STOMP ON THEIR HANDS! Before I get too far ahead of myself: we didn’t do a “How Was Everyone’s Day Today?” post yesterday because I forgot. Uh-oh. I guess you’re going to have to sue me about it? Send it to Heaven c/o MY GRAVE. (Send the sue to Heaven?) Anyway, there is no rule that says we can’t just do one right now during the daytime, so let’s do it. How is your day going? Are you having a nice lunch? Did you get pranked by a Walking Dead advertisement on the street, while you were just trying to get to work or run an errand, that was meant to make you look foolish as if it were anything other than completely appropriate to be scared about a bunch of bloody hands grabbing at your legs from the fucking sewer? Ugh. CALL THE POLICE! Even after I understood that this was an advertisement prank, I’d like to think that in this situation I would still immediately call the police. “Police? A television station is terrorizing and physically violating residents of New York City in order to advertise a mega shitty, ultra stupid zombie show that literally everyone already knows about and hates. You need to come here right now and arrest them or I’m going to do it myself. OVER AND OUT.” F this prank. How is your day going, though? Good? (Via Gothamist.)

Comments (146)
  1. Kelly, I really think you should apply to run Cerealbox.com and Topher, if you are reading this, you should hire Kelly. I visited the blog and the humor is very similar to what VG shows if only more #old. Cerealbox would crush it if it had Topher AND the best blogger in the game right now. It would be a match made in blog heaven and a natural progression of VG.

    Also, they have a suggestion box, I already suggested that they change the “Self-Centered Shit” section to Hey, What’s Up with Topher Grace. You might do the same if you like.

  2. Today has been fine so far, but since this was SUPPOSED to go up yesterday, I’ll talk about yesterday, which was terrible! Work was so busy, and there was a really weird billing error that took me forever to fix, and it snowed like crazy and I was so tired, but then couldn’t sleep. Screw yesterday, basically.

    (Also, sorry to be getting obnoxious about this, but again, just to make sure everyone sees it: vgum.wordpress.com)

  3. I’ve been home sick since yesterday. I don’t WANT to blame it on all this Videogum stuff, but it seems kind of suspicious don’t you think?

  4. My day is going well. Went to the Knicks game last night for free through work and we sat in the company seats, which are super nice and in this VIP club section where they had a huge table of free sushi and other food all night. Last night I had a nightmare but then woke up so today was kind of improved simply by opening my eyes this morning. Tonight I am going to celebrate a friend’s birthday aaaaaaaand right now I am about to have lunch. So, aside from this being the last time we will ever do this on Videogum and I still haven’t completely wrapped my head around The Death of Videogum and am kind of worried that I will be super bummed out next week when it’s gone, today has been a good day for me.

    • Also “today was kind of improved simply by opening my eyes this morning” sounds like an apathetic version of a Chris Traeger quote.

    • John Oliver was at the Knicks game. Did you meet John Oliver?

      • I unfortunately did not, but they put him up on the big screen, after showing a clip of him from Community of all things. If you were wondering whether or not Community would seem awkward and out of place on the jumbotron at a basketball game, the answer is a resounding Yes.

  5. Today is going pretty well. I am wearing a cardigan, which is a thing I do sometimes now. I am meeting an old college friend tonight, which plays into it. Due to the meeting, probably going to have a salad for lunch to get myself in that TIME-TO-IMPRESS mindset. It’s similar a bit to the mentality expressed during the last bit of Gabe Liedman’s stand-up album, but not entirely.

  6. Not great, Bob. Never had a favorite site die before (my parents favorite sites passed away before I was born, also knew some friends’ favorite sites that have closed) but this one is mine and I’m going to miss you all. Not sure what I’m going to do, I don’t really like the layout of cerealprize.com. But in other things, my wife’s pregnant with our second child! I don’t like the idea of raising kids in a world without Videogum but I plan to instill all it’s virtues (farts, dont trust them). I had chicken nuggets for lunch.

  7. working a full week is EXHAUSTING!! and kinda boring?! like i missed the SVU marathon tuesday AND today on USA!!! like ugh all these things you miss being employed. ;( . I am ready for drunk chat tomorrow night though!!!!!!

