After seeing Fast & Furious 6 with some friends, I wondered out loud how a screenplay for a movie like that works, like, do they really describe some of those sequences: And then a tank comes out of the other truck, and Ludacris says, “They’ve got a tank” and now Vin Dieseil is hanging out the window stretching his hand out but he is going to jump across the highway pow pow a gun is fired and the tank is running over everybody! Or does it just say “Stuff Happens” and when they get to the set there are stunt coordinators and fight choreographers who actually put it together. That was my question, to which a friend responded that she had heard a rumor that the script was only 30 pages long when they started shooting the movie (scripts are usually, like, 1,000 pages long or something I am not sure but I think that’s right). All of this is just to say that showbiz is a real mystery and today we have another exciting chapter in this Amazing Story:

Entertainment Weekly reports in their latest print-edition that the storyline for Shailene Woodley’s Mary Jane Watson is now being saved for the third installment of Marc Webb’s “Amazing Spider-Man” franchise. Said Woodely, “Of course I’m bummed. But I am a firm believer in everything happening for a specific reason…Based on the proposed plot, I completely understand the need for holding off on introducing [Mary Jane] until the next film.”

Like, what? How does that even work?! You’ve been shooting a multi-billion dollar movie for MONTHS, and all of a sudden you realize that an entire storyline, which one would assume is intrinsically tied into the other storylines, because that is how storylines work, is just going to be put on ice for awhile? Fascinating stuff. You guys OK? Should I get the smelling salts? You guys are always passing out from excitement over this industry news! Lie down. Relax. Take your time. There is no rush. Drink some water. Eat a cracker. You’re OK now. (Via PopCultureBrain.)

Comments (12)
  1. This is an outrage. Let’s tell these Hollywood bigshots to #LegalizeMaryJane now!

  2. “Of course I’m bummed. But I am a firm believer in everything happening for a specific reason.”

    $$$ is the reason.

  3. The next Fast movie will be even easier to write. It should just be all the characters taking a nap because honestly they deserve it.

  4. But who really wrote the storyline?

  5. Really? Oh, man. I just got used to writing “Shailene Woodley as Mary Jane Watson in Amazing Spider-man 2, Summer 2014” on all my checks.

    • If you think that’s bad, you should see the cross-stitch pattern I was working on! All that work, down the drain. Thanks, Showbiz!

  6. They realized that more people like Emma Stone and so want to wait until the next movie to kill off Gwen (or wait until the end of this movie). I’m just wondering how they’re going to kill her, since her death is basically what happened to MJ in the Tobey Maguire Spiderman, but without the death.

    #nerdalert

  7. Can I sign up twice?

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