More like news BOO-pers! ‘Cause of how people got scared, and also ghosts! Thank you, goodnight! (Via BlameItOn.)

Comments (24)
  1. I’m glad no polar bears were hurt.

  2. I always find it awkward and kind of annoying when the frighteners linger in character. Ya did yr job, congrats, now beat it, it’s over, you get no more attention.

  3. Is the first one on there because it sounds like he says “Have you seen this shit?”

  4. The zombie clips were a total shambles. ZING

  5. is anyone going to be the ice cream baby for halloween

  6. I thoroughly enjoyed the weatherman who threw his mic in the polar bear pool and the follow-up harassing. News anchors! They’re just like us!

  7. Geez, lady at 3:30, Buzzkill McGhee much?

  8. I am kind of stressed out about Halloween candy, you guys. I don’t want to buy gross corporate crap that tastes waxy and flavorless to me and is often related to child labor in South America, but I don’t want to spend $8 on dark chocolate that kids hate. Plus I really dislike the amount of waste that goes into the overpackaging, but I guess that can’t be helped. My cute neighbor kids just learned they’re allergic to dairy and gluten (actually allergic not yuppie allergic), so I’m not really sure what I can give out. Raisins? I DON’T WANT TO BE THE RAISIN HOUSE. Plus Halloween falls on Last Thursday, which means I’ll also get a lot of drunk 20-year-olds wandering in from the street festival. I almost want to bake some things my neighbor kids will like, skip town and go to the beach for a few days. Oh man, but then I’ll probably have to buy candy for beach kids and run into all my same moral candy dilemmas. Organic candy corn? Sigh.

    I’ll make the neighbor kids good treats and then buy dark chocolate for me the parents going through the candy collection.

    • Maybe tiny packages of Pirate’s Booty? Then dress my dog and myself up like Pirates? Make it a theme? I don’t anything like this that would work, and kids probably don’t like lunch sized snack food on a candy holiday.

      Also: where can you get the good pumpkin carving tools that they used to sell in the 90s? The safe serrated blades that weren’t super thin and lasted forever? I only can find super thin, super cheap crappy pumpkin stuff… and I’ve looked at a bunch of places. Ugh.

      • Yummi Earth organic lollipops are the most delicious things on earth, and they’re not crazy expensive. They can be hard to find, though. I order mine (yes, I order lollipops because THEY ARE SERIOUSLY THAT GOOD) online.

      • I found something called a “jabsaw” on Amazon. It looks like it would fit my pumpkin-related and minor sawing needs and probably won’t break 3 minutes into using it. Even Williams & Sonoma has nothing but thin-bladed crap (though I’m sure you could return it if it broke). I should probably not look up knives on my work computer and go to Home Goods or Marshall’s like a goddamn adult.

    • gimme raisins or gimme death

    • Put out an empty bowl with a sign saying “please take just one!” then people will think some asshole person before them took all the candy. Problem solved.

    • Bags of pennies.

  9. Mr. Sparkle and I always wind up buying too much candy and then November is just like a candy explosion in our house. But, we’re doing it for the kids. If it makes youngsters happy, we have to, right?


    (also, awesome for another reason which is the clip was adressed on Opie & Anthony with Louis Ck)

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