  8. Kate  |   Posted on Feb 6th +18

    Today I sent Packy his Settlers of Catan socks which were a Christmas gift from Kelly but were back ordered until yesterday!

  9. I’m going to go ahead and open up and tell you that I have a therapist and you’re going to be very surprised. Anyways, I’ve been very busy at work so I didn’t have much therapy but I did talk to her about VG, because sadly that’s the only thing going on in my life until after tax season. It was very weird talking to her about a blog that has helped me as much as VG, specially because it’s not a group help blog but a trampoline injury blog. Long story short, it was a good talk and I really appreciate you guys, from the Scotts, Gabes, Kellys to the Winwoods, Louis Simons, etc.I would name you all but there’s litrally 100s of peeps here whom I truly appreciate and a client is getting suspicious at all my typing when I should be taking care of her. Fan forever fan love yous.

    • It does seem weird to have a website going away be such a big deal but really when you think about it, and I don’t want to speak for anybody else but it’s true for me, it’s like when you realize that you spend way more time with the people you work with than anybody else in your life and since I spend more time interacting with you guys in the comment section when I’m at work than actually conversing with my coworkers, it’s like that x2, plus I actually like all of you guys and I don’t like a lot of my coworkers! And I definitely like Kelly more than my boss! So even though it’s the internet, it’s still been such a big part of my day to day life that there’s going to be a big gaping hole! So what I’m saying is that I will not be surprised if this becomes a topic when I go to therapy tonight so you’re not alone.

      • Um, I had therapy this morning. I was reflecting on this ancient Buddhist tweet: “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else, but you are the one who gets burned.” This was in the context of human relationships, but unbeknownst to my doctor, also related to the end of a certain pop culture blog with which you might be familiar.

        This news was a lot more upsetting for me than I would care to admit. Sure I am not the most active person on here by any means, but I have enjoyed the community aspect throughout the years. And “videogum.com” was pretty much #2 or #3 on my list of sites that I have visited DAILY since the dawn of time. Like, right below “gmail.com” and right above “gwynethpaltrowsfeet.org”.

        I guess I will always have my first and only appearance in the Ball to reflect upon. It was this moment that truly validated my existence, long before Facebook did it with their “Look Back” video. Thank you and good night.

    • Um, did your therapist have any good tips on how to cope with VG going away? Asking for a me.

    • I have a psychologist for my OCD who is awesome. We are close in age and she likes great music and great tv. She is moving, so I only have one appointment left with her.

      Now I have to get a new psychologist and a new blog.

      I have not brought up Videogum during our sessions, but it is odd how often I bring this site up to show someone a funny video or quote one of the commenters. I waste a lot of time on the internet, and this is the best internet community.

    • I don’t have a therapist right now but I think if I did I would talk about actually registering for a site and commenting on it as one of the things that makes me proud of myself (strengths perspective!)

      Also: I don’t know where else to say it and I don’t know how to post gifs so I’m just gonna go ahead and say that I wish as a last hurrah we could all get in a hot tub together, Rachel Dratch and Will Ferrell style

    • It’s kind of odd but I feel bad for you guys? I’m obviously still an internet time-waster, but in the past I’ve gotten seriously invested in some other weird corners of the internet and felt like they were my alternate reality of friends etc. I get it, I really do.

      Happily on videogum I’m a mostly unfunny old dickhead who nobody really likes. I’m fine with that, this is actually progress. Someday you too will be like me, then you will be like “I don’t really have time for the internet” and then, eventually, you will be dead.

      • Don’t feel bad for me for I am already dead. No, seriously, I can’t speak for everyone but I think monsters have a perspective where they can appreciate sometime nice and nerd out while still knowing that at the end of the day it’s still just a blog in the wind. Kahoona Matata

    • Is there a reunion in the works so we can all see each other again?

    • When I was 13-14 I was part of this awesome Harry Potter message board. It actually devolved into talking about everything, because this was during the huge gap between books 3/4. We got kicked off the board when the new book came out and migrated to about 3 other places (at one point there was a hostile takeover of a Spanish Language board). After that it sort of fizzled. I’m still sad about that, that I didn’t keep track of all those awesome people. It was this weird magic moment that happened and then just ended. I keep going back to that with what’s happening now. It’s really hitting me.

