Ew! I hate Robocop’s new outfit! It’s so 2009. One day you are in and the next day you are Robocop, auf wiederscop. Paris Hilton says that Robocop’s new suit is NOT hot. It’s such a lazy pastiche of the Dark Knight, plus G.I. Joe, plus Tron: Legacy, plus SNOOZE BUTTON. They’ve updated Robocop for the kids by embedding the Snooze Button directly into his face! Here’s the thing about this, too: one of the main things that made Robocop so iconic was THE WAY THAT ROBOCOP LOOKED. So, while it was already unadvisable to be remaking Robocop in the first place, because you don’t have to remake everything, and you can start not doing that by not remaking Robocop, at the very least, if you are going to make Robocop, spend a full 10 seconds on his costume rather than the 5 you were going to spend. You know? Maybe you’ll end up doing exactly what you would have done in the first place, but hey, put your phone on airplane mode and turn Twitter off for a full minute because all those tweets are in the library of congress anyways and they are not going anywhere. Hmm, now what should the new Robocop look like? Hmmmm. Oh, just a pile of cliches stitched together with adamanthium webbing in a Daft Punk helmet? Perfect! Skrillex! America’s teens say: please sir, may I have some more?! (Via AV Club.)

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Comments (36)
  1. He looks like he bought that suit for a dollar.

  2. Yeah, it stinks, but they got a great deal; they bought it for a dollar!

  3. Robocrap

  4. Why would a robot look like he’s got abs and pecs, we’ll never know… kinda like the nipples on george clooney’s batman suit.

  5. Robocop? More like NObocop, amirite?

  6. “What if he was also a vampire?” -Hollywood

  7. That outfit looks like the aliens from “Signs” if you ask me (which you kind of did, by posting this story).

  8. As long as he still shoots a guy in the dick, I’m fine with it.

  9. The worst part of all these remakes is that the old versions immediately disappear forever. True story: I went to see the new Total Recall and while I was in theatre, Colin Farrell broke into my house and snapped my Blu-ray in half!

  10. Why isn’t he called Cyborgcop? He still has a human head and brain, so he’s not really a robot.

    #nerdyquestion

  11. Looks like a batman leotard.

  12. It’s like Snake Eyes joined a Tron jai alai team.

  13. That thing is Dredd 3-Dful

  14. Looks like the remake’s going to be dark and humorless! Great!

  15. The six hundred dollar man.

  16. Good news, Commissioner! We were able to save the officer’s head AND his hand!

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