To celebrate 100 years of stuff, Paramount got 116 people together, which doesn’t really seem to make that much sense, like you just HAD to include Johnny Noxville apparently, but it’s their party so just be happy for them, for a big group photo. Aww! Everyone looks like they’re having a great time. Ed Harris is thrilled to be a part of it! On the one hand, it’s impressive that they got so many celebs in one place at one time and on the other hand it’s so unusual to have so many celebs in one place at one time that it looks fake. If Lee Harvey Oswald had really showed up for this photo then how come his shadow is whatever? In any case, this week we’re going to do things a little differently. There can only be one caption comment per person in the photo. (If we get through all 116 people then you can start over again, BUT NOT UNTIL THEN BECAUSE MOM SAYS.) Click the photo to enlarge or visit Vanity Fair for a flashy version. Read other people’s comments first to make sure you’re not doubling up. WE DON’T NEED TWO DIFFERENT JOKES ABOUT WHAT JULIANNE HOUGH IS SAYING. Comment early to poke fun at your fave celebs!

Winner will receive special mention in this week’s Monsters’ Ball. THE COMMENT STAYS IN THE PICTURE!

Comments (118)
  1. Meanwhile, some people have to beg for even ONE person to help them celebrate turning 100.

  2. Am I the only one who thinks that Kevin Costner looks like he has a little John Travolta in him?

  3. “How am I still alive?” -Bud Cort

  4. I have nothing clever to add, I just want to get the Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu comment out of the way.

  5. “And I thought I was the jackass, GABE!” – Johnny Knoxville

  6. Seriously BIEBER !!!! Get out now

  7. 116 pairs of $116 underpants.

  8. Stupid Vanity Fair misspelled “Jeff Goldblum.”

  9. Someone photoshop Michael Cera in there.

  10. Meryl Streep farted.

  11. Dakota Fanning is trying to escape from George Clooney.

  12. What a strange-looking pile of cocaine.

  13. Less like Robert Downer Jr.

  14. ” “-Marlee Matlin

  15. Robert Evans, Ali MacGraw AND Patton Oswalt?! Is that even allowed?

  16. Paramount advertises Untitled Star Trek sequel (2013); others also show up.

  17. “They told me if I posed for this picture I could use the sink to bathe”

  18. Natalie Portman’s caption reads “Future bride of Steve Winwood.”

  19. Simon Pegg looks almost TOO excited to be seated next to Jon Cryer.

  20. David Lynch : “Who Farted?”

  21. The weirdest advent calendar ever for some unknown, secret cult holiday.

  22. Simon Pegg looks really annoyed with Peter Bogdanovich.

  23. So it’s like Girls, but about a movie production company?

  24. One of us! One of us! Gooble-gobble, gooble-gobble! One of us! One of us! Gooble-gobble, gooble-gobble! One of us! One of us! Gooble-gobble, gooble-gobble!

  25. special thanks go out to Gary Oldman for putting it all together.

  26. I just drifted off for 5 minutes imagining a cage match between Ben Kingsley and Patrick Stewart.

  27. “What is happening?” -Kirk Douglas


  28. why is no one standing near walberg?

  29. need to see that return of the jedi final shot photoshop remix with big bird and jar jar photoshopped in to it with yoda, obi wan and annikan skywalker etc. you know the one I’m talking about it was a viral meme in 2005

  30. give me the “John Lennon”

    Barbara Streisand to her Stylist

  31. Have you tried Activia?

    -Jamie Lee Curtis

  32. OK, be honest, how many of you saw this guy and immediately recognized him as the owner of BET?

  33. Wow, say what you will about CHESS: THE MOVIE, but they really put together quite a cast.

  34. Dear Paramount Pictures,

    A little birdy came and told me it was your birthday.
    DUDE! Happy Friggin’ Birthday!

    (with) Mad Love,
    Charlize Theron

  35. “Come on, not even a little Sinatara?”
    Nick Nolte

  36. you think the photographer tried to pose robert de niro and get him to smile? and in response robert de niro said you talkin’ to me? and everybody cheered and high-fived because they got to witness it and started doing de niro impressions, which are always terrible and as robert de niro looked around, at all of them, he died a little inside and made his classic robert de niro face because he knew the risks, he didn’t have to be there. and the photographer started crying because it was so beautiful and decided to capture him sitting there making that face forever?

  37. I would just like to point out that this post is tagged solely as “Leonardo DiCaprio”.

  38. Karl Urban: “Who am I again?”

  39. Wow, Jamie Lee Curtis looks incredible, even next to Megan Fox. I wish I could have done her in Trading Places.

  40. “So when Rayanne Graff told me my hair was holding me back, I had to listen. ‘Cause she wasn’t just talking about my hair. She was talking about my life.”

  41. “‘Last 48 Hours’ stands out as the saddest installation of this buddy-cop series yet” – Variety

  42. “Dignified and inconspicuous.” – Sacha Baron Cohen

  43. Robert De Niro: I’ve made a huge mistake.

    Simon Pegg: Ekatsim eguh a edam Ev’i.

    (because they’re wearing the exact same expression but flipped, like in a mirror… this is pretty complicated for a super dumb joke)

  44. Not Pictured: Travolta’s masseuse and Cruise’s actual height.

  45. “We are the 1% (but don’t want to admit it)” – Everyone.

  46. Is Don Cheadle a tiny man or is this the worst photoshop of all time?

    • Totally! Why is his head so SMALL?

    • Several of them look pretty obviously Photoshopped in. Don Cheadle, Peter Bogdanovich (and/or Emile Hirsch), Cameron Diaz, Alejandro Gonzalez Innaritu, Johnny Noxville and probably others don’t look quite right for their depth/perspective, and you can see blurring on the edges where they intersect with other people.

      Cameron Diaz looks like her elbow would be inside Nick Nolte’s face if she were actually standing in that position.

  47. Nice to see Katie Featherston finally participating in some NORMAL Activity!*

    • *I know everyone was staring expectantly into the black space of the internet as you heard the ominous beats on my keyboard getting closer and closer to that much-anticipated Katie Featherston joke, and then you all totally jumped and screamed when it finally hit the comments, except for those of you who had been covering your eyes the whole time and just pretended to be scared when everyone else screamed, although you didn’t really know why and were kind of glad you didn’t know why, because nightmares.

  48. “I’M A MONSTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
    - Olivia Newton-John

  49. I came to this late but I just wanna say that these are some of the funniest captions I’ve seen on this feature. Good job, y’all, you deserve your own elaborate Vanity Fair photo shoot.

  50. And the rest of the celebrities to die in the “Summer of Death 2012″ were…

  51. ELLE FANNING ???
    WTF ???
    Was Ali Lohan not available ?

  52. Serious question: why does Ben Kingsley get his “sir”, but Patrick Stewart doesn’t? Is he too freshly knighted?

  53. Where are the holograms of dead celebs?

  54. “That’s you, drops of water and you’re on top of the mountain of success. But one day you start sliding down the mountain and you think wait a minute; I’m a mountain top water drop.”

    - Edward James Olmos to Shia LaBeouf upon hearing he is retiring from acting forever

  55. Morgan Freeman has one white hand.

  56. Related: Morgan Freeman has one black hand.

  57. “Don’t feel bad, even I don’t know who I am.” – Katie Featherston

  58. “We are all very clearly in the same room at the same time.” – Anna Kendrick

  59. What everyone is simultaneously thinking:
    “I can’t believe I’m in the same room as Rosie Huntington-Whitely!!!”

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