Friday, Friday, gotta get a new Batman on Friday! Everybody’s looking forward to new Batman! Ben Affleck has been cast to play Batman in Zack Snyder’s Man of Steel sequel, rumored to be titled Batman Vs. Superman. Of the casting, Zack Snyder said in an official release:

“Ben provides an interesting counter-balance to Henry’s Superman. He has the acting chops to create a layered portrayal of a man who is older and wiser than Clark Kent and bears the scars of a seasoned crime fighter, but retain the charm that the world sees in billionaire Bruce Wayne. I can’t wait to work with him.”

Ooooh lala! Of the casting, everyone else says:

“Whaaaaaaaaaaaeeehhhhhhhh-okay!”

NEW BATMAN, Y’ALL! Started from the bottom now we’re here, in Batman’s house!

Comments (102)
  1. We made it to Friday, everybody! We did it!
    High-fiving a million angels!

  2. “Ben Affleck is going to be Batman? He was in the fuckin’ Voyage of the Mimi!”
    -Husbandglue, after learning the big news last night

    • i never realized how badly i need more voyage of the mimi references in my life. that shit is where i learned about phantom pains! remember that girl and her amputated leg?? and then in 6th grade the mimi came and docked in my town and all us girls were going BUCKWILD trying to sit on ben affleck’s bunk. (which is sexy, nautical slang for “bed”).

      • To this day, when anyone is wet and cold, I think about the two guys striping to their briefs and warming the grandpa up in the sleeping bag.

        and tapping the hammer to get the deaf woman’s attention, and the fake copper tube being used as a fuse (bad idea) and the solar still purifying the sea water.

        But mostly the naked dudes and the old man.

  3. All I ask is that the drop vs. from the title. It looks like the marquee for a 1930′s wrestling match.

  4. It’s fine; Snyder was gonna fuck it up anyway. Then when someone does it right, Jon Hamm is still available.

    • yeah, all the geeks on my fb feed were freaking out because Daredevil was terrible and all I could think was “So you’re more worried about the Oscar winner than the guy that makes 2 hour long music videos in slow-motion?”

      • Right? Affleck will probably be middling-to-fine, Snyder is the real clunker here.

        • I think if Affleck had a decent director he would be good, same with Cavill. I just think DC has no idea where it wants to go with its movie franchises so everything is a bit of a mess.

          And really, they’ll Snyder make another movie but still no Wonder Woman. I’m kind of done with DC/WB at this point.

          • Yep. I think they’ve been in such a rush to compete with Marvel that they forgot that the reason the Marvel movies have been so successful is because they’re, y’know, GOOD. (Or at least fun. I’m so tired of “gritty” reboots.)

          • Do we REALLY want a Wonder Woman movie? I’m all for a lady superhero, but there are 3 ways that could go:

            -They stick with the source material, it’s pretty sexist, and everybody gets mad
            -They change it up, make it not so sexist, and the nerds are mad that it’s all different
            -They change it up, it’s still sexist, and then EVERYBODY gets mad.

            Either way, I do not approve. There HAS to be a better ladyhero that they can adapt. Wendy? Kill off Marvin in the first act?

          • Rainicorn, yes. I’d like to see a Batman that makes me smile instead of makes me want to dig a hole int the ground and curl up in the fetal position and then drown myself with my tears.

          • I’m not a big comics guy, but I am kind of excited about the Wonder Woman graphic novel that Grant Morrison has in the works. And maybe this is misguided but I think Quentin Tarantino would make a good Wonder Woman movie. Or maybe Kathryn Bigelow should get in the superhero game, the military would probably give her access to one of their invisible jets.

          • At this point they’ve made every iconic (and a lot of unknown) hero except Wonder Woman. I think if they approached it like they did with Captain America it might be fun, but that’s assuming some intelligent person at DC/WB realizes that not everything has to be dark and gritty.

            And who really cares about pissing off the geeks? The reason Marvel movies have been successful is because they decided to target everyone else along with the geeks. I think a lot of people could get on board with changing some of WW’s origins.

          • I’ve been highly enjoying Brian Azzarello’s and Liff CHiang’s run on Wonder Woman. It’s the only DCnU title I have continued to read and enjoy. It’s taken a new approach to WW, tying her directly to Greek mythology, Finding out she’s actually a bastard child of Zeus, and having to deal with her new, ROYALLY-fucked up extended family of jealous, spiteful, god-children.

            Plus, Fourth World’s Orion from New Gods (KIRBY4LYFE) is in it too.

            I could see them adapting this material pretty successfully if they put the right people on it.

          • *Cliff Chiang’s

      • Snack Zyder is very good at alienating people who love the things that he makes movies of! No real Batman fans (knowing what he did with Watchmen) will think much to see this. So I’m not sure why any true geek would honestly care. Like…this is not going to be good guys, but it’s okay because 1) you already know this is going to be bad so just don’t go see it and 2) it will not affect Batman any more then let’s say a Joel Shumacher or Tim Burton Batman affected the character known as Batman. He’s still going to fight crime! Don’t worry!

