Is there anyone out there who can get enough of the news about the upcoming adaptation of Annie, formerly possibly-starring Willow Smith, currently starring Quvenzhane Wallis? Yes? There are a (small) few of you who couldn’t care less, especially considering that names like Justin Timberlake were being thrown around for the role of Daddy Warbucks, not that you don’t like Justin Timberlake, you think he’s fine even if his latest album stunk and he definitely considers himself way more of a comedic actor than he should, it’s just not something you’d be interested in? Uhhhhhh, WELL WHAT ABOUT JAMIE FOXX, THEN? IF HE WERE IN THAT ROLE?! ARE YOU INTERESTED NOW?! From The Hollywood Reporter:

Jamie Foxx is in negotiations to star opposite Quvenzhane Wallis in Annie, the update of the classic comic strip-turned-musical that Sony is making with producers Will Smith and Jay-Z.

Foxx would play a character named Benjamin Stacks, a variation of the Daddy Warbucks personage, who takes in the spunky orphan girl being played by Wallis. (You know he’s rich because his name literally means stacks of $100 bills, aka Benjamins.) The Django Unchained star has received an offer from the studio and sources say his team has begun to negotiate.

#BENJAMINSTACKS! To be honest for one second: I think Jamie Foxx would be more than fine for the role of Benjamin Stacks. To be dishonest for the rest of the post: BUT CAN WE COME UP WITH BETTER NAMES THAN BENJAMIN STACKS FOR THE NEW DADDY WARBUCKS? LET’S TRY!

  • Lotsofmoney Moneybags
  • Cashy Cash
  • Benjamin Billion
  • Daddy Warbuck$$$$$$$$
  • Sir Wealthy
  • Jamie Buxx
  • Big Wallet Full Of Money
  • Mansion McOldmoney
  • Mansion McNewmoney
  • Ronald Trump
  • Letme Helpyou Poorgirl-IHaveMoney
  • Mr. Manypools

Sooooooo gooooooooooooooood! Can you think of any more? I cannot think of any more, so it’s fine if you can’t either.

Comments (32)
  1. Cash Jobs-Hope

  2. I don’t understand this name and I won’t respond to it.

  3. You want to reconsider the new name of a character who is based on the character of “Warbucks” who literally got all of his bucks from World War I?

  4. I actually just googled “Daddy Warbucks net worth” to see if he was worth more than Jamie Foxx. Dude is loaded.

  5. D.D. Bills

  6. DJ Scrooge McTrump

  7. Why be restricted by gender…? Make him Wanda “Igotchu”

  8. Dr. Scrillafinger

  9. Ke$ha M¢Dollarsigns

  10. Even-Though-I-Have-Plenty-Of-Money-On-My-Own Please-Support-My-Kickstarter-To-Raise-This-Orphan-And-Her-Dog

  11. the last one reminds me of the phone commercial where the guy calls collect but squeezes the pertinent information into the “name” portion. “Addababy eetsaboy.” what’s that you say? do I remember important information that pertaine sto MY life from the last decade, hahaha, Oh you mad, mad men, adverTAIN ME!!!!!

  12. Cash Monet

  13. Big Bank Black [<actual rappers name]

  14. Franklin Delano

  15. Todd Has-A-Lot-Of-Money-In-The-Cayman-Islands, esq.

  16. Joey Joe Joe Junior Shabadoo, Esq.

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