From US Weekly: Start thinking of a celebrity couple nickname! Alan Thicke, predicts his son, Robin Thicke, and daughter-in-law, Paula Patton, could be the next Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. … “It’s amazing. It’s a rocket ride,” Alan told Us of Robin’s hit song “Blurred Lines.” “I’m thrilled for him. I’ve always dabbled in music. If I could have grown up to be Robin Thicke, I would have. But I’m glad somebody in the family did.” Alan also told Us that he believes the couple’s success will only continue to soar. He shared, “I told [Robin], ‘You’re a power couple now. If you only adopt a few Ethiopian kids, you’d be the next Brangelina.’”

Alan Thicke: What?
Robin Thicke: Dad!
Alan Thicke: What?!
Robin Thicke: Dad, you just can’t say stuff like that out loud to other people! Especially not to people who write for gossip magazines. Come on, dad, you know that, you’ve been in this business for a long time!
Alan Thicke: Oh, what? I can’t say that I’m proud of my son? I can’t say that I’m excited for his success, and for the success of his beautiful wife?
Robin Thicke: Dad.
Alan Thicke: Son.
Robin Thicke: I mean all that “Brangelina” stuff…the part about adopting “a few Ethiopian kids”?
Alan Thicke: Ooooh, excuse me! Paaardoon me! I guess we can’t acknowledge that certain people adopt kids from Ethiopia now?

Robin Thicke: No, dad, c’–
Alan Thicke: I’m sooo sorry. Maybe it’s just that we can’t say ETHIOPIAN now at all. I didn’t know that I couldn’t say ETHIOPIAN now. I didn’t know ETHIOPIAN was a dirty word, Robin.
Robin Thicke: It’s not, dad, it’s just–
Alan Thicke: It’s just that we have to ignore the fact that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie adopted a few kids from Ethiopia? Oooh, we can’t speak of it? They did, you know! That’s what they did!
Robin Thicke: It’s more of the tone of the overall statement. It seemed a little, I don’t know, crass.
Alan Thicke: Oh, you want to talk about crass?
Robin Thicke: Here we go.
Alan Thicke: You really want to talk about crass?
Robin Thicke: No, dad.
Alan Thicke: Because we could talk about a few things that I see as “crass,” if you’d like to.
Robin Thicke: No thanks, dad. I just wish that you’d be a little more careful when talking to the press, especially when you’re talking about me and my family.
Alan Thicke: Oh, come off it, Robin!
Robin Thicke: Dad!
Alan Thicke: The truth is that if you and Paula adopted a bunch of kids from Ethiopia or one of those other flashy poor places–
Robin Thicke: Dad.
Alan Thicke: –You’d be the next Brangelina! Robina. Paulin.
Robin Thicke: Okay, dad. Just, please don’t say that anymore.
Alan Thicke: Please don’t sing your song anymore! How about that? How about I ask that of you?!
Robin Thicke: Dad! You are acting like a crazy person!
Alan Thicke: AM I, ROBIN?
Robin Thicke: YES, DAD!
Alan Thicke: I’m just trying to say that I love you.
Robin Thicke: Okay, dad. Love you, too. Please don’t say that other stuff anymore.
Alan Thicke: No promises.

Scene. (Via Celebitchy.)

Comments (29)
  1. Celebs! They’re just like us.

  2. DADS! Amirite?!

  3. I honestly thought that all of the jokes about these two being related were just that … jokes. Now that my eyes are open to the truth, I think I might need to sleep with the light on tonight.

  4. Guys, I’ve always thought of Alan Thicke as crass. I have a strong memory of watching some animal trivia game show hosted by Alan Thicke and at one point Alan Thicke said the word “tinkle,” to refer to animal pee, and my brother said, “I can’t believe they let him say that on television.” I now see that my brother was joking, but I still think of Alan Thicke as being a risque, line-crossing comedian. Saying “tinkle” on network tv on a Saturday morning where any child could hear it! My stars!!!

  5. Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up, Alan?
    Alan: My son.
    Teacher: Hm, what do you mean…
    Alan: Rocket ride.

  6. I think Robin will forgive his dad. Even though he often has trouble distinguishing the Blurred Lines between what is or is not acceptable to say, in the end, blood is Thicker than water. These are just some Growing Pains in their relationship.

  7. I wanted to make a joke using the lyrics of Blurred Lines but then I realized that the only lyrics I know are from the drag queen parody version.

  8. What if they adopt Somalian kids? Would they just be regular people?

  9. I wanna see Akon adopt some little white kids, just to fuck with the press.

  10. Anyone else hear Paul F. Tompkins as Alan Thicke on that recent episode of Comedy Bang Bang (with Amy Poehler)? That was a great episode! There was a freestyle rap battle!

    • yes indeed, and that was such a prime cut of CBB.

    • Sometimes I go to start listening to a comedy podcast, and glance down at the running time and wince a little, but then I see that PFT is on it, and I’m like. OK, everything’s gonna be O.K. Ok as in I will pee a little at some point. I love that guy’s impressions, because he focuses so much more on just creating a funny and original character using the original imressionee as simply a jumping off point. PFT Iced Tea, so little like Iced Tea, but PFT Iced Tea is such an endearing guy, I always look forward to him.

      • Agreed, definitely! Also really enjoyed James Adomian’s filthy Tom Leykis impersonation on the episode before with Maria Bamford. At first thought it might be Andy Daly. I need more Andy Daly.

        • You just wrote my five people you meet in heaven. Of course, with them it’s like wishing for more wishes because it turns out to be three people, but all the amazing characters they bring along…

      • YES, any CBB episode with PFT (so many initials!) is guaranteed to make me cry with laughter. Which is really awkward because I listen to CBB while I run, so I’m just the girl laughing and running around the neighborhood like a lunatic. Thanks PFT!

        (Oh, also, any episode of Dead Authors Podcast will also have me doubled over. The PG Wodehouse episode actually almost killed me I think.)

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