Hey! How was everyone’s day today? You know, even if your day wasn’t all that you hoped it turned out to be, like maybe you were expecting something in the mail that hasn’t arrived yet, or maybe you had a plan for this evening that you were really looking forward to that fell through at the last second in a way that’s totally reasonable so you can’t even get mad about it but you’re definitely disappointed, you should at least be glad that you don’t have salmonella, because that would be terrible. Just ask Martha Stewart! (From Page Six):

Martha Stewart was stricken with salmonella after handling too many Thanksgiving turkeys. The domestic diva told us while shopping for art at Art Basel Miami that she came down with the infection late last month, forcing her to cancel a series of appearances and meetings. While perusing paintings at Lehmann Maupin gallery’s booth — and taking photos of some well-dressed buyers for her blog — Stewart told Page Six: “I never get sick, but I came down with salmonella. I think I caught it because I was handling so many turkeys around Thanksgiving. I was on the ‘Today’ show, I did a number of other [Thanksgiving] appearances. It really hit me hard and I was in bed for days. It was terrible.” But a now-healthy Stewart added there was a bonus: “I lost some weight, though.”

Oh jeez, congratulations on losing all that weight, Martha Stewart, although I bet you wish you had just lost it through a combination of diet and exercise LOLOLOLOLOL. Health really is the most important thing, you guys, and sometimes we forget that until we are reminded, and often by then it is too late. Let’s enjoy these bodies while they still work! Smoke them while you got them! (What?) Incidentally, my day was fine. I ate a salad for lunch, and I watched the Quickfire Challenge from last night’s Top Chef. I haven’t seen the Elimination Challenge, but my friend Max, who is recapping that show for Eater and you should go read his recaps, described the second half of the episode as “The Dark Knight Rises of Top Chef.” Yikes! Can’t hardly wait! Project X! But enough about me, how are YOU?!

Comments (146)
  1. I am eating a delicious tuna melt that I made with garic and dijon, and tomorrow I am going to ask out my crush. It’s a strange mix of fancy adult stuff and squirmy teenage stuff, I guess.

  2. My day(s) have been great!. I’m a newlywed, we have our apartment all situated, and tonight I will make veggie burgers with sauteed mushrooms and watch TV with my wife. Took 32 years, but I’m finally happy.

    • i gotta say, i do much of the same…and reading this i was thinking “man that sounds nice…oh. i have that, too.” yet i continue to wallow. it’s nice being reminded of how good you have it. thanks.

  3. Today’s been good! And it’s my birthday on Sunday, so I’m excited for that! Especially since there is a chance for snow, and it has been so warm lately…

  4. I took an applied thermodynamics and fluids exam this morning and did terrible, but I’m up and “walking” for the first time in five weeks.

  5. I ate breakfast, and lunch, and did NOT get salmonella. So I did not lose any weight.

    So terrible.

  6. I give today a B so far. For the last month or so there has been road work happening on a street I have to walk on for a fair stretch to get to work and it’s driving me NUTS. Every day is full of surprises. One day maybe a whole chunk of the sidewalk will be blocked off, so that crossing the street is my only option, and just as I start to cross a giant forklift will decide to try to run me over. Another day, there might be a slab of metal perched precariously over a giant hole and I have to hope that it’s a safe enough bridge to walk across. But this morning I had had enough and found a longer but less perilous route.

    Work has not been busy at all today, so my coworkers and I had some fun talking about what we would do if we actually had ants in our pants (the consensus was remove them and set them on fire) and making up song lyrics inspired by poorly-written emails from PR people. So that has been fun, but the day has felt super long.

    • I have actually had ant is my pants before. There was a rainstorm while I was visiting a friend, and somehow the rain forced the ants out of the ground and into my car which I had parked way too close to the curb, and they attacked me as I was driving off. I dunno, I have really bad luck with ants. Anyway, that’s basically how I solved it. Ran to my friend’s house, took pants of in the shower and threw them in the dryer to kill any remaining ants.

      • When I was a kid I stepped in a fire ant hill (fire ants, if you don’t know, are ants in Texas and the southeast that are SUPER SHITTY), and the fire ants swarmed up my leg, biting me like a gazillion pac-mans, but I was at a park and also at the park was my first grade square dance partner, and I felt it was wrong to take my pants off in front of her.
        It was kind of my Kobayashi Maru

  7. I ate at a PF Chang’s for the first time today. It was entirely edible and pretty decent, but overall exactly what I expect from a restaurant attached to a suburban mall. I was in the suburbs for a few hours and it made me anxious. I do not like suburbs, there are too many car dealerships and malls.

    Tonight I am going to sit on my bum and do very little. hurray.

