Look, Eminem has earned his place in history. Whatever you think of his hate-filled, Weird Al Yankovicly comic rhymes, the fact is that he has made white rappers legitimate* in a way that Snow failed to, despite the hard work that Asher Roth is doing to set white rap back twenty years. And I think we all agree that “Lose Yourself” is a great crossover track with both pop and hip hop appeal, and none of the aggressive misogyny and homophobia that has plagued Eminem’s career (and hip hop in general). But he’s never really recovered from 8 Mile. Once they make a movie about your life (basically) in which you also star, and win an Oscar for the soundtrack, what’s left? You retreat to your
Clinton Oakland Township mansion and get spotted shopping at the local Farmer Jack’s and you get fat and lazy and complacent, to the point where when you finally do make your “triumphant” return everyone just wonders why you seem so fat and lazy and complacent, even if you hired a personal trainer to make sure you don’t look that way anymore. But whatever, do what you got to do. You’ve earned it. Eat your own heart out, literally.
But this new strain of super-horror in your music videos has got 2 stop.
What? Was there a discount on The Number 23 DVDs at Sam’s Club or something? Between this and his Blair Witch Hostel video from last weekend, it’s becoming really clear what he did during his time off (Hint: WE’RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER NETFLIX QUEUE.)
Is Eminem even in this video? At least T-Pain had the courtesy to send an animated GIF when he couldn’t make it. Jerk**.
*Making white rappers legitimate is only important insofar as it legitimizes rap itself in a way that hadn’t been accomplished before. We can argue all day about whether or not the necessity of a white rapper to break cultural barriers for a musical genre that was and is dominated by blacks is in itself is a sad example of the way in which racism continues to infect our culture, but the fact remains that rap is in a better place than it was before Eminem started.
**Eminem is a jerk for not appearing in his own video. Not for writing songs about murdering his ex-wife and hating his mother to death.