On The View this morning, Barbara Walters “reviewed” Bruno. SPOILER ALERT: she didn’t like it. She claimed that she did not need to know how people “are doing anal intercourse,” that she had a problem with the “machine that showed you how to have oral sex” (Uh, how does Barbara Walters have oral sex?), and she also postulated that this movie might make some people homophobic who were not homophobic before seeing the movie. Huh. Is that how homophobia works? I’m pretty sure that’s not how homophobia works, but maybe that is how it works now. “I used to be tolerant of other people’s lifestyles, but then I saw a comedy movie, and now I am an active member in a gang of hate crimers.”
I’m not saying that Bruno wasn’t super-problematic and that I’m not still trying to figure out what I thought about it, I’m just saying that Barbara Walters’s criticisms of the movie are dumb, and make her sound old (which, to be fair, she is). “Penises are gross.” Sure, Barbara.
In any case, what’s most important to remember is that one time Barbara Walters interviewed the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as if they were real.
“Why weren’t any of you invited to the Oscars, and I have a follow-up question: I’m a journalist.”
“Barbara, that’s not a question.”
*Dear Barbara, that is not what that machine showed you. Love, your eyes.