  8. Today has been uneventful so far. I’m reading Raymond Carver for the first time, about halfway through What We Talk About When We Talk About Love. I suspect that he’s overpraised for writing sentences like, “‘Everything’s fine,’ I said, which was not the truth,” but I’m liking the collection more and more with each story. I finished May We Be Forgiven yesterday, which, JEB! I called you out last week too – did you like it? I liked it, I think a lot. Call me!

    In actual life news, I held Duke’s ears this morning while he puked. I had instant noodles for lunch, made gourmet by the addition of one egg.

    • (Duke is my dog. If you don’t hold your basset hound’s ears while he pukes, his ears fall right in the puke.)

    • I am really bored so I drew a beautiful and, let’s face it, probably pretty spot-on picture of this.

      It was only after I finished that I realized this is maybe creepy, but I’m not sorry.

    • I attempted to read that book in high school and was very turned off. I’ve been thinking of trying again. I need to read more books.

    • There is this fascinating thing about Carver, in that his editor Gordon Lish is VERY MUCH the reason he’s regarded as a sparse super minimalist. Lish cut the total word count in those stories by 40% to 70% ! And then the “restored” version was released a couple years ago so depending on how much of a project you want to make it, reading the alternate versions could be interesting. Here is one of the one million articles about the whole thing.

      http://www.themillions.com/2010/02/its-all-right-to-cry-restoring-raymond-carvers-voice.html

      Also I don’t have a dog, but I love bassets. There is a fun “benched’ dog show in Chicago coming up in February. This means you can wander around “backstage” and meet all the great dogs. I live vicariously through other people’s dogs a little bit.

      • Wow, thanks for that tidbit. I finished the collection last night and ended up liking it a lot. That is really fascinating, and it raises a lot of interesting questions about authorship that could sustain a class discussion for a good couple of hours. Thanks mordonez!

        And bassets love you! My dog does, anyway. He loves everybody.

    • I enjoyed MWBF, but it’s not the best AM Homes (Music for Torching). Still, it had so many great oddities, like the kidnapper children or the anonymous sex partners. The part that taxed me a bit was the way the extended family kept growing toward the end of the book and became overloaded with do-gooding. By the time the old folks moved in I was ready for that plot line to go away. Still, it’s interesting to read something with a relatively happy ending.

      As for WWTAWWTAL, I think it holds up well. Carver suffers from how widely he’s been imitated, but I think he still feels really original and fresh. I recommend reading What We Talk About When We Talk About Anne Frank by Nathan Eglander. He uses the title story to channel Raymond Carver, only with secular and orthodox Jews arguing about Israel and getting stoned. So great.

      • MWBF was my first A.M. Homes. I have The End of Alice on my shelf, but I’ll check out Music for Torching too! The thing I didn’t love about MWBF was the unrelentless plot parade. It was never boring, but sometimes I wanted Harry to step back a bit and deal with the fallout instead of participating in a takedown of an international arms dealer in an experimental prison. Like, I’m sure this was intentional, but did he never think about his ex-wife after living with her for 20+ years? Never ever ever? Other than that, though, I thought it was fun, and certainly never boring.

        I liked WWTAWWTAL a lot, and thought it picked up steam after the first few stories. I’ll check out that Nathan Eglander book. I’ve heard of it before, and I’m not sure why.

        THANKS FOR CALLING ME BACK JEB.

  9. Today, I had to confront head-on that I have a serious case of adult onset ADD. You’d think working from home in your pajamas with unlimited access to all the jewels the internet has to offer would keep you focused on the boring work you hate, but let me tell you right now, it does not.

    On the plus side, I ordered some delicious fritters from the Indian restaurant and they sent me a BAG of them. So, there’s that.

  10. Was at a lunch with a client today. The in-house radio started playing “Honesty” by Billy Joel. There was a guy at the bar who was well in the bag, who started singing a long in that kind of choked-up, pre-cry voice that people get when they are half-in-the-bag and full of despair.

    Anyway, about the time the chorus comes around the second time, he is full on belting out the song and sort of sobbing, with his eyes closed and without a care that everyone in the restaurant is looking at him, but pretending not to.

    At this point, he flails his arm and spills red wine on his lap, then fully breaks down into sobs. A manager comes over, and quells the situation as best as possible, gets him into a back room and away from the paying customers and I believe may have called the police/hospital/authorities.

    TL;DR — Had a free lunch today.

  11. i kind of know how Martha feels. last week’s cough turned out to be my second bout with pneumonia in 10 months. probably hurt that i drank my way through the weekend [weddings....]

    anyway. lucky that this one was walking pneumonia and not like the last one [bed-ridden for 2 weeks]. literally counting the days left i have at this job. and then i have a much needed 3 weeks before the next one starts to get my life in order.

    it is a constant struggle to keep up with all BS that is expected of being a functional, responsible adult while fitting in time for everything that we want to do. its a tough balancing act but necessary to do right while staying sane.

