What a beautiful new world we’re living in. You know, it wasn’t too long ago that you couldn’t use The Hobbit money as real money, and you couldn’t eat The Hobbit themed food for every meal, and when you flew with New Zealand Air you had to watch regular humans give you the pre-flight rules and suggestions for flight safety, rather than charming The Hobbit-themed characters. It’s funny — once you get used to something, even if it’s something you never really imagined would happen, it’s really hard to go back and think about how you ever lived another way. Can you imagine a time when we didn’t go outside and the streets were carved into Hobbit face shapes? A time when our shoes weren’t shaped like Hobbit feet? A time when the popular makeup craze was to make your face look as much like Bilbo Baggins’ face as possible? A time when New Zealand wasn’t just a The Hobbit theme park? I mean, I certainly KNOW this time existed, but it just doesn’t FEEL like it ever did. You know?

I love this world. I hope it never ends. (Via SlashFilm.)

Comments (30)
  1. If they were serious about this they would have done it in Elvish with subtitles. Amateurs.

  2. Hasn’t safety ALWAYS been for nerds?

  3. You Shall Not Pass (Through The First Class Curtain)

  4. You know what, though? I watched the whole thing and I usually make a point of ignoring these videos when I fly, because you can force me to buckle my seat belt and put my tray table up, but you don’t own me.

  5. I assume this airline only caters to destinations in the furthest west.

  6. Seriously do not get why everybody is making a big deal out of a boring book that was adapted into three different movies, for triple the profits, by a director who used to make original and creative work, and has not directed a movie that wasn’t a remake or adaptation in over 15 years and I hate this world.

    • #trolltaco

      • I might occasionally have trollish tendencies, but I really do just hate Peter Jackson so very much for being the biggest sellout the world has ever seen that I cannot even keep my thoughts in. It’s not one of my more endearing qualities.

        • I like Heavenly Creatures a lot. But I don’t think in general Jackson’s work was ever hugely “original”. (even Heavenly Creatures is an adaptation of a true crime story)

          • Yeah, but The Frighteners was good, I enjoyed Bad Taste for what it was, and even if Meet The Feebles wasn’t what I would call GOOD, it was at least original.

          • I think that the only one of his movies that I would truly call both original and creative is, yeah, probably Frighteners.

            Bad Taste, lol, I mean, was practically a student film really.

            I think he is mostly a competent facilitator of quality motion pictures. I don’t know how much we are all missing out on because Jackson stopped churning out original materials. (I do need to see Frighteners again soon though! That movie was really good.)

          • I mean, you’re mostly right, Frighteners and Heavenly Creatures were great, but he might not have ever done anything else worthwhile. I would still rather he crank out half-formed movies with original ideas than slapping a bunch of special effects over a plot someone else came up with and then figuring out how to turn it into the biggest paycheck possible.

          • I think that that statement very accurately encompasses a larger discontent with all of modern Hollywood, for me at least.

            It would be a much nobler thing to fail at ambitious creative endeavors that bring new ideas into the world. Than to bring to market old ideas in aesthetically pleasing new packaging as a way of leveraging name recognition for monetary gain at the expense of anything artistically or intellectually valuable.

            But. Capitalism and everything. You get what you’ll pay for.

    • It’s almost like the bible.

    • I have a tattoo in elvish. I HAVE to make a big deal about this, or my life is meaningless.

      • I am jelly beans. What is it? Can we ask? What does it say?

        • What it actually says: probably gibberish.

          What I think it says: Soylent. I transcribed ‘soylent’ into elvish, and it is tattooed in green. Because I am awesome*.

          *because I am so desperately nerdy it makes people weep**.

          **just my mother, actually.

          • But soylent green is PEOPLE, right? So in Elvish, that might actually be an acceptable food?

          • Another monster on here– I won’t say who– translated “Not all who wander are lost” into the best Elvish they could muster, and got it tattooed on their arm.

            To clarify- this person is not me. I DO think that’s a cool idea for a tattoo, but the tattoo on my arm reads, “Satyagraha,” which is not Elvish and using regular human letters.

          • I have no tattoos. If I did, it would be one that says “This is not a tattoo.”

          • Reading this I think I finally understand what it must be like to be a woman looking at Benedict Cumberbatch holding a baby…

    • Especially when the cartoon is perfect.

  7. Oral sex innuendos in a safety video? New Zealand Air does not give a fuck.

  8. If I fly it will be on a Nazgul or carried by a giant eagle as the Valar intended.

  9. I know which airline I am going to use to stalk Bret and Jemaine now. All I need is to find some Australians to help me steal enough Hobbit money to fly Business Premiere because that looks neat!!

  10. Can we talk about the “Sky Couch” and the general way that Air New Zealand isn’t at all shy about showing how much better premium travelers have it?

  11. My first reaction to this video was “Nerds!” But I’m the one who spent 4:30 of my life trying to identify characters from a book based on previous viewings of a movie based on another book.

  12. I actually live in New Zealand and it’s strange the way my country’s slow move from reality into fantasy is revealed to me by way of a pop culture blog.
    My Dad even works for Air New Zealand and this is the first time I’ve heard about this thing.

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