You know what’s weird? One week from today this whole election thing will just be over and we will know who won and we will have a president for another four years and life marches on. I know that’s not that weird. Stuff happens all the time. One week ago there were no known effects from Hurricane Sandy. Time marches ever forward. But I guess what I mean is that a week is really not very much time. You know? It’s a completely manageable and easily-considered amount. You can probably picture what you’re going to be doing from now through election night with a few gray areas or mystery spots. And, on that same note, it is very easy to imagine yourself one week from now. Everything about you is pretty much the same (although maybe you are a little happier/more relaxed or a little sadder/more concerned) and yet the world around you has indelibly shifted. After weeks and months of thinking and planning and wondering and hoping (or whatever you have been doing) you can now quite simply fast forward using only your mind and be there right now. Go ahead. Try it. See? (You CAN do this with longer stretches of time. Like sometimes I imagine myself on my 60th birthday, just two short years from now, looking back on this time and wondering why I wasted so much of it. But this kind of travel is much riskier because you really can, from that vantage point, if you reach your now mind out and try to connect with the future mind, eventually you will, and this creates a dangerous opportunity on that day in the future to completely obliterate decades into a tiny shred of a hyperspeed half-memory. Be careful.) Now you are a real Marty McFly. (Video via JoeMande.)

Comments (15)
  1. But what do the power bottom Republicans have to say?

  2. Oh man, Romney is a terrible asshole, but this video reminded me that there were even more terrible assholes in the running for a while! It’s nice to know that they actually left very little in the way of streak marks on my memory.

    • Same here, although in my situation I think most of the thanks is owed to my very good friend whisky. I<3U Whisky!

    • Honestly, I don’t know if they’re more terrible assholes. Now, don’t get me wrong, they’re definitely terrible assholes, but at least you KNOW the degree of terrible asshole they are. Romney is all that shit combined with the sleezy businessman persona that lets you know you’re getting a terrible asshole, but you’re never gonna know which one it is until hours after it fucked you.

      I, uh, what were we talking about?

      • Romney’s demeanor is the spitting image of this CEO’s at a place I worked. Guy called a company-wide meeting one Wednesday to quell rumors that there were going to be massive layoffs. Swore we were stable and safe and moving forward together, everyone a valuable member of the team, etc.

        Friday, the massive layoffs began.

        I have never been able to figure out why he held that meeting.

    • The worst part is that most to all of these terrible assholes, if you asked them right now, would probably assure you with great certainty that Romney is an honest, principled man with a clear vision who is very good at Business and definitely most qualified to be president.

      Basically, fuck politicians.

  3. actual time travel is real. and Newt Gingrich will prove it when we actually have a moon colony by the end of his second term….IN 2112!!!!

  4. This–combined with the Romney ignoring FEMA questions video–makes me angry.

  5. When will politicians start to discuss the real issues? #temporalpraradox #letsgetreal

    • Perhaps the future moon president can travel back in time to explain it to his infant self, and then his infant self can explain it to the rest of us once he learns how to articulate, please?

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