Mark Wahlberg and Diddy held a press conference yesterday to announce their new joint business venture: some water. Whoa! Congrats, boys! This is obviously incredible news to everyone in the world because we need water to survive, and what better way to not suffer from major organ failure due to dehydration than by drinking some water from your favorite stars?! From the HollywoodReporter:
“You guys thought we were going to rap today,” joked Wahlberg at the press conference. But alas, there was no rapping from either of the stars-turned-entrepreneurs. Instead, the duo explained how they both became a part of AQUAhydrate, a high performance water containing electrolytes and a higher pH level.
Wahlberg says he discovered the water while training for The Fighter, and began carrying it around with him everywhere. He ran into Combs at a fight event, and Combs asked about the water. They then began to work on a business plan for the product, and brought on Ron Burkle as an investor. Combs and Wahlberg will both oversee business strategy for the product along with CEO John Cochran, formerly President of Fiji Water.
ALAS, THERE WAS NO RAPPING. Oh to have been a fly on the wall at the fight event where Mark Wahlberg and Diddy ran into each other and Diddy asked Mark Wahlberg what kind of water he was drinking! It is so sad how some of the world’s most important and fascinating conversations are lost to the Prince of Persia: Sands of Time. Diddy at least gives us a taste:
“When I tasted this water, I fell in love with this water. It was that simple,” said Combs. “I really do not like the taste of the majority of waters that are on the market. I am just looking for something that makes me feel good and tastes good.”
DIDDY REALLY DOES NOT LIKE THE TASTE OF THE MAJORITY OF WATERS THAT ARE ON THE MARKET!!!!!!
What does that even MEAN?!?!?!?! Like, I can understand if maybe there is a particular brand of water that tastes a little too iron-y or mineral-y for you, so you don’t buy that one. Sure. BUT MOST? Because here’s the thing: if you don’t like the taste of MOST OF THE BOTTLED WATERS that are on the market, it’s not like you are satisfied with tap water, or even Britta at home. I just imagine him constantly taking a sip of water and dramatically spit-taking it out before rinsing his mouth with Ciroc and then firing whoever handed him the tainted water.
In any case, problem solved. I heard Diddy was going to have his house remodeled so that all of the faucets run with AQUAHydrate. This is also important:
Wahlberg mentioned that he has hopes to also work with Combs on a film project in the near future. A reporter asked if they had plans to appear in the upcoming Entourage film together.
“We haven’t gotten the OK from Sean yet, but it’s been my baby so if they want me there, I’d be there,” said Wahlberg.
“I would love to,” said Combs. “But one of the things that’s very important to say is that we don’t abuse our relationship. Chemistry is very important in a relationship. This man inspires me to be a better person.”
OH YEA-AH! First of all, thank you to Zoe Barnes for asking the TOUGH QUESTIONS during that press conference, but also thank you to Diddy for his perfect answer. Chemistry IS very important in a relationship, which is why you don’t abuse it, because of inspiration and being a better person. Now let’s all just relax and wait to see if “we get the OK from Sean” to be there.
STAY AQUAHYDRATED OUT THERE, YOU GUYS!