Buy more crying! (Via Uproxx.)
After last night’s Breaking Bad, I think crying sells itself. No need for advertisements.
More like Pad Cry.
(P.S. — That bitch who ran me down for the painkillers is in room 312 for a routine checkup. Guess what her bill is going to look like?)
The Asian 24609! Coming soon to a Broadway near you.
♫ Look down! Look down, upon your cable bill! ♫ (Sorry I have these songs in my head after watching the movie for the second time)
Get this woman a salad, stat!
My research shows that he spent probably $20 buying the kid medicine 30 years ago ($21 if you count the vegetable soup). Then the hospital bill was the equivalent of about $25,000, paid for as a result of the long term investment. This calculates to about 27% interest over the 30 year period. Not a bad investment on the surface.
However, if you consider that the money was locked in for those 30 years and forced to only be spent on medical costs at the end of the 30 year period, it becomes less enticing. Also, you have to consider that he was giving away soup, apparently daily, to needy people that probably never became doctors or gave him a return on their investment, and it becomes clear that he probably only got an accrument on average rate with a typical bank.
He would have been much better off putting them money into an IRA with a similar rate of return with a much lower risk, or investing in his business for the purpose of growing into a chain of veggie soup shops. This would have given him the money to pay for medical expenses while also establishing a financially independent future for his hard working daughter (which I’ll point out never went to med school because she was too busy helping her father with his struggling soup kiosk).
What does it say about me that I thought the homeless guy he gave soup to before collapsing was the kid all grown up, still begging (the look of exhaustion and despair on his face when he gave over the soup said it all for me — “I’ve been giving this man soup for 30 years, and it hasn’t helped or changed his life at all”) and when he was in the hospital, I thought he was going to need an organ transplant and the long-haird homeless guy was going to be like, dying or something, and give him all the organs he would need?
I didn’t believe you. I thought, “I don’t always cry at these things and it is probably cheesy.” Cut to approx. 3 mins later when I gasp and start bawling. At work. Because I am a professional.*
* I am actually leaving early today to go see the baby Black Rhino that was born at the zoo. Oh yeah.
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