  12. 1. What’s your favorite Eddie Murphy movie? Nothing late 90s or later, please.
    2. Who was better, Vanity 6, Apollonia 6 or Sheila D?
    3. Excited about the new Eels Album. Check Stereogum out for their new single
    4. I’ve quit redbull and have gotten into coffee.
    5. Last regular season week for Monsters Fantasy Football West. Briadu, Gabs and I are in. It’s a battle for the last playoff spot between Just Desserts, Philplusbert, West and Electric Koala.
    6. Payton Manning is a shoe-in for NFL comeback player of the year, if I remember correctly he got steam cell stuff done on his neck, someone with better smarts should research this.
    7. Got Wild Beasts’ Smother vinyl on the mail yesterday. A+
    8. Buffalo chicken sandwich
    9. What thread was your first Videogum comment on?
    10. What did you eat today?

    • 1. Trading Places. there is no other correct answer.
      2. n/a
      3. haven’t heard much from the Eels in a while. thanks. today I’ve been absorbing the new Crooked Fingers
      4. coffee is the fucking BEST. still pick up a red bull every now and again.
      5. i got robbed in my first round of playoffs by the worst team in my league. still bitter.
      6. probably a shoe-in for MVP as well
      7. nice!
      8. had a spicy chicken sandwich for lunch today. buffalo is always better.
      9. pretty sure it was a LOST recap.
      10. see #8…dinner i’m not so sure, but not my usual Thursday Buzz. stupid antibiotics.

    • 1. Beverly Hills Cop. As a slight aside, I always reflect on how that movie inspired me to become a musician. Actually, it was Harold Faltermeyers “Axel F” theme song- on which, as a child, I thought the synthesizers sounded so cool.
      2. Sheila E.
      8. Yes please.
      9. Officially, the WMOAT on The Butterfly Effect, but many more before we had required log-ins.
      10. Protein smoothie, turkey sando, orange, vanilla yogurt, apple.

    • 1. Leonard 6*
      3. I misread this and though you wrote there was a new Stereolab album out, which there might be.
      4. Did the tea thing ever work out?
      10. Soy-based fake meat products.

      *JUST KIDDING. #PRANKS

    • 1. Coming to America
      10. Quinoa and broccoli :(

    • 1. Coming to America (Soul Glo alone makes it the obvious choice)
      2. Sheila E
      3. Excellent tip!!
      9. I have no idea, actually. I want to a say an edition of the Hunt, or a Lost recap, but I could be wrong.
      10. Pumpkin gnocchi and spinach. B)

    • 1) This is probably a terrible answer, but I have fond memories of watching The Golden Child when I was younger. I’m kind of afraid to go back and watch it as an adult. (Sad side note: He is only the 2nd result that comes up when you search for “Eddie” in IMDB, behind Eddie Redmayne, whoever that is)
      5) I won my division so I have a 1st round bye. Don’t be impressed, my league is full of dummies and unlucky bastards
      6) He is one of the reasons for #5
      8) The only good thing at this beer bar near my apartment
      9) It was for last year’s Uncoolest person of the year. However, I didn’t realize that the post was like a week old before I had commented. I guess I’m the real dummy.
      10) Same boring lunch, until I saw there was leftover breakfast food from an earlier meeting. I literally had all the bacon and eggs they had.

    • 1. beverly hills cop
      8. yes
      9. something involving kim kardashian; i think when jon hamm kept talking about how gross she is? it wasn’t that long ago, but i’m too lazy to look it up. i had been reading vgum for a few years before then, but someone made a very good animorphs joke that compelled me to make an account just to upvote it.
      10. a handful of gummi bears and a grilled salmon burrito. (not concurrently.)

    • 3. Love Eels! I’ll check it out.
      4. I’ve never touched a red bull and never will. Had 3 cups of coffee today.
      9. I think Hunt for the Worst Movie… Dan in Real Life?
      10. Fruit salad (bananas, strawberries, pineapple, coconut, honey), rotisserie chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, 15 bean soup, more fruit salad, then I will have some homemade chocolate caramel crackers (amaaaaaazziiing)

  13. I got my haircut today at lunch because I’m going to my wife’s office Christmas party tonight. Yes, I will be trapped on a boat floating around the harbor with dozens of lawyers for a couple hours, but really, the jokes will just write themselves. And hopefully they have eggnog. And I listened to the new Scott Walker album a bunch of times because I was the only one in the office and it was great.

