Health is important, and there’s no better way to stay healthy than with a regular routine of cardio-vascular exercise (especially when you are living on a diet of canned tuna and cheese crackers!). But please, if you do go outside wearing nothing but your running shorts and a rubber horse mask, please stay safe. The news crew might give you the kind of attention that helps keep your heart rate up while you wait for the light change, but they aren’t going to do shit for you when some rusted metal awning is ripped from its holdings and Final Destinations your head. Ahhhh! Look out! Run faster! Knees high! Breathe! Now you are looking and feeling good. BREAKING: I have just been informed that Edible Arrangements in Park Slope is still open. (Via LaughingSquid.)

Comments (14)
  1. Glad to see Gabe’s mostly over his killer flu, and now he’s just a little horse.

  2. “This is not a hole in the ground,” Jim Butler, the stereo enthusiast, said. “The waters will come in, and then they will recede. It’s not New Orleans. It’ll be a big deal for a day or two, and then we get to go back to living our life on the waterfront, which is just the greatest place to be.” Dear Brooklyn monsters, please find this person and punch him in the face for me.

  3. I know the storm’s not really here yet, but it’s for real just a little windy in Park Slope and we haven’t had any heavy rain yet. So what I’m saying is that I’m heading out right now to buy a bouquet of chocolate covered strawberries and melon slices to see me through the worst of the storm. You’re all invited to join me!

    • I bought cold-brewed iced coffee already this morning in Greenpoint. Also I found out my neighborhood is starting to flood via instagram. 2012, you guys, my goodness!

      • Wow! Chocolate covered strawberries, melons, and ced coffee? Hunkering down just doesn’t mean what it used to! I’d be on dehydrated ration packets and hard buscuits just on principle.

        • Don’t worry – my larder is filled with hard tack and salt pork.

          • after katrina, when i came back to new orleans after the city was just opened up, i remember standing in line to get MRE’s (which are not terrible) and these absolutely heinous peanut butter and jelly tortilla sandwiches. the peanut butter and jelly both came packaged the way individual slices of american cheese are packaged- wrapped in individual cellophane slices. so. at least you don’t have to eat that! (yet!)

  4. you guys – what if the Mayans didn’t factor in Leap Day and we’re all doomed a little earlier than we thought?

  5. I watched that live on the news this morning!

    You know what sucks? Being the only single roommate, while all other roommates are at their significant others’ houses. It’s great that I don’t have to work today, but seriously, what am I supposed to do all day?

  6. Joe Biden is the best.

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