Everything about this is perfect. Bringing this suit on Antiques Roadshow is perfect. Setting it next to that painting is perfect. Describing your grand-parents’ basement is perfect. Calling it “White Castles” is perfect. The fact that the appraiser is wearing the same suit as the Colonel Sanders suit you are trying to appraise is perfect. This is why television was invented. Television, also, is perfect.

Comments (26)
  1. I don’t think I could go on TV like this; I’m too much of a chicken.

  2. Imagine sitting next to this guy on a six-hour flight.

  3. When he went into a White Castle you would just see a floating black string tie and eyeglass frames.

  4. Is there Antiques Roadshow: After Hours where we get to hear the rest of the story about the escort the Colonel gave him for the night?

  5. We are a truly bizarre species.

  6. You guys, this is the post where I talk about how I volunteered at Antiques Roadshow last year and it was some of the most fun I’ve ever had in my life. Wes Cowan asked me where the bathroom was!!! Nicho Lowry told me I was the best volunteer they’d ever had and then wrote a note to my mom saying as much!!! And then when it aired I watched it with friends and pointed out my butt when it was on-screen. And my friend was like, “Flanny, that is not your butt. That is a man’s butt.” It was my butt.

  7. Just when Paula Deen’s money gets otherwise tied up…

  8. That sounds so cool. And writing a note to your mom is really nice of them.

  9. I’m surprised they didn’t mention how the suit is made out of mashed potatoes.

  10. “White Castles” is my favorite part. Adding an s to random words is just the best speech quirk. I recently spent a weekend with my mother and grandma in which they both talked about how they needed to go to “Targets” and buy some “swifters” (Swiffers. As if the regular name isn’t silly enough). Of course this is the same grandma that pronounces the word “vinegar” in such a terrible and inappropriate way, that I live in fear of her blurting it out in public.

    • I also like when people shorten things like hamburg. I got to go to walmarts and get 3 lb of hamburg

      • Are you both from NEPA? Cause that’s just how they talk here. Also, there’s a small town called “Dunmore”. When our team played against theirs, everyone chanted “How do you want your hamburg? Dunmore! Dunmore!”

        • Haha! I love that. I am from NC. This speech pattern is a recent development for my mom so I’ve very scientifically concluded that it is age related.

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