  14. Me? I’m doin’ fine. In means a lot to me that you asked.

  15. My day has been pretty productive at work, though I have a million home things to do to make up for the fact that I did nothing last week because of school, and I’m going away for the weekend (old person birthday party! It’s a formal tea!)
    But I get a haircut today, that’s pretty fab.

  16. I’m trying (and failing) to work on presentation for my sociology class after receiving a text from a friend I have a huge crush on, who may or may not have a crush on me as well, saying she wants to talk when I get back from the library. I’m having a weird mix of emotions.

  17. I was approached by Jehovah’s Witnesses at the gym. I gotta say, I never thought that would ever happen. Hell, I never thought they would find me there!

    • Them: “Have you heard the good news?”
      You: “That resistance exercise increases bone density? Yes, I have!”

    • I came up with a new critique of the JWs today when I was washing some dishes. It never really hit me before, but most of the little details they use to justify being the “one true religion” are actually insanely trivial. Like, what all-powerful and loving god would care if you mistakenly thought he was a trinity, or called him by the wrong name? Or celebrate birthdays, or get a blood transfusion? Et cetera? You’d have to be nuts to think that any of that stuff is life-or-death important, but they do.

  18. I ate a chocolate croissant and had coffee with egg nog instead of milk. I’ve been in meetings all afternoon and it is really cutting into my internet time. I finally got groceries, all week i was just eating pastries from the cafe next to work. I have to write a paper tonight, but i already have a head ache. I hope everyone else iz doing great!

  19. Recovery update: Still have a giant, but getting smaller, hole in my boob. But things are getting better. Had this crazy vacuum thingy put in this week, which is really cumbersome. I won’t go into to many details, but I have to wear this purse thingy that carries the vacuum at all times, and even sleep with it, but it’ll help to heal faster. My mom is here helping with the kiddo for now and my husband comes home this weekend, yay! On a positive note, it’s a hilarious injury to have, and most of my friends can’t resist texting me variations of “how’s your boobie today.” You can’t stay too grumpy when getting messages like that all day.

    • What happened, if you don’t mind filling us in again? I am glad you’re recovering steadily! Is the purse at least fashionable? I think all medical accessories should be patent leather with classic lines.

      • I’m a new mom, and breastfeeding, and I got a blocked duct and really bad infection. Had to have surgery last week to have the milk drained, and they can’t just stitch you back up after that because the milk would just come back in and get infected again. So the recovery is a bitch, but I’m lucky I guess that we caught it before the infection got super bad.

    • I must admit that I would be that friend. Glad you’re feeling better!

  20. Just found out my old band’s music was used in the latest Kid President video! A dream come true! Hopefully that event will be enough to power me through finals week.

    • that’s so cool! once my band had a few songs in some sjsu student film, sort of without our knowledge. (the filmmaker had put out an ad asking for local bands to submit songs, and we did, but then they never bothered to tell us they had actually used a couple of them until after the film had premiered.) (actually, they never contacted us at all; we found out later from a friend who happened to see it.) but that’s not NEARLY as cool as kid president.

  21. I am going to a coal protest and discussion tonight and am kind of tired because I was up late last night researching intense questions about long-term effects regarding wildfire risks, insurance matters and corporate responsibility vs. individual responsibility to ask to the Ambre Energy people and the Oregon Department of Environmental Quality. Because if coal is being shipped through dense forests and creates a situation that could lead to massive wildfires, will the person who accidentally sparked that fire be held accountable or will it be the responsibility of the group that has been leaving highly combustible matter along railways and waterways that sit right next to the forests? Also, when they look at the increased revenue and job creation that the coal industry is touting, are they also factoring in extra emergency responders and firefighters… and later, in the rainy season, the responders who work with flooding and mass erosion and landslides? How are they planning to navigate and prevent landslides (something very common with clear-cut foresting, which still happens a lot) so that the tracks are not damaged and the cars are steady and will not overturn? And then a bunch of questions about insurance and liability risks and how *that* will affect property values and/or the ability to even get insurance for future residents as a series of wildfires in a general area tends to spike rates.

    If you’re in the Portland area and are interested, it is being held at the Ambridge Event Center at 1333 NE Martin Luther King Junior Blvd. starting at 6 p.m., though the doors open at 4:30. The group I have been volunteering with has a special holiday-themed treat that I helped package up this week. (It’s lumps of coal found along the Portland tracks next to the Columbia that are already being left there by the energy and rail companies currently shipping small amounts of coal through the city to sell to China! It makes a great stocking stuffer for the kids!!)

    Also, I’m trying to psych myself up for the drive to my parents’ place in 2 weeks. The drive is so long and so intense and I hate it so much. So if anyone has tips… please please please share!! I got the This American Life app, but I worry it won’t be enough. Plus I’ll be driving around when the Mayan stuff is set to go down and the idea of being near all these quasi-dormant volcanoes is totally freaking me out.