  10. What a day already! The CTA was messed up more than usual this morning so I was late to work which was bad because I had to meet with HR first thing to talk about the fact that I’m quitting and they suggested that I might get sued which is not pleasant but also not likely and whatever I don’t even care I just want to get the f out of here! And then I told a couple of people in my department that I’m leaving and they were super sad which was sad but also nice in a way too I guess? And now I have to work for two more weeks and pretend I care and it’s actually kind of busy right now but I’m just like “Whatever!!!” But also I had thought that my shift at my new job was going to be super early in the morning but I just found out that I can actually have the same schedule I have now thank god! I was trying to convince myself that working super early would be ok but I can barely drag myself out of bed every morning as it is.

    On the whole though this day is good because I have been working towards switching to this new job for a couple of months now and I haven’t been able to tell anybody at work about it until today and it is SUCH a relief. I hate keeping secrets!

  11. flanny  |   Posted on Feb 6th +13

    Well, I just check in for my flight to Chicago, and, again, if there are any Chicago Monsters interested in entertaining me in a non-sexual way between the hours of 1 and 5 tomorrow, lemme know. I think we are talking right now about lunch in the Loop somewhere. Any recommendations??
    Also, pretty much everyone who sits around me and everyone who ever tells me what to do is out of the office today, so I am listening to One Direction on Spotify at a pretty high volume. So while on a normal day, all this would mean I’m having a good day, inside I feel like this:

    • I won’t be able to meet you guys, but stay warm and enjoy Chicago!

      • :( But also, who are you?

        • Oh, sorry, I wasn’t actually invited to meet up with anyone, but I did bring up the idea of a Chicago Monster Pizza Party on a different thread the other day.

          Ugh, this is embarrassing. I’ve never actually met any of you in real life, but have seen that some of you go to trivia nights together and what not. I was just trying to join the fun because my real life friends all had babies, and apparently that means they can’t hang out anymore. So, I guess now I’m trying to make internet friends into real friends?

    • I accidentally just took a 2-hour lunch, so something tells me I can’t sneak out tomorrow. I’ll be there in spirit!

      Or you can go to lunch in the west loop and maybe I can say hi.

      • Do you have any suggestions of a place????

        • How many people?

          Haymarket
          Little Goat
          Dragonfly Sushi
          Au Cheval

          Randolph/Halsted is a foodie mecca.

          • I want to go to there.

          • Thanks for the suggestions!! I’ll put this on fb and see what people have to say. And if I get to Chicago and my friend is like, “Let’s leave the apartment for casual drinks” at any point, I’ll put out the call on fb and see if anyone (NABI) is available to meet up.

  12. I have my favorite tie on, so pretty good?

    Also, as treacherous and icy as it is outside, this is way better than yesterday’s oceans of slush. On the way to work yesterday I stepped in a puddle that was a good 6 inches deeper than I expected, so I spent most of the day sitting at my desk with one shoe on while I waited for my shoe and sock to finally dry.

    And I’m currently pretending that this isn’t the penultimate day of Videogum.

    • hotspur  |   Posted on Feb 6th +10

      You wear a tie? I’m wearing a T-shirt. It’s not even a nice one. And I need a haircut and haven’t shaved all week. Still, I look way nicer than I would if I could work from home.

      What am I going to do at work without videogum? Dress better? Oof.

  13. Not too much going on today. Went to the dealership to get my oil changed, and had a subpar experience in the lounge because:

    1) They filter their internet so I couldn’t go to half the websites I frequent
    2) They had generic daytime TV on, where I learned the consequences of holding your pee/poop too long. It \ was followed by an episode of The View.

    I’m back home and made a breakfast burrito to recover from all of that.

  14. I had the worst day yesterday, including a leaky ceiling at home AND at work, and approximately 100,000 pieces of mail missing. It was so stressful that now I’m peeing blood, and I’m getting concerned because it’s way more than the usual amount of blood in my pee. I have a doctor appointment, but I guess NONE OF YOU WILL EVER KNOW THE RESULTS. Way to go out on a cliffhanger, I suppose.

