Kelly: Hey, Gabe
Gabe: hey kelly
Kelly: HOT ENOUGH FOR YOU?
Kelly: hahahaha
Gabe: are you kidding?
Gabe: it’s too hot!
Gabe: why would you ask that? you don’t think it’s hot?
Kelly: It’s just I feel like you’re always like
Kelly: “It’s not hot enough for me”
Kelly: So I was jw if it was today
Gabe: well you can sw
Gabe: it’s too hot for me
Kelly: How are you otherwise?
Gabe: i think i’m ok?
Gabe: it’s hard to tell
Gabe: it’s literally too hot to tell
Kelly: I hear you
Gabe: how are you?
Kelly: Oh, fine. A little warmer than comfortable, but still riding the high of the new Fiona Apple album
Kelly: So life is mostly fine
Kelly: Except that legendary comedian Adam Carolla said a thing about women and now I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT SIDE IS UP ANYMORE

Gabe: YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!
Kelly: I CAN HANDLE BARELY ANYTHING AT ALL LET ALONE THE TRUTH
Kelly: First Christopher Hitchens says that women aren’t funny and now Adam Carolla
Kelly: It’s like ALL the great minds are against us
Gabe: well, the important thing is that we’re all talking about
Gabe: what adam corolla thinks
Gabe: about something
Gabe: get those ideas into the marketplace and hash them out!
Kelly: I just feel like Adam Carolla has been keeping his opinions to himself for such a long time that it’s nice that we can finally find out what goes on inside that brain
Kelly: Let us get at those thoughts, Adam Carolla!!!!!
Kelly: Tell us some other ones, you are so selfish with your thoughts, how can one man be so selfish with his thoughts that everyone wants to know?!!
Gabe: i feel like this argument would stop popping up
Gabe: if women were funny
Gabe: you know?
Gabe: we wouldn’t have to argue about whether or not women were funny
Gabe: if there were some funny women out there
Kelly: Occam’s razor
Kelly: It really would only take one funny woman to disprove the argument so yes, the fact that it hasn’t been disproven yet is a little telling
Kelly: A question I have is
Gabe: “are any women funny?”
Gabe: A: no
Kelly: hahah
Kelly: No. It’s what show does Adam Carolla have right now that he had to hire female writers to work on?
Gabe: who cares
Gabe: who cares what show adam corolla is doing right now PERIOD
Kelly: Very true
Kelly: It’s lucky for him that he has such inflammatory opinions about women
Kelly: Or it’s possible that no one would even be talking about him at all right now
Kelly: Not a definite, for sure
Kelly: But possible

Gabe: here is the thing: i don’t know why this is always such a big deal
Gabe: i mean, when some dumb old boor comes out of his cigar bar
Gabe: and says that women aren’t funny
Gabe: who gives a fuck?
Gabe: somehow i find all of the overwrought counter-arguments
Gabe: to be even more insufferable
Gabe: than the dumb thing the dumb dumb said
Kelly: The counter-arguments are difficult
Kelly: Because I’m not sure what else they could be other than like
Kelly: A list of names of funny women
Gabe: right
Gabe: which is very problematic
Kelly: Yeah. “Ok, so, here are five then.”
Gabe: well, the problem with a laundry list of funny women
Gabe: is that it actually gives credence to the original argument
Gabe: it meets the original argument on its own terms
Gabe: as opposed to just saying
Gabe: this is ridiculous and we don’t even need to talk about it
Kelly: Right
Kelly: The fact that it is the argument in the first place invalidates it
Gabe: i mean, the other problem is that the counter-arguments
Gabe: always come off as enraged and self-righteous
Gabe: and while this obviously makes sense
Gabe: because glaring and ignorant sexism/misogyny isn’t cool
Gabe: and stirs up a lot of very powerful and justifiable emotions
Gabe: but, you know, self-righteous fury ISN’T FUNNY
Gabe: there is that old quote
Gabe: about “living well is the best revenge”
Kelly: haha, there is that old quote
Gabe: and i feel like the best response to these things
Kelly: Sure
Gabe: is just to go be funny
Kelly: Right. But I don’t think a funny counter-argument would be any more effective than a non-funny counter-argument
Kelly: Just in that it is still saying
Kelly: “Look you’re wrong and here let me prove it to you”
Gabe: well, here’s the thing: if what he’s saying is false
Gabe: in the way that everyone thinks that it is
Gabe: like, just categorically undeniably wrong
Gabe: then there isn’t a counter-argument
Gabe: because what he’s positing isn’t a real argument
Gabe: in the first place
Gabe: admittedly, in this particular instance
Gabe: adam corrolla actually did bring up
Gabe: some other incendiary points
Gabe: about the merits of employeed female comedians