    • And thanks to my recent spat of activism I got invited to a “hey congratulations on getting out of house arrest for ecoterrorism” party tomorrow. And I really really want to go, but I also really, really don’t want to be tailed by the FBI. But at the same time, I work from home making websites, so maybe it would add a new dimension to my stories about how weird vans are parked near my house??? I hope the Feds like marathons of Gilmore Girls and The O.C. because that is what they will get!! Or I’ll do my crying Clarie Danes impersonation every time I leave the house for Homeland-based laughs.

      • As someone who knows a lot of activists, I can say that they are sometimes the most boooooooooooring drunks. Also, I hate being anywhere near pot, so I probably wouldn’t go. But you never know!
        Also, great job on the research and going to the thing tonight. Good luck – I hope you get to ask a lot of your questions!
        I can recommend some big fun podcast if you want, too!

        • Yeah, actually, the pre-party on Monday broke out into acoustic guitar song as beer was had. I forgot how comically awkward I am around singalongs and acoustic guitars and that’s probably why I am helping them build websites and not doing more active activism. Except stuff like this. Plus I dress up like a young Republican and bring up fiscal questions after the 35th question about community gardens. I’m positioning myself as an asshole carpetbagger who will take my California telecommuting money and get the hell out if my quality of life is compromised. It’s really fun. Plus the people are great.

      • Yeah, I would go the podcast route too. I used to have a 2 hour commute for school, and listened to Science Friday from NPR (which will make you feel better about that whole Mayan prophecy thing) and Filmspotting, a movie review podcast. It’s been a while, so I don’t know if they still make the last one.

      • I think if you attend this party you’ll get to hear some cool stories about Burning Man. So there’s that.

    • I love listening to podcasts for long drives. There are some other great NPR shows that are easy to listen to, particularly Planet Money and Radio Lab. For outside the NPR world, I tend toward the ridiculous; Mike and Tom Eat Snacks (MATES), The Pod F. Tompkast, How Did This Get Made?, Dead Author’s Podcast, any podcast that involved Paul F. Tompkins is a good bet.

    • We downloaded tons of podcasts for our road trip a couple months back, but mostly we listened to This American Life. There is so much good stuff on there! I highly recommend The Incredible Case of the P.I. Moms, but basically every one was pretty awesome. Other than that, I enjoyed some of the podcasts other monsters recommended when I asked, including How Did This Get Made, Stuff You Missed in History Class, and The Moth podcast.

      • I downloaded all the TAL I could find last year for the last trip and heard the P.I. Moms story as I drove around Mt. Shasta. I now forever associate one with the other… so that is a very apt recc!!

        I think the history and science ones would be best… How Did This Get Made is too sometimes too light to distract me from the 10-12 hour drive through snowy mountains passes next to giant trucks and sometimes through terrifying, super dense fog. Also, I never drive at all anymore so that adds to my anxiety. I need stuff to really keep the brain active because otherwise I get nervous, then my dog gets nervous and then it’s just a small Corolla of anxiety. Sort of thinking of doing the 101 for one part of the trip, but if it’s also very steep… maybe not. But I hear it is very pretty and maybe I’ll see sea lions!!! Or otters!!

        • Books on tape? I’ve never tried them, but could be good for a long drive.

          • I did those for the move out to Los Angeles a million years ago and they were great. I bet I could get them from my local library.

            Also: The turnout was FANTASTIC. People were pouring out of the doors and 99 percent of them were there to oppose the proposed coal terminals. I got there early and was still #135 to speak or ask questions. Since I actually had real questions I wanted to hear from one of the bidding contractors, I spoke with their PR lady and learned some of this coal is bound for North Korea. No joke. Also, I talked some people I know out of nabbing food and sodas from the pro-coal spread (massive room, lots of food, 5 people there TOTAL and they all worked for the company) or causing other dumb mayhem as it derails the discussion and makes the entire anti-coal group look like children. An open community meeting is not a place for stupid pranks that 8 people will see. I actually left early because I have a pretty good feeling #135 is not going to speak before midnight and the discussion was closing down at 10. Plus I was hungry. So, anyway, I am impressed with my neighbors and am now at home watching TV with my dog AS THAT IS MY WAY.

  22. Today was mostly good! We got a ton of new books in at work, which is very exciting, but also frustrating because I want to read them all. I am already juggling several books, so I don’t need to add to my list. But the books I am trying to all finish are all really good so far. I ate some really good homemade applesauce yesterday, and now all I want to eat is more applesauce. And my coworker who had the kidney transplant is back at work, and it is so great to see her on a regular basis!

