Emmys, Emmys, Emmys ooooooh! (Justin Bieber.) It’s Emmys night, and Neil Patrick Harris is backstage getting ready to host. Stars from television sit in their seats hoping that their name will soon be called, if they are nominated for an award. If they are not nominated they’re thinking, “Maybe next year this night will be different for me, but at least I was invited to come to the Emmys. I’m doing well, I need to remember that I’m doing well.” After googling “what time are the Emmys on,” all across the country people are turning on their televisions, or changing the channel over to the channel that the Emmys are on. “Which star will win an award?” they’re thinking. “Will my favorite star win? What will tomorrow be like for me? And the next day, and the day after that? Will the pain life brings ever seem appropriately balanced out by happiness–” Oh, Emmys night, in our greedier moments we wish you’d come more than once a year, but once is already more than we deserve! OH, EMMYS! Do you remember who was nominated? Remind yourself here. Some of our favorite friends! BENNY CUMBS! BREAKY BADDIES! HOUSEY CARDS! JASEY BATEY! ETC.! I can’t wait to see them all lose to Modern Family! Let’s watch, chat together, and shout whenever we see them. Grab a drink, let’s go! #breakingbad #imeanemmys

Comments (486)
  1. HI GUYS LET’S GET THIS PARTY STARTED I ATE PIZZA YESTERDAY.

  2. We need Hawaiian pizza with some Hamm on it

  3. I’m so psyched for the Emmys! ! ! ! ! ! ! Please take this footballs off my CBS now, please!

  4. Hey, this is already bad!

  5. WHAT IS THIS INTRO

  6. WHENS BREAKING BAD ON!?!?

  7. I like that jacket.

  8. Must be awkward to walk on stage after only two people in the audience chuckled once during your intro video.

  9. im so psyched to watch the emmys until breaking bad is on!

  10. No one in this audience likes ANYTHING.

  11. Why is the guy who plays Kenneth so shiny???

  12. #technology

  13. The best part about being on the west coast is that the emmys will be over before i get to see breaking bad

  14. Who wrote this??!!?

  15. This is me so far…

  16. Golden Age of Television, not represented by how it awards itself.

  17. Can there be a countdown clock until Amy Poehler’s category’s bit? That would be helpful.

  18. Jane Lynch’s necklace is GR9.

  19. Jimmy Kimmel is so skinny

  20. JIMMY FALLON CAN YOU SAVE THIS WITH YOUR ADORBS?

  21. CONE DOG. SAVE US.

  22. Is everyone REALLY shiney

  23. Kevin Spacey scares me in a way I can’t really define…

  24. Did Jimmy pick up his cell phone? WAIT

  25. hi guys, i’m at work, so i’m not watching the emmys, but i am still very excited to cha about pizza. i had a thai chicken pizza with peanut sauce the other day and it was pretty good.

  26. HEY, IT’S OUR BEST FRIENDS.

  27. Can Tina and Amy do this for the entire show please?

  28. I also really like Hugh Dancy, so I liked that shot a lot.

  29. Attention Hollywood professionals, please stop hitting your lav mics and dropping the power packs.

  30. Does this count for New Girl too?

  31. YA BURNT MODERN FAMILY

  32. WHOA GREAT FOR MERRIT WEAVER I LOVE HER

  33. The way they’re moving their hands reminds me of Sherlock flipping through his mind palace…sigh…

  34. Tina’s no long sitting next to Amy. :( Will we have no more laughs?

  35. Hooray Tina!

  36. Tina Fey looks great!!

  37. Tina looks so good

  38. the deshanals are wearing the ugliest dresses

  39. YA BURNT MODERN FAMILY!!

  40. Does Zoe look like she’s been crying??

  41. I like how Zooey & Emily are in similar colors. Great work sisters.

  42. My DVR didn’t record anything until just now. What did I miss? Did Tina Fey just win??

  43. “YOU COME FOR THE KING, YOU BEST NOT MISS.” – Modern Family

    “Ok.” – everyone else at the Emmys.

    Wire references, right guys?

  44. ohhhh my girl is crying for tonys win

  45. I really like these art deco dresses. They’re sufficiently fancy for an event such as this.

  46. Hey this is weird. So far I’ve liked all 3 winners so far. Are we sure this is the Emmys?

  47. Guys, what weird uninteresting facts will they say about you when you win your Emmy? They will say I grew up in Michigan and had a cat named Frasier.

  48. Modern Family isn’t winning everything and Tony Hale just gave Florida a shout out! THIS IS SO GREAT.

  49. I love Jonathan Winters. I forgot he died this year. Now I’m sad. :(

  50. Guys, I secretly love Robin Williams. Like A LOT. :( :(

  51. enough robin

  52. Over under that Alec Baldwin beats the crap out of someone?

  53. My roommate moved out of our apartment today so I am watching sitting on the floor in my empty apartment. It kind of looks like I got robbed.

