Here is a photo of David Hasselhoff dressed up as Santa Claus on a beach. According to the “article” about this photo, it was 30 degrees outside, but Hasselhoff was a total pro! Look at him grinning with the good holiday cheer! (Although I would so much rather see the photoset where David Hasselhoff is dressed as Santa Claus on a beach and looking so angry the whole time.) It’s hard to tell who this is appealing to, or what the idea is behind it. Like, are we making fun of David Hasselhoff? Because 150 years ago he had a TV show that often took place on a beach? Or is this a celebration of David Hasslehoff? Are we enjoying Christmas or is Christmas stupid? You would think that irony and sarcasm would appeal more to a younger audience, but do the kids even know about this guy? Outside of that one depressing YouTube I have never even watched because life is short and we all have to make choices? If that’s their only reference point, then maybe Santa should have a reindeerburger in his mouth? These are all great and important questions and I definitely expect answers. And captions. Mostly captions, actually.
The winner will receive special placement in this week’s Monsters’ Ball. Something something stocking stuffer reference something something you earned it.