    • There are always way too many book to read! I just bought a whole bunch to read over winter break but I’ll never finish them all.

      • Why books did you buy? I am mostly reading children’s and young adult books right now, including the new Lemony Snicket and Lois Lowry’s new book. I also have a lot of comics I want to read and a book about Charley Harper.

        • Whoops, what books did you buy, I mean. I inadvertently sounded like I was judging you for buying books when I think books are one of the most worthwhile things to buy.

        • I’m planning on splitting my time between fun stuff, the new Terry Pratchett and a China Mieville book I got over the summer but didn’t get to and not fun stuff for school–some theory stuff and a couple of art history books.

  23. Today started out crummy but got pretty good! I managed to say some halfway intelligent things during class and then when I got home, I found a package from one of my best friends! She got me an activity book for adults featuring puzzles like “fill in the void” and “hipster or hedge manager”. Then Mr. Dork came home and suggested we order in!

  24. today there was a gas leak at the cheesesteak shop next to my work but we didn’t even get to go home because of it so it’s like what’s the point

  25. My day just got GREAT, guys. A couple weeks ago, my dog turned my boot into a chew toy, and I was really, really sad about it. These boots are 1. expensive, 2. a gift from my parents, and 3. other than a pair of flip flops, my only new pair of shoes in 2012, and I love them very much. I called the boot store and the manufacturer, and both parties basically said, “NOPE your problem, can’t even give you a discount on a second pair,” which like, sure, but also, fuck you yes you can give me like 20% off.

    Anyway, I took the boots to a cobbler I found on Yelp who works down the street from my house, and he assured me he could make them good as new. This seemed like a lie, but I picked them up today and they look amazing! This boot doctor is just magical!

    Question, though – do you tip a cobbler? I didn’t, and now I’m thinking, are you supposed to tip cobblers? I will go tip him tomorrow if that’s what I’m supposed to do. I’ll definitely write a good Yelp review.

  26. So this information is up on the Facebook page, but there will be not one, but TWO L.A. Monster Meets in the coming month. The official meet with the official flyer is on January 5, 2013, at Thirsty Crow. If you can’t make that or want to meet up sooner, there will also be something next Sunday, December 16, location/time TBA. There are two dates because there were two parallel planning committees, and since there are at least a few people who can make one date but not the other, we decided not to merge. There is nothing wrong with attending both! We like each other okay, right?

  27. I have been completely broke for one week and will continue to be broke until next Thursday. I’ve been living on oatmeal and carrots and grilled chicken breasts. I am five pounds lighter, so I DID lose weight ha. But seriously, I am want to eat so much food always right now.

    SO anyway, the reason I’m broke is because I spent some money on a couple black friday dealies, thinking my ThxGivs OT pay would be included on my next paycheck. Get a load of this: That’s not how these paychecks work! They go ahead and pay you for 40 hours of REGULAR, projected work, and then make adjustments on your NEXT paycheck. I’m clinging to $20 that I am trying not to spend.

    So anyway anyway, today at lunch I went home and had a bag of carrots while I played Dark Souls on my XBox and TV (these are the culprits, people. These are the things I spent my precious money on). In a half hour I defeated two nerve-wracking bosses (the Firesage Demon and the Centipede Demon down in SURPRISE The Demon Ruins, for anyone who may know of the game). Crunch crunch crunch fight fight fight. All the while I was listening to the new episode of improv4humans. Then I went back to work and blah blah blah.

    Turns out though, that since the holidays are approaching, there are party foods distributed all over the common areas in my work building! So I wound up eating 3 christmas cookies (shaped like a tree, a snowman with silver metallic dragées for eyes AND buttons, and a candy cane), 4 bacon-wrapped dates, 2 little mini roast beef sandwiches, buncha hummus, CHEESE (CHEESE, people. CHEESE!), and now I’m stuffed. It was also bagel Thursday this morning. I made out like a BANDIT.

    Now I’m sleepy. Work ends in 14 minutes.

    • I forgot to add that another way in which my purchases screwed me over is that a comic book I have been looking forward to for the majority of this year came out yesterday, and it’s sitting in the pull list box at Meltdown Comics right now and I can’t read it for another week.

      The comic book is the newest issue of Hellboy, probably my favorite comic book series. Mike Mignola is back on art duties, you guys.

      • I keep meaning to start reading Hellboy, but I haven’t gotten around to it yet, even though we have the first eleven volumes at work. I read The Amazing Screw-on Head last year, and I really liked it. I started reading King City by Brandon Graham a couple weeks ago, and it’s strange but interesting. I also just bought the last two volumes of Pinocchio,Vampire Slayer, but I am reluctant to start them because that’s it for the series. What other comic series do you like?

