As I have mentioned before, there is nothing funnier than a list of “all the examples.” But when you combine a list of “all the examples” with a song about what kinds of breakfast you won’t need when you go to heaven, you are basically a human Microsoft Songsmith, crafting the most scientifically perfect music on Earth. (Via Dlisted)

That being said, some of us are still alive, so you know what that means. It’s time for some beef stew and a big bowl of Nuts of Grape! (Pause.)

Comments (19)
  1. bryan  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +1

    :( No more lucky charms?

  2. Does anyone know if I can book the Invisible Revival Band for a wedding and/or bar mitzvah?

  3. oh.  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +1

    Light bread?

  4. I hadn’t checked the length, and at 2:10 was sure it was about to end.
    How wrong I was.

  5. sol  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +1

    you see? I know I’m not a lyricist, because I could have never thought of “pancakes” rhyming with “beef stakes”. POETRY!
    and I love you, videogum, but 1.40 minutes is enough for me.

  6. Josh  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +12

    This guy seems awfully confident that he’s going to die before noon.

  7. brody  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +3

    this guy is doing a really poor job of selling me on heaven

  8. i don’t think that whole ‘shall not live on bread alone’ thing should have been taken this literally – but whatev – to each his own.

  9. octavis  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +1

    the look on his face at the end is as if he just crafted bohemian rhapsody. well done sir, well done.

  10. No mo’ bacon, orange juice, or coffee?

    Heaven sounds like kind of a drag.

  11. jason  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 0

    Take a look at his teeth! Maybe if he drank less soda pop for breakfast hed have more than 4 teeth

  12. “No mo’ griiits” is the saddest line I have ever heard in a song.

  13. The idea of eternity of heaven was always appealing to me. “No more pain, no more sadness, no more evil” and all of that wonderful stuff my dad would preach from the pulpit. But never once did he ever bring up the “No more breakfast” angle. Now I’m like FUCK YOU HEAVEN. Because, no more captain crunch? I’D RATHER BURN IN HELL.

  14. At least we get a Last Supper.

  15. C  |   Posted on Mar 5th, 2009 +1

    this would probably more effective if they were mentioning the bad things that death might bring an end to.
    no more head lice, no more hang nails, no more chimp maulings…

    I’m hungry.

  16. Wildcat  |   Posted on Mar 9th, 2009 0

    I tihnk he meant “nuts or grains” (?)

  17. Maybe it’s like that Twilight Zone episode and we’re supposed to choose Hell over the Lucky Charms-free Heaven, and it turns out that’s actually Hell.

    Maybe.

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