Kelly: Right. I feel like that is the main reason it is getting so much traction.
Gabe: like, in addition to saying that women weren’t funny
Gabe: he also said
Gabe: that any woman who makes her living by being funny
Gabe: is a scam
Gabe: which, i mean, must have hit pretty close to home for you
Gabe: since you know that you are just an affirmative action hire
Kelly: Yeah, but it didn’t hit close to home in a negative way.
Kelly: Just in a way that’s like
Kelly: “Yeah, it’s definitely a pretty good deal.”
Gabe: your dad sat you down
Gabe: and told you to get a job
Gabe: as a humor writer
Gabe: because you’re worthless
Gabe: i am pretty sure i’m remembering the adam corolla quote correctly
Kelly: Honestly, it’s just the easiest route if you’re mediocre at everything.
Kelly: And you know that they can’t really fire you anyway
Gabe: ugh don’t remind me
Kelly: So, as a women, you’d be foolish not to do it.
Gabe: you ladies are probably just mad because adam corolla won’t marry you and put a baby inside of you
Gabe: and also your periods
Kelly: It’s crazy how you are always so on point about women and why women are upset
Gabe: well i watched What Women Want in 2000
Gabe: and since then
Gabe: it’s been a breeze

Kelly: I think we’re also a little upset because Adam forced us to think of a world in which Joy Behar and Sherri Shepherd were not on TV
Gabe: haha
Kelly: Which is not a world we like to think about
Kelly: I’ll tell you that
Gabe: oh man, i forgot about that
Gabe: his two great examples
Gabe: on the hit comedy The View
Kelly: hahaha
Kelly: He is right though
Kelly: That if The View were full of men it probably wouldn’t be on TV
Kelly: +1 point for Adam Carolla
Gabe: but it would be funnier
Kelly: It would be funnier and it would do a lot more work.
Gabe: sliding doors, kelly, sliding doors

Comments (109)
  1. To be fair, it’s very difficult to find women funny when you don’t care what they have to say.

    • It is, however, very easy to make proclamations about what is and is not funny despite being a shitty has-been comedian that more people know from a sex advice radio show than anything that can actually be considered “comedy.”

  2. “I only read half of this conversation.” –Adam Corolla

  3. I just think it’s really surprising to hear this kind of thing from the former co-host of The Man Show.

  4. Well, yeah, remember SALAD?

  5. Um, why are Kelly and Gabe reading my chats with LBT on Tuesday afternoons?

  6. “Man, it was so easy to get a job, all I had to do was show up and say, ‘I’m a comedy writer’ and now I have a high-paying career in film and television comedy.” -no woman ever.

  7. Honestly…I’m surprised it took this long for Adam Carolla to get in hot water. He says pretty racist things on a regular basis. I was a huge Loveline fan…and thought I would give his podcast a shot when it came out. He mostly makes racist observations and complains about traffic now.

  8. I guess that explains why Alex Lane doesn’t like these friendly chats. Blame it on the Kelly factor.

  9. he is right. “the View” but-with-Men didn’t work on TV

  10. The problem with responding with a short list of very funny women is that short lists of very funny women are entirely consistent with this maggot’s turdy world view. Any sexist can acknowledge that Tina Fey is funny (and Carolla does, in this interview) and still be a raging sexist by pointing out that she is incredibly exceptional. Also, maybe we would have more women in comedy if the world of comedy weren’t quite so inclusive of men who make rape jokes?

    Sorry this isn’t funny. I can be a real humorless feminist bitch sometimes.

    • You’re probably on your period.

    • Conversely, maybe women comedians should make more rape jokes? No? Look, I’m just spitballing here.

      • Maybe we should just actually make them sandwiches? Based on the internet, I think just making a sandwich could remove the problem that creates 90 or so percent of male comedic material. Then we’re the funny ones!

        You guys all know, that really funny, not old or hackneyed joke. The one about sandwiches. You know? Aw, you bitches’ll get it eventually, keep thinking.

        • Are you talking about my favorite Jean Smart as an alcoholic neighbor in the Brady Bunch 2 line of all time:

          “Oooh, Brady Boys. Why don’t you come over here and help me make a sandwich…”

          Or actual sandwiches? I need clarification as I am a woman and therefore do not understand comedy… but I do love to cook! It’s wired into me like shopping and daydreaming about my future husband!