        • I loved the Amazing Screw-On Head, and when it came out as just an issue I bought 5 copies and mailed them to some of my friends. TAS-OH & Other Curious Objects is a great book. Mignola’s writing style and his narrative art skills are top-tier stuff. If you liked TAS-OH&OCO then you’ll probably really like Hellboy. It’s not like the films (not knocking the films, they’re just WAY different, although certain parts of the second one felt more like the comic than the first film, and even then, the first film I liked more with the deleted scenes put back in). Hellboy is gothic horror meets pulp fun and is just teeming with existing mythology wrapped into a whole new thing. Seed of Destruction, Wake The Devil, The Chained Coffin and Others, The Right Hand of Doom, Conqueror Worm, Strange Places. These first 6 trades chronicle the first 1/3 of Hellboy’s adventure. Then Mignola stepped off of art duties but wrote Darkness Calls, The Wild Hunt, and The Storm and the Fury, which is the second 1/3. The new issue that just came out is truly the beginning of the final chapter of Hellboy.

          Books I like:
          Y: The Last Man, Saga, Desolation Jones, Nextwave, Bone, Blankets, Blacksad, anything drawn by Jack Kirby, POWERS was good for a long while, any Daniel Clowes book (Like A Velvet Glove Cast In Iron, David Boring, Ghost World, Eightball, etc), Black Hole, PLANETARY (love me some Planetary), The Authority, Scott Pilgrim, Empowered, and of course the usual V For Vendettas, Watchmens, Sandmans, Alan Moore’s Swamp Thing, Alan Moore’s Top 10 line of comics.

          I like Brandon Graham quite a bit, but have only read him sporadically in little stand-alone issues of things. King City has a lot of good word swirling about it. I need to check it out.

          • I recently checked out Y: The Last Man, and it’s just sitting waiting for me to read it. I read a few issues of Runaways though, and I liked them pretty well. Have you read X’ed Out? I liked the first volume a lot, but I haven’t gotten The Hive yet. Daniel Clowes is one of my favorites too. I like Wilson and Mr. Wonderful in particular. I also love everything Gene Luen Yang has done, especially The Eternal Smile. It is one of those books that makes me angry that I didn’t write it. Castle Waiting by Linda Medley is really good, and I like the Flight anthologies a lot too. I end up reading a lot of all-ages comics because I work with kids, and the Amulet series by Kazu Kibuishi is one of my favorites. A couple of years ago, I got to compile a list of comics to buy to update our graphic novel section, and it was easily one of the best things I’ve ever had to do in my job. Yay comics!

          • I loved X’ed Out but have not yet picked up The Hive yet. Probably do that with some Xmas cash. I also haven’t read any of Clowes’ comic strip format books. My friend has read them and recommends them highly.

            I haven’t heard of Gene Luen Yang and The Eternal Smile. Castle Waiting is another one. I’ve flipped through the Flight anthologies, and the poster for the first volume is the only personal item I have hanging in my cubicle at work (used more as a sign post marker in the endless expanse of cubicles and cabinets than anything else). They are beautiful books. Haven’t read Amulet either!

            I’ll have to check all those out! Thx!

            OH! I also wanted to recommend three Grant Morrison books: We3, and the first two volumes of Seaguy (the final volume has not been published yet, and I’m assuming it’ll stay that way until Morrison and Cameron Stewart can match up their schedules for the final volume). We3 is a little more adult, with some graphic violence (it’s like Homeward Bound if the lost pets were a rabbit, a cat and a dog and they were in government experiment mech suits being pursued by the military. it gets sad). And Seaguy is just bizarre. I still haven’t wrapped my head around it fully. it’s definitely a commentary on superheroes. But what’s it saying? Debatable!

    • yeah, this is me! Except the reason I am living off nothing is because I didn’t realize a big check I wrote weeks ago hadn’t been cashed, so I was like “Hey, I have some money! I’ll pay extra on my loans!” and then realized that check hadn’t been cashed and now I have next to nothing. curses. I need to get better at money.

      This is why I always have backup cans of beans and boxes of rice in my cupboard. emergency food rations.

  28. Any thread with a mention of Scott Walker is one I want to be in. I spent yesterday afternoon listening to Christmas music and then took a brief break to listen to SW’s new album and the juxtaposition of the two made me feel crazy.

    Today was ok. I’ve been battling headaches for the past week and last night made the ill-advised choice to google “cluster headaches” and so in addition to now freaking out over the slightest sniffle (http://abcnews.go.com/Health/arizona-woman-dies-brain-fluid-leaks-nose/story?id=17849038#.UMFVKoNfCSo), I’m also convinced I’m about to start getting “suicide headaches.” Life as a hypochondriac is challenging, yo.

