In those quiet moments when you sat back and thought about what kind of person you were, and how your interactions with the world shaped not only others’ perceptions of you but your own perception of yourself, you never once thought that you would be the type to pull off something like this. Hell, you never thought that you’d be the type who would ever want to pull off something like this. It seemed completely outside of and separate from the person you thought you were, and not having had the time to consider the repercussions of this act left you feeling a bit dazed. Yet somehow…somehow you knew this wouldn’t be the last time. It felt good — and “good” seemed to mean something unlike what it meant to you in the past. It wasn’t “good” like the chocolate chip cookies your mom mad were “good” when she didn’t put “healthy” stuff in them. It wasn’t “good” like how you felt when you made a basket during gym. It wasn’t “good” like when you got to rearrange the desks in your classroom, and now you got to sit near a friend. No, this was new. You felt strong. You felt contemporary. You felt like you had just yelled “HUMP DAY” like the camel does in that Geico commercial, except you did it at school, and you keep doing it even when it isn’t Wednesday, and now you’re on the news?

You’re telling me that it’s gotten so bad that some kids have even been called into the principal’s office?! I swear to God, Michele Bachmann is right. HUMP DAYYYYYY! (Via Abroath.)

Comments (32)
  1. I wish there were a principle’s office at work where I could send coworkers who say that all day long.

    • Also, now I’m just convinced that the principal’s (not principle’s, duh) office only exists for teachers to be able to get temporary reprieve from the most annoying children sometimes.

    • I work for a pretty awesome place, where everyone is pretty great and chill (but not like “beers in the mini-fridge, dude!” chill, regular chill, like regular, good people) and this one guy used to always be like “I can’t wait to get out of this place” in a super angry tone. I never got that guy. And he was the one that rode his bike to work in full-on brand-splattered spandex bike gear, and wore rainbow toe socks so that his toes would fit into his “business casual” black felt vibram five-fingers.

  2. I find it hard to believe that Kate made carob cookies and tried to pass them off as the real thing.

  3. This happened in the high school in my town, but it was for saying “meep” like Beaker. The principle thought it was a swear. Hilarity ensued.

    • Wow! That’s not even close for getting sent to the principal’s office for talking about Grand FUNK Railway. Happened to Ms. Coolio

  4. This reminds me of the time at lunch in middle school when my friends and I came up with the SUPER clever joke of “What if you were saying ‘What the hell?’ right when Mr. Webber walked by?” (Mr. Webber was the scary disciplinary dean who walked around the cafeteria glaring at the children) and we started chanting “What the hello Mr. Webber!” over and over until suddenly I was the only one saying it and I turned around and Mr. Webber was glaring straight into my eyes. It was very movielike.

    • I got in trouble for drawing my principal in my book and writing “BORIS” over his face. I don’t know why but we thought that was super funny and mean to call him behind his back.

      • My elementary principal was Mrs. Jurkiw, pronounced JERK-you. But we were not creative enough/liked her too much to think to pull that on her.

    • I generally try to repress middle school memories but they’re suddenly flooding back! I had a social studies teacher named Mr. Anderson who used to be a missionary in Venezuela and he would talk about it all the time so of course we mocked him for it constantly. None of the kids really liked him though I can’t really think of a genuine reason for this. Anyway, he showed us a picture of his daughter once and this popular girl named Colleen who was a huge goody-goody teacher’s pet who I of course hated got caught passing a note around the back of the classroom that said “Mr. Anderson’s daughter is so cute! Obviously she doesn’t get her good looks from him” and I have never experienced anything like the collective horror of everybody who knew what it said in that moment. Of course my horror was mixed with a little glee, but still.

      • I had a middle school math teacher who wore a blue dress with white polka dots that looked exactly like the Berenstain Bears mom’s dress. She also looked like the lady who broke the champagne bottle at the beginning of Smashing Pumpkin’s ‘Tonight, Tonight’ music video. My friend once asked her if she was ever in a music video and she didn’t think that was funny. She probably imagined it worse than it was.

        • Also in elementary school I had an art teacher named mrs. tudor (tutor?) and of course we all yelled “MRS TUTOR TEACHES FART!!!” like the tiny geniuses we were.

    • I had a teacher in middle school who I shared mutual resentment with. This was actually a repeated theme in school for me, teachers who were just a little too up-tight resenting me because I was fine with not trying hard at all, getting a B+ or A- and not putting in the effort to be the perfect student they wanted me to be.

      Anyways. We liked to annoy the crap out of each other. He often had gum or mints in class, but would make students throw any they had away. If he did have gum or mints that day, I would often raise my hand and casually ask him if I could have a piece. Not all the time though, I had other reasons to raise my hand just often enough that he had to call on me.

      He, for no apparent reason, showed us Rudy once. The kids who liked him started calling him Rudy because he loves the movie. My friends and I started acting like we were quoting the movie by saying “Rudy’s a spaz” when he walked by us in the hallway.

      My favorite though was when I brought in a twelve-pack of coke, gave them out to students, and on my friend’s cue of “Boy am I thirsty” everyone opened their cans and started drinking.

  5. Maybe they should fuck with them and literally “hump” in the hallway. Just have Wednesdays be big public sex orgy days. Then they can have something to REALLY complain about. WTF people!!?!?!?

  6. Ok I guess I have to do it. HUMP DAAAAAYYYY!!!

    FT, you’re slipping buddy.

  7. As a Minnesotan, I have to pop in and say sorry whenever Michelle Bachmann is mentioned.

    Sorry guys. We are so, so sorry.

  8. The thing that makes me so mad about this is that I’m sure that 95% of the kids who are screaming “HUMP DAY” all the time had never before heard the term “Hump Day” or even know what it means at all.

    It reminds me of when my brother was in middle school and he and his friends kept referring to the “gothlic” kids. My mom and I tried to explain to him that it was “gothic” but he would not believe us! “Everyone at school calls them gothlic! That’s what they’re called!” So, that’s what goth kids were called at my brother’s middle school BY EVERYONE. An entire middle school thinking that “goth” was short for “gothlic.” To this day it still blows my mind and makes me laugh.

    • Maybe these kids wore black kilts and listened to emotive bagpipe music?

    • When my little brother was in early middle school, he got kicked in the groin during PE Class, and came home to tell my mom that his “tentacles” really hurt.

      this is the same brother who genuinely thought that “”cuse me while I kiss the sky” was in fact Jimi Hendrix singing “”cuse me while I kiss this guy.”

      I love my brother. And now that we are older, I am confident he would beat the shit out of me if I shared this golden moments of childhood

      • I once got mad at my younger brother in a McDonald’s drive in. He asked for a hamburger.

        I turned to him in disgust. “It’s called a HANGINBurger.”

        • As a small child, I once vehemently argued that the letter S was in the alphabet twice, “Q,R,S,Y,Z.”

          I also argued with my dad that it was Judas OF Scariot instead of Judas Iscariot.

          Kids are stupid.

          • I argued with my sister because I didn’t think the term Indian giving was offensive, because I believed it referred to the US government signing treaties, protecting land for the Native Americans, then breaking the treaty and kicking them off. Perfect combination of educated and idiot child.

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