  54. MY PIZZA IS DONE.

  55. Is it just me, or did Target steal Payless’ motto?

  56. Oh my god my sister just texted me to tell me my mom is currently trying to find my Twitter to tweet with me about the Emmys but the whole reason I joined Twitter was so I could post freely on something after she friended me on Facebook :( :( :(

  57. I really love reading these threads, it’s almost like I’m watching as well*

    *I’m watching War Games, it’s great.

  58. This bearded Hamm is really doing it for me.

  59. Why does JLD always seem to win? I like her, but boy howdy, does she always win.

  60. Love her dress. Love the art deco thing going on right now. And Tony Hale in character is GREAT.

  61. Not letting Amy do a bit, guys? I thought you were getting better, The Emmys!

  62. this veep skit is the funniest thing of the night thus far

  63. Does everyone in Hollywood have a cold?

  64. What is wrong with Will Arnett’s skin????

  65. Will, I think we need to skip a day at the tanning salon. Just one day.

  66. Bob Newhart went to the same college as my mom, so we love him. Heey, that’s a pretty good fun fact for when I win the Emmy!!

  67. Wait…did they just skip over guest actor? What just happened??

  68. WHO RUN THE WORLD

  69. Calm down, Gail. You’re trying to hard.

  70. Blurred Lines is sexist or something!!

  71. Holy shit. That red dress. That’s like Jessica Rabbit meets the the red dress lady in the Matrix. I didn’t see who wore it, I was transfixed by her boobs. And I’m straight.

    • It’s hard not to look, honestly!

    • I have been looking at boobs all night! Tina’s. Sophia’s. All the boobs.

      • Rob Reiner’s…

      • I think it’s cool, to be honest. What’s Hendricks wearing?

        I’d so much rather see rad boobs in awesome dresses than bobble head women trying to out skinny each other like in the early 2000s.

        • Christina Hendricks is usually a train wreck but she looks AMAZING tonight. Super flattering black Christian Siriano dress with lace sleeves and cute short curly hair.

          • I think she has a difficult time finding designers that know what to do with her without making her look just like Joan, which is a goddamn travesty. I loved her crazy cleavage in forest green from 4 years ago, but that usually gets the disaster treatment.

          • I agree. It’s a hard proportion to dress for. As a large boobed gal, if something fits up top, it doesn’t fit below and vice versa…it sucks, mainly.

          • Oh believe me, I know her pain. But she’s got the money to at least get things tailored to fit her right for award shows, if not for everyday clothes.

          • But that’s my point. The last time designers did well with that body type, was basically the Mad Men era. So if she doesn’t want to look like she dressed up as Joan for an awards show celebrating her role as Joan, it’s almost impossible to look rad or like a super sexy bride? Even January Jones, who arguably has a very standard shape for now, has trouble looking good for her colors/figure/whatever and being highly distinct from Betty.

    • they were surprisingly bouncy while she was walking out

  72. Jim Parsons is probably a perfectly nice man, but goddamnit.

  73. WOOOO LOYOLA OF CHICAGO ALUMS IN THE HOUSE

  74. Who is this tall handsome man next to newhart?

  75. Matt Damon looks like he’s been crying too! What’s going on backstage??

  76. I hope they kiss

  77. Will Eminem be there?

  78. ugh play a hit

  79. Elton’s jacket makes me miss Rod Roddy.

  80. I can’t believe Elton John is the thing I have to watch right before Breaking Bad

  81. For those watching the Emmys and PVRing Breaking Bad, BB is on for an extra 15 minutes.

  82. It’s sad that people are dead but is it really necessary to have all these individual tributes but then play the “Shut up and leave” music 5 seconds into people’s speeches?

  83. elton john can’t get a piano that sounds better??

  84. Everyone is so shiny and orange tonight! It’s creepy…

  85. If lange doesn’t win ill scream

  86. Laura couldn’t be here tonight she’s filming her intros to Downton Abby

  87. Ya Burnt, Laura Linney…

  88. Two & A Half Men is still a thing?

  89. The worst part about watching anything on CBS is that you have to sit through all the commercials for their terrible shows.

  90. HIMYM peeps!!!

  91. Jason Segel is above this stuff! Or maybe he was at lunch? Who knows?

  92. I like this excessive hosting disorder sketch.

  93. Arsineo Hall is a murderer pervert

  94. WOOT WOOT WOOT WOOT — said while pumping my arm.

  95. Ooh, I forgot about Blair Underwood. Heeeeey.

  96. Apparently the Bears are doing well, if anyone cares….

  97. Ugh Homeland is such a garbage show.

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