This week is SNOB WEEK over in Movie Trailer town. We’ve got a trailer for The Life of Pi AND Cloud Atlas. Michiko Kakutani gives these trailers FOUR STARS. I heard Leonard Lopate is going to interview these trailers on NPR today and ask them about GAY MARRIAGE! There’s also a movie with Lizzy Caplan, and some other movies, and most importantly a very very good looking DANCE BATTLE MOVIE, which, like, at what point do we just agree that every movie should be a dance battle movie and get on with it already? Oh well. Let’s at least get on with this already:
Life of Pi
I hated this book and what the hell is this movie? It looks like The Lonely Bones but with less child-rape-murder and more CGI tigers. Blugh.
Man of Steel
The rebooted Zak Snyder Superman movie doesn’t come out for a whole year, but until then we have this beautiful Levi’s commercial. Buy Levi’s.
This looks good! It’s like OUR generation’s Bridesmaids. Seriously, though, people get lazy with comparisons and that is a very easy and obvious comparison to make but this looks good. Right? Right.
Battle of the Year
It is sad for this trailer that the trailer for Battlefield America came out first, because otherwise this would be the best trailer ever. Are you even serious right now? A dance battle movie that takes place in a PRISON where the retired, alcoholic, down on his luck coach is played by SAWYER and also he is a DANCE BATTLE COACH THOUGH? I will never forgive or accept Chris Brown back into my heart after all of the horrible things he has done, but if anything could ever have made me forgive or accept him back into my heart, this would have been it. A for effort. Stay in jail, though, dude.
Sure! Why not? My close, personal, I would say best friend in the whole world is in it, Alia Shawkat. Also: Dr. House fucks Blair Waldorf? DOES CHUCK OR SOME RELEVANT CHARACTER FROM HOUSE BECAUSE I’VE NEVER ACTUALLY SEEN HOUSE KNOW ABOUT THIS?!
Jack and Diane
What? Wait. What?
No thanks! The movie looks totally fine and it’s got James Franco in it and the shadowy underworld of porn is a totally reasonable thing to explore in a film but I’m just, personally, going to say no thanks but good luck to you and your movie!
Cloud Atlas was a good book. You should read Cloud Atlas! I feel like David Mitchell’s jigsaw puzzle maze fiction is sometimes a little too overwrought and a little too “a-ha!” for my taste, but I did think Cloud Atlas was nice. And this movie looks “moving” and “pretty” and has lots of good actors in it and love and fate and all that. But maybe just read the book, huh?