Have you ever been in a situation where you’ve had to watch football? Maybe you were at a friend’s house and they are participating in a fantasy football league this year and they wanted to see how a player was doing, or maybe you were at a bar and didn’t know that the particular bar would have a game on because if you did you would’ve chosen a different bar, or maybe you decided last year that you are going to root for the Dolphins as a joke, because the idea of that team is somehow funny to you, but you’ve gotten too deep into it and now turn on games just to “joke root” for the Dolphins and “joke taunt” the other team, knowing full well that the joke is really on you because now you are watching a football game? WELL DO I HAVE A SOLUTION FOR YOU! Simply go to the TV, turn it off, boot up your computer, find this link, and load up this incredibly talented little girl’s YouTube football highlight reel. All of the fun, and none of so boring and painful-looking!

You: I have a better idea.
Your Friend: What?
You: Let me just…
Your Friend: What? Wait, don’t turn off the TV. THEY WERE JUST ABOUT TO DO A GOAL! (?)
You: Relax! I wouldn’t turn off the game unless I had something better, ok?
Your Friend: What are you talking about?!
You: Here.
Your Friend: What is this?
You: Just watch!
Your Friend: Are you kidding me? Turn on the TV, this isn’t funny. She is very talented, and I get it, but can you just stop.
You: Just watch the video, friend.
Your Friend: TURN ON THE TV.
You: You’re being difficult.
Your Friend: WHAT THE FUCK?

Scene. (Thanks for the tip, Alex!)

Comments (27)
  1. That’s pretty good, but this is even better:

  2. Kelly, have I ever told you that I like the cut of your jib? Because I do. This entire post is playing me softly.

  3. Kelly, if you recap NFL Hard Knocks next year that would be my favorite thing ever.

  4. I’m doing fantasy football this year! I am 3rd in my league! I don’t even know the different positions, or the names of my players! I won last week without even putting in a defense! I’m the best fantasy footballer ever!

  5. Awww! She is awesome and totally adorable!

    Do y’all want to hear a fun “children playing football” story? Of course you do.

    When I was a girl, I was a Pop Warner cheerleader for 2 years, and during our big playoff game one of our players LOST PART OF HIS FINGER in the game. WE WERE 11. He ran up to the sideline, held his bloodied finger up to the coach, and passed out. His mom jumped from the stands into the bushes on the field to get to him. We had to stop the game, and an ambulance drove onto the field to get him. FUN! FOOTBALL!

    (No lie, I actually do enjoy football on occasion, esp. college football, and I haven’t even watched that much this year! I need to correct this.)

  6. Growing up I played Pop Warner football and there was always at least one girl in our team. I’ve been to a couple of pro women’s Football games and I always wondered why they didn’t play with a junior ball. The passing game kind of suffers because of the full size ball. Also, I think they would benefit from playing with lighter pads and perhaps a weight limit (for safety, I think the NFL should have one too, 400lbs is too many lbs). Anyways, sorry for the hangover string of words, what I’m trying to say is, good job, lil Sam Gordon.


  8. I’m going to go ahead and claim that her favorite football player is Wes Welker.

  9. Look at that video still. Her Tom Brady face is dead-on.

  10. Eli has a very, “lost little boy” vibe so it shouldn’t be too hard.

  11. She plays like a girl.

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