          • I would like to know too, because I love sandwiches.

          • Seriously tho, are there people who do not like sandwiches? Are sandwiches only a guy thing? Are men all Dagwood to women’s Blondie? I feel like Dave Chappelle contesting the stereotype of black folk loving fried chicken by asking who seriously doesn’t like fried chicken?

            Even if it’s not your favorite, are there any people that just flat out don’t like sandwiches of nay variety? How American, or ‘western hemisphere’ is it to like sandwiches? So many questions! I want answers!

          • Well considering the Earl of Sandwich was from England, I would say its appeal spreads far beyond that of our continent.

            Fun fact: Some of the best sandwiches I have ever eaten were made NOT in the U.S.

            Funner fact: Some of my best friends are sandwiches. I keep a photo of them in my wallet.

          • As in, “How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Hopefully none, that bitch should be making me a sandwich.”

            This and such:
            http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/make-me-a-sandwich-make-me-a-sammich

            Don’t worry baddiejeans, my boyfriend had to explain it to me. It’s pretty advanced stuff :(

    • “Tina Fey is funny for a girl” = the worst.

  11. Adam Carolla just used Sherri Shepard to prove that women aren’t funny. Someone should use Adam Carolla to prove to Sherri Shepard that dinosaurs do exist.

  12. Kelly is funny.

    Ergo women are funny.

    Case Closed.

  13. You tell me that’s not funny.

  14. Jen Kirkman has a great bit on her album ‘Hail To the Freaks’ where she talks about trying to reconnect with religion only to be thwarted by the machinations of a male-dominated society. The track is called ‘Uncommitted Atheist.’

    And so I did try and go to this kind of liberal christian church for a little while, and I remember I was at this meeting, and this kind of weird homeless guy looked at me and he goes,”What’s your number?” And I thought there was a raffle, I’m like, “Oh, I don’t have a number, I don’t know what the-” and he’s like “What’s your PHONE number. You seem cool.” And I’m like “Are you hitting on me? I’m trying to go to like a church thing.” And then I’m like, you know what? Fuck this! I can’t do religion. Jesus had a penis, and that’s the difference. THAT’S the difference. No one was trying to rape him, you know what I mean? Why should I follow Jesus’s message? I can’t do what he did. Can you imagine me with a bunch of leper dudes, and I’m like, “Hey,” and I’m rubbing them and I’m like, “You can see!” and they’re just like, “What’re you doin’ later?” “NO! NOOO-OH! NO! You couldn’t see! I’m helping with the seeing!” “Why are you such a bitch, just ‘cuz my skin’s falling off? You’re not so great, stupid whore…” And if I’m on the cross with no shirt on, are you kidding me? People’re gonna be like, “Show us your tits!” “I AM showing you. I’m trying to do a thing here that’s going to- you know what? I’m getting down. Forget it. You can’t handle it.”

    Anyway. Adam Carolla is like that leper Jen Kirkman was talking about.

  15. Is this Adam Corolla’s version of The Game ? Is he just negging all women in hopes of casting a wide net to get laid? I can’t wait to see him peacock!

  16. so Christopher Hitchens, and now Adam Carolla. so that’s it, ladies. you’ve been told twice.

  17. Everyone knows that all female comedians are just dudes in drag, thanks for letting the sheeple know Work It

  18. “There is a reason they’re called fun bags and not funny bags.” — a young Adam Corolla works on his stand up.

  19. It’s kinda weird how this controversy coincides with the release of his new book!

  20. You guys, have you heard about this movie, Safety Not Guaranteed? Apparently Aubrey Plaza is in it? She’s funny.

  21. “I definitely have a leg to stand on in this debate.” -Adam Carolla

  22. Agelover -★.☆CO-M. For younger women and older men,or older women and younger men, where u can find your soulmate or sexual partner who can pay all your needs, and Age is no problem, everything is possible!

  23. Gabe: haha
    What a polite and proper laugh you have Gabe, just well measured and restrained, befitting a prim young gentleman!

  24. Personally I am glad that this guy I have never heard of has THE BALLS to say the truth.Now who will have the courage to point out that women can’t swim?

  25. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

    • Ah yes, the “basic statistics” of who is and is not funny, which are universally agreed upon. I could see saying that there are fewer women in comedy… it is kind of a boys club of an industry and I can definitely see where women would be less likely to put up with a life of touring around the country to shitty dive bars to perform for drunken dudes yelling “Take off your shirt!” through their whole set.

