is that everyone is a complex human being with multiple sides to their personality, and it would be unfair to dismiss them before you had a chance to really get to know them (sexually). And you certainly can’t reduce who they are to a single-sentence description, although if you COULD, “I’m a 25-year subscriber to Playboy and New Yorker magazines” would be a pretty good start. (Thanks for the tip, Mark.)
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i’m still looking for my Donna Juanita…
How convenient it seems as though a certain Mr. Delahaye’s footage was left on the cutting room floor for this post.
no fatties.
Don’t worry, I’m not downvoting you, the person, I’m downvoting the overall “no fatties” sentiment.
I LOVE cats!
Seriously though, who is THE goddess?
um…the goddess is “the woman, a woman, any woman, all women”
DUH
This guy seems great, I don’t know what is wrong with girls these days.
Fatties, sure. But hamsters? What is this guy’s problem?
He’s just mad because he’s Jon Favreau.
I tried writing a response to this video like 3 times, and then realized that all of these men are going to hell, and that my words would be powerless to save thier godforsaken souls.
The guy who likes cats is going to hell? Hitler, Mussolini, and a socially awkward guy who likes cats. Perfect.
The guy who has cats was included just because he submitted himself to be on this show in the first place. And he is probably lying about liking cats anyway.
Lowered Expectations
for all your romantic drainage-ditch rendezvous.
To be fair, he only gets the New Yorker for the pictures.
Can’t fault these guys for trying. ABT, u doodz.
Nice socks.
losers. not one of them had any bottles of patron.
Just so everyone knows, a version of whatever this is still exists OnDemand. I watch it for laffs. The video in that link… not a comedy sketch. Fully representative of the clips featured.
I… watch it… for laffs. Yeah that’s it. For laffs.
Just teasing, madame. If you were on Dating On Demand, I would let you be your true and dear self why I’m able to be my own true and dear self.
“*while* I’m able”
There goes my chance to be a little luckier on things.
You got me. The only reason I got cable was to troll for booty calls.
Does that guy (1:00) really refer to himself as “we”? That’s a deal-breaker!
No dogs!
Entirely off-topic but your avatar just very vaguely made me remember that last night I had what may have been a sex dream involving Bob Fossil.
Sorry, I just thought this was something worth sharing with all of you.
That is an understandable sex dream. He has the sweetest moves I’ve ever seen.
I’m pretty sure this is Mr. G:
This fucking guy looks like Nicolas Cage in Raising Arizona.
At least I know my boyfriend will give me a nice watch for my birthday!
why do the 80′s remind me so much of Canada?
Because in Canada it’s still the 80′s. They’re 20 years behind America.
It’s North America’s time machine!!!
HOLY SHIT I am ON HERE! I don’t EVEN remember THIS!
Men are awesome.
Now they’re planning the crime of the century
Well what will it be?
Read all about their schemes and adventuring
It’s well worth the fee
So roll up and see
How they rape the universe
How they’ve gone from bad to worse
Who are these men of lust, greed, and glory?
Rip off the masks and let see
But that’s not right – oh no, what’s the story?
There’s you and there’s me
(That can’t be right)
dude, the Green Day/MTV post was earlier today.
Was “Donna Juanita” code for The Gays back then?
Ach! Back to the loch with you, Nessie!
No fatties, Donna Juanitas, or hamsters?!? Good luck, dude!
aw, man. these are just people hoping to find love. isn’t it nicer to imagine that there is love out there for everyone, even the guy who said ‘no fatties?’
no. especially for the guy who said no “fatties.” The winner here is the candidate with the teal sweatshirt. I might even travel through time for that teal sweatshirt. (and to kill Hitler)
i don’t remember edward norton being in any world war two movies
Saw that , Bill Pullman at 54 sec.
Saving Private Smoochy?
my name’s denise, and i’m a people person
what does “no hamsters” mean? Does he mean no real life rodent-as-pet hamsters? or does he mean no “Richard Gere-ing”? Is hamster some code for women with chubby cheeks who eat their young? I just do not get it.
also: Hello Maurice
I liked it better the first time. I prefer my 5th grader boner jokes with a side of improper spelling and grammar.