• Here is Sofia Vergara dressed up like Lucille Ball, making a scary face. -Dlisted
  • After seeing the Odd Life of Timothy Green Crying video from a few days ago, FilmDrunk polled a few Uproxx writers about what movies or scenes were too much to handle when they were children. Unless I missed it somehow, no one said the Artex swamp scene from Neverending Story. What? Hello? Uproxx? -FilmDrunk
  • This is an interview with Aaron Paul that is honestly a little boring and VERY long, but I’ll tell you what, I watched the whole thing a couple minutes at a time throughout the morning because that guy looks very nice in a suit. -MovieCityNews
  • Oh, Jesus. Of course there is a “Hot Cheetos & Takis” ukulele cover. You don’t even have to log on to the ‘net anymore, just put different combinations of all the same dumb words together in your mind forever and ever until your brain turns to dust. -HyperVocal
  • Arrested Development is officially returning in the spring of 2013. My goodness. We’re going to be so old then! It’s not that far away, but still, think of how old you’ll be by then. Older than now! Eeek! -WarmingGlow
  • Liza Mundy wrote a piece for The Atlantic about why the female anchors at Fox News wear significantly more makeup than any other networks’ anchors. Turns out it’s just because YOU’RE JEALOUS! -TheAtlantic
  • And, finally, next season Jonathan (Maulik Pancholy) will be returning to 30 Rock after spending last season on Whitney. -AVClub
Comments (15)
  1. Yep, I was about to say no movie ever made me lose it even as a child, but then you mentioned the Neverending Story swamp scene, then I started crying hysterically, remembering, then I started thinking, “Whatever other horrible things from my childhood have I blocked out?” then I remembered some of them, and now I am going to beat up whoever thought drowning a horse in mud would make for a good children’s movie.

    • The Neverending Story was a seminal part of my adolescence. I think Atreyu’s loss of Artax is important because kids need to know about death.

    • Between Artax and my fear of the rock crusher, I didn’t make it through the Neverending Story until I was 13. And even then it was only because a teacher was playing it in class and I didn’t want to admit to the trauma in front of the other kids.

      Did you guys know there’s, like, a wolf in that movie? Crazy, right?

  2. Radar Magazine had a quiz a few years ago (before it was a gossip site) that asked if the featured ladies in said quiz were Fox News reporters or porn stars. I passed it around my newsroom and no one could get better than 50 percent, not even people who watched the channel so they’d know what Fox was reporting.

  3. I’ve been so busy today that I haven’t had much time to make jokes about tattoos and what not so I’ll just say that the movies that always make me cry are Pixar movies – Finding Nemo when he hugs his dad and says, “I love you, Dad” just kills me. Monsters, Inc. when, at the very end he opens the door and all you hear is Boo yell, “Kitty!” and you see his face, holy fuck you guys, so many tears. Also of course Wall-E the whole thing but especially the end…I’m gonna cry just thinking about it. And Toy Story 3 in the thing…ahhhhhh!

    Also these are all from when I was a fully grown-up person and I cried at movies all the time as a child.

    • Gaaaa Toy Story 3!!!

    • Toy Story 3 is a destroyer of souls. Saw it at 10pm opening night, the audience was silent during the scenes at the dump. killer.

      I think kids movies make me cry more than grown-up movies.

      Exception is the “meet me at montauk” scene of Eternal Sunshine. Gets me every time.

    • THE FIRST 10 MINUTES OF UP. GOOD LORD. Also the end of Toy Story 3, obvs. I was watching that ish on a transatlantic flight next to a stranger and just crying my eyes out.

      How about Homeward Bound? When Sassy goes over the waterfall? When Shadow falls into that pit of mud and can’t get out? And then when he *SPOILER ALERT FOR A 15 YEAR OLD CHILDREN’S MOVIE* comes limping up at the end? And his boy runs to him? ALL THE TEARS.

  4. I’ll tell you what DIDN”T make me cry. That scene in The Pagemaster when Horror is in the chains and Mr. Hyde is going crazy and Horror nearly falls in the pit and it’s scary. I for sure didn’t cry at all when I watched that movie again in college. Nope.

  5. I don’t understand my reasoning from when I was young, but when C-3PO got dismantled in Empire Strikes Back I couldn’t handle it. This was at the age of 4 or 5 without fully following the movie itself. I think it was a similar reaction to when all the kids got turned into donkeys in Pinocchio. Both situations seemed irreparable and terrifying. Luckily Chewbacca got C-3PO running again. The donkey kids probably died as donkeys.

  6. I never cried at movies when I was a kid, but now I cry at Air Force One every time I see it. And also Die Hard? I dunno.

  7. It looks like Lucille Ball had a glasgow smile cut into her face. why so serious indeed.

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