And so here we are. No more debates! That’s it! In the words of Chuck-E-Cheese, that’s-that’s-that’s-that’s-that’s-all-guys! Did you watch it? I had the flu all day yesterday and I still have almost as much of the flu today actually, but there is nothing that soothes the aching, shivering body like a rigorous debate about foreign policy. LOL. Obviously, the most memorable line was the thing about horses and bayonets. That’s a good line! All the sitcom writers were at home high-fiving. Otherwise, I don’t know. Romney used the word “tumult” so many times you might think he was sending coded messages to an Abu Nazir sleeper cell. What was that all about? He learned one big SAT word and hell if he wasn’t going to get his money’s worth out of the Kaplan prep team! The big story yesterday was how the national polls show Obama and Romney in a dead heat, with 47% of the vote each. Oh perfect! I know that everything is always the same as it ever was, but it does feel like over the past, say, 12 years, things have gotten increasingly fractured in our political system and all that Americans want is for someone to come in and wave a magic wand and make everything perfect, as if that is even an option. Admittedly, in 1968 they beat children in the street during the Democratic National Convention, so what do any of us even know. The important thing is for these undecided voters to decide. Take your time, please! Does this help? This? How about this? Does this? I just want you to make up your mind so bad! (Image via NewYorkTimes.)

Comments (52)
  1. That woman REALLY needs to rethink the layout of her living room.

  2. Obama shaking hands with that cute little boy is sweet. I went to see Alanis Morrisette last night instead of watching the debates and nothing cheers you up more than a couple thousand people screaming “you oughta know” in unison.

  3. OK, so, you guys wanna hear a secret? I didn’t watch any of the debates this time. I know I’m supposed to, for some reason, but fuck that! I haven’t been an “undecided” voter at any point since I started voting for these President types way back in 1996! I decided to save myself the frustration of listening to a bunch of factually dubious non-arguments and just go ahead and vote for Obama based on the fact that these two guys have been campaigning since 2006 and I have a brain with the capacity to recall things I already know about them. Though I do wish I had seen the “horses and bayonets” line live. That sounds like it was pretty sweet.

    • Yep, I didn’t watch last night’s for that reason. Because if you’re decided, it’s pretty infuriating.

    • Agree! I watched the second one to make sure Obama wasn’t going to just lay down the rest of the campaign, and I felt confident enough he’d do fine this time to skip it. And the “horses and bayonets” comment confirmed it. We have less ships than we did in 1916? We don’t use as many hot air balloons for spying as we did in 1865 either. Jeez.

  4. Romney was the most authoritative and convincing on the subject of valves.

  5. This one was a snoozer. I missed all the fingers in each others’ faces and the “check the transcript” stuff. This was far to civilized and therefore very boring.

  6. Mitt Romney sounded like Miss America last night. I want world peace, too, numbnuts.

  7. I tried my darnedest to avoid the debate, but my night class let out early and repeats of Family Guy and A Haunting weren’t cutting it. But I was also working on my adobe flash project, which for some reason involves a bloody sickle and hammer intersecting. We’re supposed to create a logo and all I could think of was Russia and zombies. So when I got really frustrated with that, I turned on the debate. Two frustrations cancel themselves out I guess. I watched it around when Obama was like Romney’s opinion on Iran is the exact same as mine, but he thinks that by saying it louder it will sound original.
    Incidentally over the weekend I threw out my bootleg version of Battleship. I think it was called Ship Attacks or something. My mom got it for me, and it was not like the fancy-name brand Battleship I’ve seen on tv. Does the real one have working lights and sound? I’ve only played it once. I guess that makes me more qualified about naval defense than Mitt Romney.

  8. My biggest problem with the debate was a lack of Sasha and Malia at the awkward milling about epilogue of the debate.
    Romney had his whole extended brood! And dude made a lot of people!

    • Willard brought his 18 grandchildren. We should’ve at least gotten to see one of the Obama girls or a surprise visit from Bo. Bo does not get as much attention as Romney’s dog lately.

    • Suuuuper late to the party here and I’m sure no one will ever read this, but did anyone else notice the crazy hug that Ann Romney gave to Mitt from behind while he was on the edge of the stage greeting his “fans”?? It was soooo awkward!!

  9. Romney lost me when he seemingly advocated for fewer aircraft carriers submarines while advocating in favor or more triremes and caravels. I’m a bit skeptical.

  10. I appreciate that there are fewer bayonets…but what about trebuchets? President Obama, please bring back the trebuchet.

  11. It was pretty obviously dominated by one side. The other side had a few good jabs – drawing blood a few times sure – but never scoring until way late in the game. All in all a thrilling match up of a rivalry growing more and more bitter with each meeting.

    But nonetheless, BEARS WIN!

  12. I’M SORRY THIS IS SO BIG BUT MAN IT’S GREAT:

  13. Who won? What was the score?

  14. Has anyone ever heard the This American Life about functioning psychopaths that do really well in corporate environments because they’re amazing at firing people and raiding companies? Mitt Romney reminds me of that episode… can’t exactly figure out why… Oh right, because he’s a fucking psychopath.

  15. That bayonet line is really going to hurt Obama with the Bull Moose supporters.

  16. I made for people tired of getting all that extra sleep at night…

  17. If they could bottle these debates, no one would ever need a sleeping pill again.

  18. Who else just wants this to be over so all of these terrible people can go back underground and remove their human suits and re-joing the crab people?

  19. I was really excited when Obama creamed Romney 9-0 to clinch his trip to the Fall Classic. I can’t wait to vote for the Obama/Bochey 2012 ticket!*

    * I may be confused as I was watching baseball and streaming the debate at the same time and refused to turn down the volume on either of them.

  20. Why is no one concerned about the PERSON IN THIS WOMAN’S LIVING ROOM?

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