If we don’t dress up like King Ralph and a snow sex rabbit elf queen, then the hurricane wins. I’m not even sure what these costumes are about since Courtney and Doug ARE American royalty and they WILL live in the White Castle one day, which will be where the White House sits now but it will replace the seat of our current democratic government with a traditional, God-given monarchy. It will also double as an actual White House restaurant. THE QUEEN DEMANDS MORE CHICKEN RINGS! IS IT NOT BREAKFAST TIME?! What a pair. So glad they rule us. True fairy tale for us all. (Via BuzzfeedCelebz.)

Comments (19)
  1. It’s nice that he still takes her out trick-or-treating every year.

  2. She is either a unicorn or Ke$ha or Doug Hutchinson’s friend’s daughter.

  3. i love seeing pictures of these two because they look so different every time. she looks like she’s gotten new plastic surgery with each new set of photos and he looks creepier and creepier with each passing day.

  4. Please let this gif of a dancing kitty make you all happy again:

  5. I know this guy who is a minor Montreal celebrity, who looks like Frank Zappa and has this “crazy” fake persona that is on ALL THE TIME and someone made a documentary about him. Anyway, I was talking about how annoying he is with a friend and she pointed out how deeply I love Courtney Stodden, and asked what the difference is between the two. I honestly could not think of a response. I’m questioning a lot of my life choices, is I guess what I’m saying.

    • I find Courtney Stodden endlessly fascinating.

      Even people’s reactions to her existence are tiny little miracles of psychology.

      Because you are supposed to hate her. That is the correct feeling about Courtney Stodden (because boobs).

      And you are also supposed to hate her husband. You are supposed to hate her husband for having sex with a teenager and making her his child bride when she clearly had no where near the emotional or mental maturity to be in such a relationship.

      And you are supposed to hate her mother for facilitating the systemic objectification and molestation of her young daughter.

      But mainly we all need to hate Courtney Stodden. (because cleavage)

      She sometimes seems slightly less dumb than her critics make her out to be. And is the victim of a horribly unhealthy upbringing and has half a dozen adults suckling at the fame generated by her tits (which somehow manages to be even more unsettling than it sounds).
      But we shouldn’t feel any compassion towards her or at any point show her the slightest support. (because she wears tight clothes)

      …I feel like Courtney Stodden has made society the monster and we are now staring at the dark reflections of our own callousness through the looking glass of a teenage girl exposed. And we have thus become a part of the freak show that we have helped to create with our blithe neglect of basic ethics.

      • Clearly Courtney is the worst and is responsible for poverty, global warming, herpes and was maybe the inspiration for the movie Death Sentence.

        You’d be a cad to sarcastically suggest otherwise.

    • I’d guess that it depends on why you hate/love each of them. If you hate Zappa guy just for having a fake persona, then maybe it’s a valid concern. However, I’d bet the distinction is that you hate Zappa guy’s persona whereas you love Stodden’s persona. So keep on loving her! At least this is how I make similar rationalizations to myself…

  6. At least there are some things that remain dependable in these crazy times.

  7. “We have heard of the impious doctrine in the Old World, that the people were made for kings, not kings for the people. Also, what the fuck is she WEARING?” -James Madison

  8. Leg… hat… smile… This Spot-the-difference game is way to easy

  9. these two make me wanna

  10. Pretty sure he’s just way into his king character…I mean, child brides are what real kings did in the Dark Ages right??

  11. Slutty snow raver Jessica Rabbit?

  12. wow Happy Halloween

  13. still can’t digest that he’s Toom’s from that VERY GOOD two-episode story on The X-files.

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