  15. Every Thursday is almost a guarantee to be the best day of my week. I get to take a break from regular work and read to preschoolers who think wearing a tie is the craziest thing in the world. And every other Thursday I host quizzo after work, which is excellent because I’m given a microphone and expected to be a jackass. It’s quite lovely.

    This one’s no exception, except my breath smells like red onion.

  16. My car is dead because it hates cold weather as much as I do so I’m stuck at home. I could be doing productive things like laundry or school work but instead I’ve been napping, watching Y&R, and getting annoyed by people on FB. So, pretty good I guess?

  17. I’m super sleepy and cranky. But also I think George Clooney might be my soul mate, so there is that.

    • Also it is super fucking cold outside. Like in the 10s maybe. And my dog wants to play outside and my hands go numb just walking down the street. I just jacked up the heat in my house to 65 and I’m typing in a hat and gloves. I fucking hate winter. Also Psych got cancelled. This week is stupid and I hate it and I want to go hang out with George Clooney and my dog in warm weather and do silly pranks on people. And also that Vulture article missed about 6 really good pranks so I’m personally offended that stupid blog gets to live and this great blog does not.

      YOU MADE MY HATE LIST, CRO OF SPIN MEDIA. I hope you like weird arbitrary threats of pranks that go nowhere.

  18. my day p much just started. in few minutes i have my end of year review – i know its feb.
    woof. so i feel like saying things out loud makes things real, i cant wait to quit this dumb job. ive been thinking about it for awhile and trying to look for something else and staying on mainly for dr checkups (the benefits are crazy good) but working for a nonprofit is killing my soul and monday was a bad day and yesterday wasnt good either and who knows i might just leave earlier than planned. chchchchanges!
    the rest of my day doesnt look good either but then at the end of it im gonna sneak off early so i can get on a plane and see my nephews until monday!

  19. My day has been pretty relaxed. I teach electives so I have a mix of juniors and seniors, the majority of which are juniors. The juniors are on retreat today and tomorrow, so I had a class of five, five, and currently two. I’ve been letting them watch Netflix, and they have all chosen Law & Order: SVU. Teenagers love fictionalized shows about special victims, you guys. Next period I get to leave early and take my pup to the vet. So that’s what’s going on with me.

  20. I wrote a whole thing about how I was bummed and would miss you and I think SPINMedia ate it, those jags, but I also posted this new Andy Daly podcast which made me slightly less bummed because it’s very funny (to me, maybe you):

    http://www.earwolf.com/episode/the-wit-and-wisdom-of-the-west-with-dalton-wilcox/

    Also, there was a thread on the old posts about twitters and stuffs but maybe we could post more here too, if you guys want. For friendship. My twitter is @Ms_Messica and my tumblr is jessica-messica.

  21. I have friends (nbd) throwing a winter olympics party tomorrow and have been asked to dress up like one of the participating countries. So I’m thinking about that, without much progress. But I know you all will give me the right idea.

    I got my first speeding ticket ever and just called to see how much it is and it is a million dollars. Going on the lam

  22. Hey everyone. I’m going to be gone tomorrow and won’t be able to check the internet but the silver linings cosplaybook is that it’s because I’ll be with my two best friends in the world (not counting mr truck) and they’ll help ease the pain. This means that today is my last day on Videogum and I will make a point to comment later today so that this is not my last comment on Videogum cause that would be too sad.
    As others have said, it feels so weird to be this sad about the end of a website, but it’s true that this place was a sanctuary of sorts for a lot of wonderful people and a few people trying to recommend dating sites! I really love this site. Thank you to all who are involved: editors and commenters most of all. It’s as simple as that: thank you and I love you!
    I know I will see some of you on twitter and other places but in case I don’t I hope you all continue to jump on trampolines without fear. I hope none of you ever trust a fart. But most of all, I hope you all have wonderful lives and fun stories and great adventures filled with lots of fun internet videos.

