A hat shop named Goorin Bros hat shop are the hat makers responsible for Walter White’s “Heisenberg” hat in the popular TV series, Breaking Bad. Well, sure! Someone had to make that hat, it didn’t just fall off of the hat tree. And I suppose one could reasonably expect a hat maker to get pretty excited about the iconic use of their hat in a popular TV series because where else does a hat-maker get “exciting” news? Oh, the industry conferences are great and it’s a blast getting trashed on Long Island Iced Teas at the Marriott bar with the whole gang after the keynote dinner, but this is next level! That being said: should someone tell the Goorin Bros that Walt’s hat in Breaking Bad is not actually cool? Because I am pretty sure his hat in that show is not cool. For one thing, we are talking about the glorification and attempted-fashion-iconography of a notorious, sociopathic drug dealer, which if I was the editor of Fashion Magazine I would let you know was NOT HOT. (When I am the editor of Fashion Magazine, my entire Do’s and Don’t section is dedicated to not dressing like an asshole, because my take on fashion is correct.) But OK, let’s pretend for a second that Walter White wasn’t an off-the-rails monster: at the very least he’s definitely an impotent former-nerd who’s closest approximation of “cool” is dressing like a Divorced Dad at a Singles Mixer at a Knights of Columbus Hall. The first time he appears on screen wearing that hat and sunglasses you are SUPPOSED TO think he looks like a DORK. Again: I totally understand how your hat being on TV is exciting, Goorin Bros, but trying to turn that hat into a must-have item for the discerning man is kind of a bust. “I am the danger”? LOL. Right. “I am the danger, I get my kids on Wednesday nights and every other weekend.” See also THIS. (Via LaughingSquid.)

Comments (16)
  1. I don’t know Gabe, that hat is straight out of the Mr. Cool Disguise playbook.

  2. [MINOR SPOILERS TO FOLLOW!!!!]

    Yeah, I always thought that Walt went a little dorky when he did his heisenberg thing. The whole “say my name” thing was pretty silly. But isn’t that kind of the funny thing about it? That he’s still a nerdy science teacher who didn’t learn how to be a badass so he just puts on a hat and quotes Destiny’s Child?

    • Like when Michael Keaton was the police captain *and* the manager of Bed, Bath & Beyond in The Other Guys and kept quoting TLC?

      I love this movie so much. So much.

      • I just rewatched Multiplicity. It’s like Groundhog Day’s bizarre sequel. Michael Keaton is the best. Best Batman, best everything.

  3. Because I am terrible, I have been to Goorin Bros multiple times with friends. And it isjust as insufferable as you would expect a hat shop in 2013 in Harvard Square to be. Also, I might be bitter because I do not look good in hats, not even hats that aren’t supposed to make you look foolish.

  4. TO BE FAIR, I almost bought a Clockwork Orange bowler hat to wear, like, around but I realized I look stupid in hats cause I have big ears.

    (Twist ending: a week later a vintage bowler came through the second-hand clothing store I worked for and I bought it for $12 instead of $120.)

  5. Also!!! I went to buy some blue rock candy on amazon because I wanted to get ahead of the crowd and not risk its being sold out the week of the premiere. Anyway! Of course amazon recommended a bunch of other breaking bad stuff (even though the rock candy didn’t say anything about breaking bad! it wasn’t the unofficial blue meth candy that Gabe got so mad about awhile ago [sorry Gabe]) like a yellow rubber suit, gas mask, glasses, the whole shebang. Anyway, it just seems like a lot of people are getting their stuff together for their Breaking Bad premiere parties!

  6. Listen, at least he didn’t go around the hood disguised as a bottle of French’s mustard.

  7. one time i was seeing this guy and then he wore a fedora and I stopped seeing him.

  8. Gabe is the one who mocks.

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