Quick! How do we change the National Anthem? How many votes do we need? Do we have the votes? Harry Reid, DO WE HAVE THE VOTES?! (Via BuzzFeed.)
I’m just glad he found a word that rhymed with hoeski.
(The word is broski, guys. Of course it is.)
I have more
(90% of them end with Pee)
Hoeski? Is she Polish?
Wow, Bud Light, what were you thinking? Brewski for a hoeski maybe?
Correction: Bud Light Lime, which is probably why she left him.
He’s taken the top shot on several lists which source out the members of the male species who are worthy to be called the world’s sexiest men.
However Bradley Cooper recently made a confession that could see him falling down the rankings. The handsome 38-year-old Hangover star revealed that he frosts his tips.
Luckily the actor explained that he only had the goldening treatment done for his latest role in which he’ll star as America’s hunkiest sweetheart, Zack Ryder.
I just bought three shares of him on the man exchange. When this video gets bigger, I’m going to cash out and use that money to sell short on Tatum. Then I’m going to roll that money over into my Clive Owen fund. Or maybe invest in Clooney. Unsure, need to talk to my broker at Star first.
I guess you could use a hoe as a ski pole, but wouldn’t that be too heavy?
“Fool me once; shame on me. Fool me twice; woo woo woo.”
Just a heads up guys, you can fool Zach as many times as you want. The shame is never on you. And he’ll cry about it.
I watched this on mute, of course, but I have a great new idea for the national flag. Imagine this entire video (alternatively: any frame of this video) flapping in the breeze. Like his open shirt.
“Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, you broke my heart twice, OK I’ll admit I’m bitter.” I FEEL LIKE HE’S TALKING ABOUT ME IN THIS SONG!!!!!!!!
Eww, Girl, Eww
I get that Pro-Wrestling is often used by academics as a paradigm of post-modern entertainment (much like Disneyland) and that the collapse of persona and product distinctions make this a completely excusable if not resplendent piece of meta-cultural critique.
But also shut up with thaaaaaaaaat.
I love how the vocals sound like he recorded them on a portable tape recorder in the 80s in his bedroom with the door closed so his older brother won’t hear him and make fun of him.
I think he filmed that elevator scene inside the West Hollywood Target parking garage, which is actually kind of perfect.
Yeah, either that or the neighboring Best Buy.
Needs more auto-tune.
Also, I think it’s about time for that hoeski to delete the shirtless image of Zack holding his championship belt from her iPhone contact info.
You know what they say, fool me once, strike one, but fool me twice… strike three.
Needs more Blu e-cigs.
I think my favorite second is 2:04, when his masculinity has finally taken all the hits it can withstand in the form of elaborate hair care, extensive wardrobe finagling, photo shoots at multiple locations, singing, dancing, chatting on the phone, lite beer, and makeup applied to both his face and chest, so he threatens to punch the makeup guy who goes in for a touchup.
“MY LIPSTICK IS PERFECT YOU FAIRY LET’S JUST SHOOT THIS.”
I’d just like to say I love talking interludes in songs. No better way to dramatically convey your emotions.
I’m getting some kind of glitch wherein on the main page I see a video of a baby falling asleep to someone playing or just holding a guitar, and then when I click on the article its this awful music video! Don’t entice me with a video of a baby falling asleep to their Dad or kidnapper or whoever maybe playing or singing to them (I don’t have my volume on okay?) and then pull the old switcheroo with some terrible guy walking on the beach!
For the record, the baby video plays if I don’t click the title and instead click the play button, and it was amazing. I think this guy should make that his music video instead.
Oh NOW my Videogum page resets! Apparently my computer was causing the articles to mush together.
Regardless, I’m still starting the petition to have the sleeping baby replace or maybe jsut be the next Zack Ryder music video.
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