  23. i keep intending to wake up super early to actually go to class (i am terrible at school), but then the second my alarm goes of i’m like “ehh, why start now?” and then go back to sleep. and then when i wake up again i tell myself that if i’m not going to go to class then i am at least going to work on all the projects i have piling up, but then i just end up playing pokemon (LADIES) and reading videogum all day. and one would think that once videogum goes to blog heaven that might mean that i’ll at least get some work done for once, but, i’m still only about halfway through pokemon x, so it’s liiiike

  24. I called in sick yesterday because I have a head cold, and today I came in but still feel pretty terrible. I’m taking a continuing ed class on making graphic novels and tonight is the second session (6:30 to 9:30 pm way downtown!) and I’m thinking about emailing to tell the teacher I’m sick but it’s also only the second session and everyone else in the class has an arts degree and intimidates me, so I’m worried I’ll just eventually stop going if I don’t push myself now (also who wants to be the person who didn’t show up for the second class)?! On the other hand: I feel terrible. DECISIONS.

  25. Bubbles  |   Posted on Feb 6th +11

    Post snow-day in Albany, NY, everything looks prettier than usual (or ever).

    I got new glasses today!

    I will, however, reiterate that I am already beginning to miss the presence of this website before it has disappeared. After 5 years of commenting, reading, and enjoying, having it be one of the websites I check regularly each morning… to have it evaporate is sad. It’s wrong. I suppose we can’t do much except enjoy the times we had and hope the site gets revived in the future. I hope we can all collectively say “So long, and thanks for all the fish” around 5PM on Friday. I’ll love and miss you all.

  26. gnidrah  |   Posted on Feb 6th +16

    Today I bought the wrong sandwich, I thought it was cheese but it turned out I can’t read and it actually said ‘proscuitto’, which I have an irrational fear of, so I had to leave half of it because mentally I just couldn’t cope with the knowledge of what I was eating. And also I couldn’t pull the offending meat out of it because people were looking and I’m meant to be an adult.

    What I’m saying is, I’m cracking up and VG needs to hang on for a bit longer for me.

  27. pierrot  |   Posted on Feb 6th +13

    It’s my birthday! I’m going to miss you Videogum and all of you monsters tremendously. Tonight I’m going to see Nobunny and I CAN’T WAIT.

  28. heimaey  |   Posted on Feb 6th +16

    Somehow I keep thinking this is not really happening.

  29. I’m still upset about VG.
    My neck and shoulder hurt (probably stress) so the more I think of them, the more it hurts. I just got into it from a supervisor in another branch because I placed an order on someone’s behalf and the supervisor like practically wanted an oath of fidelity from me in blood. I’m about to go to lunch with a friend (the one who introduced me to Videogum) an event which we’ve had to postpone 2 weeks due to cold weather and other things. It will be bittersweet, as I may have to inform her about this blog’s fate. I can’t wait to have a salad with chicken and feta. I can already taste it.

    Today it’s a hungry, sad, ragey day.

  30. I’ve been having a less than great week due to general grad school crises (I don’t understand research, do I even like this, what am I even doing here) so this was NOT a good week for videogum to go away. If Kelly could just postpone this event until I (and everyone else) am in a more emotionally capable place), that would be great, thanks in advance

  31. hotspur  |   Posted on Feb 6th +11

    I just ate a jalapeño bagel and am trying to come to a lunch decision. There’s a food truck outside selling lobster rolls, so it is a science fact that I could have lobster. But I could also save $10 and wait to see what sandwiches are left over after a meeting down the hall ends. I might get tuna on wheat. Not as good as lobster, but it’s always nice to have $10 in your pocket.

    This is the last How Was Your Day, so I should really bring it? But now I’m bummed. I think bummed comes after denial and fear? So I’m right on schedule. Denial, fear, bummed. What will tomorrow bring? I feel the beginning sparks of anger. Maybe I will be angry and alienate you all on our last day as a family! MAYBE THAT WILL BE FOR THE BEST.

    In other news, someone at work who is away from their desk keeps getting calls on their cellphone, which is on their desk and has a ridiculous ringtone that is cranked way, way loud. I’m assuming it’s their mom calling because who calls?

  32. topknot  |   Posted on Feb 6th +12

    I might miss these posts most of all.