    I second (third?) the recommedation of audio books. Like most Angelenos, my car is my 2nd home: listening to audio books has saved my life on the 405.

    • Did anyone else ever get to a really good part in the audiobook and not want to get out of the car and go into the house? I’ve spent some time in the garage, lets just say.

      • I have definitely sat behind the wheel in a parking lot looking straight ahead and completely caught up in a story and looking like a crazy person to anyone walking by.

  29. in an update to last week’s award-winning “i went to the doctor” post, i had a CT Scan on Monday. It was weird and mildly unpleasant (you have to drink a bunch of stuff called Contrast that tastes terrible, then get an IV of iodine which makes you feel like you’re peeing yourself even though you aren’t – it’s the coolest/least cool experience ever). Anyways, I have 3 hernias! I didn’t even know that was possible, but at least it is something treatable and they figured it out. Now I have to get sliced open a little bit most likely over the Xmas holiday, but hurrah, I went to the doctor and they are going to fix me! Hopefully!

  30. Hey, everybody! How’s everybody been? I don’t comment so much anymore but you’re all very lovely to read. I hardly have the time to check the site anymore; I’ve been so busy with work. I work for a small agency and the past few days I’ve been doing the editing and post-production on a video project about our company so far, and more specifically, my boss. It’s a motivational speech-y type video, but it’s a project I’ve been pretty psyched about and if any of you care to watch it, it would mean a lot to me. I’m in it, too, which is fun! :)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObD0F0vJSJA

    Alright, cool! Keep up the good work, everybody! The weekend is so soooooon.

  31. I took a half day from work, so I got to wake up and savor my morning. Then I had a night class, which was mostly about working on our final projects (webpages and flashy things). Then I got a migraine and I started to feel like crap. What I learned: Advils taste sweet and if you chew them (I can swallow pills without water but today I just wasn’t able to do it) they taste like evil wasabi bits.

    This is my last day of multimedia class, so I’ll miss all the good times with my professor and classmates. The work not so much. I did learn a ton of things this semester. For instance, I can photoshop things into things and do html thingies.

    I also saw Parks and Recreation and Tammy chasing Leslie with the ask made me lol irl. I’m easily amused but it’s not easy to get me to lol at something on the screen.

    Also, I like to sing when I’m in a very good mood, which I haven’t been in a while, so when I was the last passenger on the train, I sang “Hallelujah” with abandon. I don’t generally sing solo in public (it’s one of my many fears), so I relished the alone time. I’m not a bad singer, as I’ve been told by the few people that’ve heard me, it’s like I get really nervous and I waver.

    Also today is St. Nicholas day (we call Mikulás) so I got some presents this morning. It’s like getting a fix before the big score (Christmas).

  32. I didn’t get to post this last night because I was busy with my bar trivia team coming in THIRD PLACE, YEAH! But I am so excited to share with everyone that I GOT OFFERED THAT JOB ON MONDAY. They are super excited about me and really want me to take it but they have to hold their horses because my current employer is making a counter-offer, so I feel like a really fancypants. I’m not going to take it (unless it is a million dollars and never having to work again), but it’s nice to feel wanted. And my boss was really cool about the possibility of me leaving and will not be a dick about it at all, I don’t think.

    I am so fortunate in my life right now it is RIDICULOUS and I hope any monsters who are not having a good time of it can take my good fortune as a sign that they will have some in their life too, because my life has really, really sucked for about two years, I am not even going to get into it.

  33. I am very late to this thread, but better late than never, amirite?! Great joke, truck. Anyway, thanks for asking about my day! My day yesterday was pretty good even though I made slow cooker soup that I was really excited about that turned out to be pretty mediocre and not really worth the anticipation. Lately I’ve been realizing how much it stinks to not have a best friend in town. I have a couple VERY VERY great best friends but they all live states away from me and my friends in town are nice but I’m not very close to any of them (also don’t have any one best friend in town). My husband is super awesome and definitely my best friend, but it bums me out that I don’t have a best girlfriend in town, know what I mean? Also I don’t have any work best friends either which is really a bummer because sometimes you need to vent about that crazy lady who does the whatever and mrs. soup-slurper. You guys know what it’s like to have a friend at work. But it is nice to have internet buddies like you guys!

    • I hear you, sister. I’m pretty much in your boat. I do have the great fortune of having one best friend who travels to my neck of the woods a few times a year, but it’s still not the same as living in the same city. What’s worse is that I probably see him more than some of my so-called “good friends” who live here. Ah, this is turning into bummer city. I’m going to go watch that snow video again.

  34. I’m at work (boo). But I’m also catching up on videogum, so yay? Nah, it’s just not the same unless I’m home covered in cats.

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