        • I will defend Tim Burton Batman to the death, sir!

          • I stand beside you in that defense!

          • I used to think they were okay, those Burton Batmans. But then I rewatched them recently. And they are simply very very not good Batman iterations. The movies look good, and I love Michael Keaton as Batman, but the direction is really not great. I don’t know what happened, I liked Burton growing up, but over the years I’ve noticed his quirks are really kind of cloying and insincere sometimes. I can’t put my finger on why – Beetlejuice and Scissorhands and Pee-Wee are all perfect movies. But some of his other work is so…like it’s quirky for the sake of being quirky while not contributing to the story at all, which is too precious for me to handle.

          • First, let me say that the Burton Batmans still have a place in my heart. That being said, I think Burton’s reputation has so eroded over time that it’s hard to see those films on their own anymore. Burton’s 80s output was different and original. In hindsight, I think we kind of see that Burton only has one bag of tricks, and he keeps using it with diminishing returns.

          • You have my axe, facetaco.

          • Wait? Tim Burton made a Batman film? I didn’t know that. Guys, I don’t watch superhero movies. But I will defend Nightmare Before Christmas to the death.

          • He made 2 batman movies!!

          • Jack Skellington for Batman, The Musical!

          • @specialk Burton co-wrote and produced Nightmare Before Christmas, but he didn’t direct it. Food for thought. Still right up his alley tho, and he does deserve credit, but Henry Selick (James and the Giant Peach, Coraline) deserves the Nightmare love.

    • I’m with you, Facetaco. There was no way hell this was going to be a good movie. Cast whoever you want, Snyder! We’ll still ignore you!

  5. The only way I would be okay with this is if Matt Damon plays Robin. “Listen, Jokah, you frickin quiyah, we’re going to tuhn you into batatoes if you don’t stop this madness” (At this point I would like to point out that I am not really familiar with Matt Damon’s nor Ben Affleck’s speaking voice.)

  6. Not Batman related but oh my god you guys, I had to go to work an hour early this morning and as I stumbled bleary-eyed into my kitchen on my way out, I saw what looked like the desiccated corpse of a centipede in the sink and went to wash it down the drain, but when I started pouring water on it IT STARTED MOVING ITS DEFORMED LEGS AND TRYING TO RUN AWAY. I draw the line at zombie centipedes so I quietly died and am now a ghost. It’s pretty cool.

    • RIP, catweazle. You died the way you lived. (Actually, I don’t know, it just seemed appropriate somehow)

    • whenever I see a house centipede I scream and then start weeping quietly. They really bring out all my emotions.

    • THAT IS SO MAKE-ME-VOMIT AWFUL. But I feel proud that I could restrain my nausea here at my desk. I’m actually saving that for the meeting I will have with my boss this morning. High-tide of the nausea will come when he begins talking again about his “big vision” and how he hopes we can join him in this amazing journey. (read: fast train to nowhere.)

      • Are you named “annalee” after the line of horrifying rat-faced holiday decorations (which I collect)? Or is that your name? Those are obviously the only two options.

        • my mom has those! they are creepy but endearing.

        • Very tempted to say indeed I am a rat-faced holiday decoration. In fact, I AM going to be picturing myself as this decoration as I sit in my meeting. But the truth is that it is my nickname picked up from the song The Weight…… wait for it….. where he says Well Luke my friend, what about young Annalee/ He said, do me a favor boy, won’t you stay and keep Annalee company. Evidently as young rat-faced holiday decoration, I used to tell my mother I needed “company”….

      • Do you work for the CEO of the Church of Scientology?

  7. how do i post pictures dangit!

  8. dang it! someone help gramps start up the tv screen

  9. Uh, Batman wears a mask so it doesn’t even matter who plays him. Idiots.

  10. I have no investment in this movie so whatevs, Ben is fine I guess! But who cares because IT’S FRIDAY!

  11. He’s not the hero we need, but the hero with the most punch-able face.

  12. I don’t see why everyone is so upset that Ben Affleck is the new Batman. I’m just upset there’s another Batman movie.

  13. Ben Stiller wants to do a TV remake of Reality Bites, so there is also THAT to complain about. I hope it is EXACTLY like his fake-MTV show that his character made.

  14. I feel like I’d rather be mad. This is just such an overwhelming choice. I mean, what first comes to mind is that Ben Affleck would make a really fitting Batman as a joke in a Kevin Smith movie.

  15. The internet is going to blow up when they see the new Robin.

  16. guys I am what Joan Callamezzo calls “coming down with the flu” and if Ron Swanson could fill in for me
    as I quietly pass out on the floor that would be great, thanks.

  17. damn, I think I screwed that up…

  18. The best thing about the internet’s HTTP 404 over Affleck is that EVERYONE cares NOW, but when the movie comes out, its greatest challenge will be making ANYONE care about any of the characters in it.

  19. “i’m mister batman!”

    “…we would just say “batman”"

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