“Yeah, I kinda wanna watch this,” said the REAL hero. (Via Abroath.)
This is a whole lot less glamorous than what Baywatch led me to believe. Why isn’t the camera shooting him from the front so I can see his oily pecs get all scratched up from trying to swim on the sandy beach?
Why did they cut there? He was just starting to do a flipper moonwalk through the breakers! Fire that camera person or editor.
“Not now, sweetie. Daddy’s watching a man drown.”
Virginia. That explains a lot. Virginia is basically the Florida of America.
This math checks out.
Dude! Forget the flippers! Run your fat arse out there and get that drowning man!
Or just blow your whistle at him.
“You! No drowning! I said no drowning! Stop!…Dammit.”
This is why training videos shouldn’t involve Dora the Explorer.
I’m so glad he’s there to protect and thrash around Virginia Beach.
Anyone here from Virginia? I spent a weekend in Virginia Beach and it was fun and everyone was nice and it felt like 50% of the cars down there have vanity plates. Are vanity plates free in VA? Do you have to pay a surcharge to NOT have vanity plates? Is VA just super vain?
I lived in Virginia for a while when I was younger. Virginians are EXTREMELY vain. And don’t dare to tell them that Virginia is a state. They’re pretty sure it’s a commonwealth.
It’s a little bit of both. The price of a vanity plate in VA is the lowest (or among the lowest) in the country.
$10/year. This makes Virginia the cutting edge of meme-based license plates. (All your anustarts are already gone…)
I moved to VA last year and the ridiculous abundance of vanity plates was one of the first things I noticed! My favorite one so far: “TO BLAVE.”
The real hero sounds like Danny McBride.
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