Is anyone else tired to the point of tear-stained exhaustion? I know it can’t just be me and this little girl. Between the election and the storm and Halloween, it’s too much! Sometimes you just want to walk out into the woods, your feet crunching through the dead and dying leaves, and find some quiet, little clearing out in the middle of nowhere where the only sound is the beating of your own heart, and you want to dig a hole in the soft, cool earth, a hole big enough for your own body, and you want to lie down in that hole and wait for the forest trolls to bury you so you can sleep forever. You know what I mean? I guess maybe I could just go to bed a little earlier. But I think I’ll head to the forest and take my chances with the trolls. Oh sweet forest trolls, I am ready for your precious benediction! Take me away to the land of gorgeous dreams! This little girl knows what I’m talking about:

WHO ARE YOU VOTING FOR, FOREST TROLLS?! “Gabe, that’s personal!” WHATEVER, TROLLS, I HAVE A HUNGER, MAKE ME A CLOUD AND ACORN SANDWICH! “Why did we ever invite him into our realm?!” WINTER IS COMING! “Ugh.” (Thanks for the tip, werttrew.)

Comments (22)
  1. If he had legally changed his name to Bronco Bama, the president would be 10 points ahead in every poll because who WOULDN’T vote for a guy named Bronco Bama?!

  2. This was a very funny post. If you have any gold stars, you should print off this post, put a gold star sticker on it, and hang it on the refrigerator.

    Also how does everyone in the world not see that children are just drunk adults. I had this same breakdown recently, only it was about the Kardashians. I’m just so tired of them! Ugh!

  3. Jesus, I hope she doesn’t turn on The Weather Channel.

  4. Gabe is totally right. I spent a lot of yesterday watching the storm coverage and crying and holding my dog. Then I slept for 12 hours and now I’m just tired emotionally and physically and still sad. I think I’ll go hang out in the woods for awhile too.

  5. I am ready for Cumberbatch’s precious Benediction, ifyouknowwhatimean!!

    #gross #totallynotsorry

  6. Bronco Bama staring in The Erectorial College

  7. Poor girl. Can someone please get her some more sand?

  8. It must be tough, being a five year old girl who pays attention to newspaper editorials and cable news pundits all the time. Watch some cartoons, kid!

  9. Don’t be sad, girl. Your fur-hooded Hello Kitty jacket is adorable.

  10. FOUR MARE YEARS! FOUR MARE YEARS!

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