      However, that doesn’t mean they aren’t funny. There’s a whole lot of extra barriers that female comedians have to get past and deal with that aren’t really an issue for men (as is the case in basically every male-dominated vocation).

      But whether or not someone is funny is such a subjective opinion that calling any group (in this case, a group consisting of 51% of the world’s population) objectively funny or not funny is completely meaningless and disingenuous. You might as well say Jewish men aren’t funny, seeing as only a very small percentage of the total population of Jewish men are successful comedians.

      • Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

        • I know the argument about Jewish comedians doesn’t make sense, that was the point.

          • Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

          • It makes no sense to claim that any group is categorically good at any learned skill (such as comedy writing), and statistical evidence has nothing to do with completely subjective opinions such as what is or is not funny. That’s what I was trying to get at. Also, you are a doody-head.

        • Second point: No one is saying they aren’t funny. That point has not been made once.

          Except of course that that is literally exactly what Adam Carolla said. Apparently, men have poor reading comprehension! And that’s a fact! Statistics, etc.

          • “No. But they make you hire a certain number of chicks, and they’re always the least funny on the writing staff. The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.”

            You do understand that the quote above is “literally” not “literally exactly” what he said, right? Being less funny than men != not funny. It’s still not a very nice thing to say, but holy shit people. Read.

        • “Right or wrong, this is the world we live in.”

          When will people (IDIOTS) stop using this argument. If the world we live in is corrupt and unjust then obviously we should be trying to fix it rather than just shrugging and ignoring the problem.

          • It’s not an argument. It’s the recognition that it is a different point than the one being made in this article. Are women less funny than men on average? Yeah, probably. Are there a number of good and bad reasons for it? Yes. The argument is the first point, not the second one. No one is arguing against the second one.

    • Ah, a fact? Then I presume you will provide us with the evidence to support these claims.

      • You wouldn’t understand with your more empathetic female mind. Only men who are more rooted in logic can understand basic statistics.

        • I’m being super irrational about this… mostly because the shoes I want aren’t in my size. But I bought them anyway because COME ON, they were on sale. Kind of angry now.

          • As someone getting a degree in stats, I have taken more than just basic stats. And stats don’t come out of people’s asses.

          • Congratulations. So I would hope you would be able to understand that you can use a statistical concept, and a very basic one at that, such as speaking about things on average, without actually conducting a survey and necessitating raw data. On average, generally speaking, women are not as funny as men. I don’t think this is a very contentious issue with people who aren’t wildly sensitive, self righteous, and politically correct. It’s anecdotal, of course, but it shouldn’t be that hard of a concept to grasp.

            Other breakthroughs: Cats are not as social as dogs, European people like to smoke, and men are better athletes than women. I don’t have any spreadsheets or bibliographies on hand, but I’m confident my points still hold true in general.

  26. On a serious note, why is he still around?

  27. i think i should start giving interviews to share my experience with the white, american male. you know, all white males cry after sex. the majority of white males are incapable of giving me an orgasm. american men don’t know how to eat pussy. that sort of thing. if that’s my experience it has to be universally true, right?

  28. oh man, you guys, I don’t comment on blogs usually but I always read videogum comments cause you guys are the best. I wrote a post about this topic on another blog not because Adam Carolla got to me but because I’ve heard it so many times before from other men. It actually got into my head when I was younger… not just that men were funnier, but stronger creatives… and I wasted a lot of years deferring to the group of men in the room, even when I had a strong opinion about a creative change, only to find that my gut instinct was right and the project would have worked out better if I had stuck to my guns. I don’t do that these days cause I am a professional and, much like bronchitis, ain’t nobody got time for that. But so I channeled my younger self and wrote a post about how women should keep doing what their doing, trust their gut sense of humor and don’t worry about some douche who tells you women aren’t as funny (making you feel pressure to prove something).

    I got some responses from women who don’t think other women are funny and it made me really sad and in the end… God Damn Adam Carolla got to me!!! CAROLLA!!!

  29. also, it became really clear to me in college how easy a career in comedy would be as a woman. i’d be auditioning for a comedy with, i don’t know, 45 other girls who looked just like me when i’d see the stage manager run out of the room to wake up the boy from the technical theatre department. She’d beg him to pretty please come audition because the only other boys there were the obese english majors who showed up drunk and would inexplicably accuse you of looking at them while they changed in the dressing room. uh oh! bitter woman alert! on a side note, i was recently voted funniest member of my family BY MY MOM! so take that, adam.

  30. I don’t get it. Vaginas are the funniest looking things EVER.

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