Remember Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt? They were on The Hills. One of them has a sad plastic face and the other one has a scary troll face? Well they are on a press tour for their season of Celebrity Big Brother, which just ended, and they have something perfect to tell you. From SF Gate, via Celebitchy:

Reality TV stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt frittered away their $10 million fortune because they believed the world would end in 2012.

In 2010, Pratt revealed the couple was broke and on the verge of bankruptcy, and they even gave up their luxury home and moved in with his father to save money.

He has now admitted they deliberately spent all their cash before December 21, 2012 —the day the world was set to end, according to a prophesy based on the Mayan calendar.

He tells Britain’s OK! magazine, “We made and spent at least 10 million dollars. The thing is, we heard that the planet was going to end in 2012. We thought, we have got to spend this money before the asteroid hits.

“Here’s some advice, definitely do not spend your money thinking asteroids are coming. But the world didn’t end.”

PERFECT ADVICE, THANK YOU SPENCER PRATT! Everything about this story is fantastic and it has honestly made me laugh out loud every time I’ve read it, but perhaps the most fantastic thing about it is that it is definitely a lie? Like. The story they decided to tell in order to cover up their frivolous spending and fame miscalculation is not that they just accidentally spent all of their money (and is not just keeping their mouths shut about it and quietly living with Spencer’s dad), but that they ASSUMED THE WORLD WOULD END? “Oh, we would definitely still have millions, or even, like, I don’t know billions probably, if we hadn’t overheard someone talking about how the planet was ending in 2012. It so hard not to believe things like that when you HEAR about them. So we spent most of it by like 2010 and then figured we’d ride it out at my dad’s place.” Hahaha. Ugh. That fake quote is nowhere near as funny as the real quotes. “We thought, we have got to spend this money before the asteroid hits.” WE HAVE GOT TO. #2012 #buttheworlddidntend

Comments (18)
  1. So Spencer is the poor man’s version of Scott Diksic, I presume

    • Yes, they could only afford one year of online shopping for luxurious items such as cars and watches and private planes and boats.

    • Normally there would be a point deduction for misspelling a proper name in the comments section, but since this spelling makes his name read closer to “Dicksuck”, extra points will be awarded.

  2. Are they brother and sister and lovers?

  3. I’m ebbing between schadenfreude and consternation. The wrong things survived the nonpocalypse.

  4. This is a great attitude to have in the face of impending doom. “Honey, I heard the world was ending pretty soon. We need to go ahead and use our Subway points.”

  5. Couldn’t they have put some sort of super-preservative in their botox needles and survived that way?

  6. Why are they both so shiny? And why is he wearing capri pants?

  7. More like Spender Pratt and Heidi…Pricetag. I dunno.

  8. I wish I could have been the one to tell them that the asteroid was coming. I would have also told them that for the low low price of $5 million, I could get them asteroid-proof umbrellas. I would have liked the way that played out better, and I would have been doing them a solid, saving them from the apocalypse and all.

  9. BUT WHAT IF WE REALLY ALL DIED IN THE MAYAN APOCALYPSE AND THIS IS JUST HOW THINGS ARE NOW????

  10. Reasons for your return:
    - item was too big/small
    - item not as expected
    - item arrived damaged
    - wrong/incorrect item
    - ordered by mistake
    - no Mayan apocalypse

  11. ~~ liVe evErY dAy liKe iT’s yOuR laSt ~~

  12. You gotta spend money to make money!

  13. Now that they are dumb AND broke, perhaps it is time to never hear about them again.

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