Sorry, guys, Ashley Olsen is retiring from acting. I guess when five years have passed since your last movie, which itself was a poorly received, desperate attempt to capitalize on a fading brand, it’s still called retiring. From Star Magazine:

At the ripe old age of 22, Ashley Olsen is retiring… from acting.

One of Hollywood’s most famous twins — who, along with sis Mary-Kate, got her start as a baby on Full House — says her professional focus is going to be on fashion, not acting.

“I’ve been transitioning from acting as a kid to doing something that I’m choosing for myself — to be part of the fashion industry,” she tells VMAN magazine. “That’s what I want for my future. It has nothing to do with my past, nothing to do with anyone else’s agenda. And I followed my heart the whole way.”

Good for her. Because it would be really sad if her professional focus was on acting. In any case, I’m just going to put the screenplay I have been developing for an Ashley Olsen starring vehicle, Sisters And Scarves And Starbucks, in a drawer. It will be there, because it is a real thing and not something stupid that I just made up, if she ever decides to come back. (Please don’t bother ever deciding to come back!) Bye bye!

Comments (16)
  1. Oh man, she has to come back and do your movie.
    Otherwise, who else could you get to replace her?!

  2. ben (waiting for the perfect GIF)  |   Posted on May 18th, 2009 +8

    Oh wow, I got my start as a baby too! Go figure!

  3. porn_guy  |   Posted on May 18th, 2009 +6


  4. I totally thought Full House was a brand of baby food and was being credited for her success [that being her ability to age from a baby to an adult by eating and ageing, SUCCESS etc.]
    Wait, she’s successful for something else?

  5. Carol  |   Posted on May 18th, 2009 +12

    I heart you Gabe but I’m not sure I’d call the Olsen twins a fading brand – even if you make a $100 million dollars selling your crappy clothing line to pre-teens at Walmart instead of Saks or wherever, you’ve still made A HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS, and so i think the Olsen twins get a free pass from the “Where are They Now?” list for a little while. Unless it’s a “Where are They Now?” list where the answer to that question is: “Busy making a HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS” and Donald Trump is also on it.

  6. Ashley is so much hotter.

  7. WHOA nononono. I am not going to let the blogger of the WMOAT let New York MInute just slip by under the radar. Don’t even TELL me you all have not seen Andy Richter in the most offensive, flip, not-at-all-funny playing of an “Oriental” since Mikey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Nobody? Nobody else bought the DVD in the bargain bin and laughed their asses off all the way through it?

  8. Aww jeez, and she was my favourite!

  9. Maybe her focus should be completing college. She should go to FIT, cause I hear they have a really good Business Degree, with an emphasis in Kahdooz.

  10. blah  |   Posted on May 18th, 2009 0

    VMAN Magazine? Whats with the “startling” celebrity revelations of late, coming up in third-tier gossip rags?? what next, Carlton Cuse reveals all things LOST in the next issue of DARNING KIT MONTHLY with CHRISTOPHER LOWELL??

  11. I’m thinking Gilmore Girls with a thunderdome. Anyway, post your screenplay.

  12. Sausage Gut  |   Posted on May 22nd, 2009 0

    Ever notice how you never see all three of them together?

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