  33. I went to lunch for 2 hours and missed this! Damnit. It was an ok lunch, but I did have a really good gin cocktail.

    In life, I am doing the dating thing. And it’s exhausting. How do people go on so many first dates and put effort into online profiles? It’s painful, but also I like one of the dudes. So maybe that will work out? Or maybe it will be terrifying.

  34. artdork  |   Posted on Feb 6th +13

    I’m feeling dreadfully behind with my course work already and am realizing that the “independent” part of “independent study” requires a lot more motivation than I’m used to. Add that to all this VG sadness and I’m pretty much ready to just go to bed and hide for a while. On the plus side, we’re all one step closer to being IRL friends, which is cool. And our contingency plan seems to be going well! Still…

  35. snugle  |   Posted on Feb 6th +11

    I’m a receptionist in a high-volume courthouse, which is a different kind of crazy every minute. Highlights from today: Someone with pneumonia coughed in my face, an unmedicated schizophrenic man accused me of high treason (fancy!), and a defendant with the IQ of a bagel is trying to represent himself. I don’t know how I’m going to survive this place without Videogum.

    Just found out one of my friends died from the flu because this is 1918 I guess. I had to ask for permission to take time off for the funeral because he was only my friend and not a blood or step relative. 3 days bereavement when my [all of the horrible things] stepfather dies. Can I jive dance and binge drink for 72 consecutive hours? I’m certainly going to try.

    Still in shock about this scrumtrulescent website disappearing. I will always cherish Gabe’s disdainful recaps of awful shows, the dangerous levels of adorable radiating from Petting Zoo, and perfect comment GIFs when words were not enough.

    I love you, Videogum. Call me when you get home.

  36. Ugh, my day has been boring but okay so I have nothing to say, but I can’t not participate in the last one! Ugh. I already spilled most of my feels about this horrible death, though I am glad that we are all making efforts to connect with each other in other ways. But… that doesn’t make this okay. Not even remotely.

    Two old favorites (post + comments combined, very high ROI in the LOLK):
    http://www.videogum.com/163521/duh-aficionado-magazine-nicholas-sparks-is-a-jerk-and-an-idiot/duh-aficionado-magazine/
    http://www.videogum.com/453002/quote-of-the-day-mark-wahlberg-would-have-stopped-911/top-stories/

  37. htpo  |   Posted on Feb 6th +6

    I skipped classes today because I was waaay too pooped for that noise.I drove 130 miles to see Phosphorescent last night and I didn’t get to bed until dawn?? But Matt Houck shook my hand and made awkwardly long eye contact with me at the end of the set so its not all bad? and then some delusional old man bought the band like 20 beers, none of which they drank so, I took a bunch of free beer after the show so the exhaustion today was worth it.

    Also this is like the fifth time since 2009 that I’ve commented on here (way to wait until the penultimate day of VG, this guy) but I hope to be more active on the wordpress rather than just creeping in the shadows and silently laughing about how funny you guys all are

  38. I have a headache. I’m drinking hibiscus tea and it’s not helping. I have to work tonight. I don’t want to. Every ten or fifteen minutes I keep coming back to Videogum and just sort of moping around. I hadn’t been coming here very often lately, for the last several months, mainly because I haven’t been drinking and this place is associated in my mind with drunken posting (sorry about that, by the way), but it was reassuring to know that it still existed. I’ve had this recurring headache for more than a month now so I know that it doesn’t have anything to do with the Death of Videogum but it FEELS like it does. IS THIS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE WHEN DOVES CURL UP AND DIE INSIDE YOUR HEAD?

    All those banana shirt pictures really bummed me out.

  39. steph  |   Posted on Feb 7th +5

    I haven’t been around too much lately and no one is going to see this because it’s 2AM but I feel like I have to participate in this thread, you know? Put hand to heart and take a last go.

    So…today I went to my job which is so boring, and then I got dinner with a friend and his new girlfriend, then drinks with another friend visiting from Texas. Then I came home and played Hearthstone for like three hours after my husband went to bed. I’ve been doing this basically every night this week, and I think he’s starting to get mad. I just started reading Selected Stories by Alice Munro (which is excellent) but then left my book at work so I can’t even pretend I was being a lovely little bookworm and reading deep into the night.

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