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Kanye West is on the cover of Details magazine this month.
Blah blah, OK, you’re Nike. No you’re not. But this video pales in comparison to the full-scale bonkerz that is the actual article, which includes gems like:
“”First beat I did,” he recalls, “was in seventh grade, on my computer. I got into doing beats for the video games I used to try to make. My game was very sexual. The main character was, like, a giant penis. It was like Mario Brothers, but the ghosts were, like, vaginas.”
Wait, what? It was like Mario Brothers but the ghosts were vaginas? So the vaginas followed you if you had your back turned and the only way you could get them to leave you alone was to face them, but if they touched you you died? Or is he getting the ghosts confused with Goombas? So you were a giant penis who jumped on vaginas and crushed them because you hate vaginas? Fun game, weirdo.
This is also great:
“Titles are very important. I like to embody titles, y’know, or words that have negative connotations, and explain why that’s good,” he says. “Take the word gay–like, in hip-hop, that’s a negative thing, right? But in the past two, three years, all the gay people I’ve encountered have been, like, really, really, extremely dope. Y’know, I haven’t, like, gone to a gay bar, nor do I ever plan to. But where I would talk to a gay person–the conversation would be mostly around, like, art or design–it’d be really dope. From a design standpoint, kids’ll say, ‘Dude, those pants are gay.’ But if it’s, like, good, good, good fashion-level, design-level stuff, where it’s on a higher level than the average commercial design stuff, it’s, like, gay people that do that. I think that should be said as a compliment. Like, ‘Dude, that’s so good it’s almost . . . gay.’”
First of all, I’d just like to point out that this entire quote is in reference to his “interior decorator/apartment manager.” Which is fair. Every time I talk to my interior decorator/apartment manager it sends me off on a completely irrelevant monologue that sounds like a coded cry of freedom.
Now that I’ve pointed that out, we can all have so many laughs at this. “You’ve met gay people? Like at a gay bar?” “No way, dude, not at a gay bar, I’d never go to a gay bar ever. You’ve got to be kidding me. A gay bar? Come on!” “Well then how else on Earth could you, an internationally successful recording artist with houses in New York and LA have possibly met a gay person? Something doesn’t sound right.” “I know it sounds crazy, but you have to believe me when I tell you that I met gay people but that I also never went to a gay bar.” “Impossible.” “Well, let’s just at least be clear that whether or not I’ve ever met gay people, I didn’t go to a gay bar, just in case you were thinking that I went to a gay bar, even though nothing I’ve said suggests that I’ve been to a gay bar necessarily, and actually I’m just kind of sounding inexplicably paranoid and like a lady who doth protest too much.” Pause.
Doctor, more medicine!
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If I have my way, Pause will be the new nullus, that is, in my sphere of influence. Me.
Isn’t pause the old nullus?
Also Murakami is for children.
i don’t get it. what’s the problem?
Kanye is a homosexual.
From a video game-standpoint I would like to point out that he is probably confusing Mario Bros. with Pacman?
»Titles are very important. I like to embody titles« because they are DELICIOUS? Pretty sure he met his interior decorator/apartment manager at an after show party at the MANHOLE in West Hollywood.
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I hope Kanye finds this during his daily Google search for himself and writes a blog post — “WHY CAN’T YOU LET ME BE GREAT?!?!?!?!!? PART 2″
Why don’t you try making four beats a day for three summers?
Wow kanye, thats really cool, i mean, gay (because gay is something you say instead of cool, because gay people are cool, so by extension, calling things gay means calling them cool. i like them, honestly. you guys get it?)
GAY Plus! Would read again!
THIS IS SOME BENJAMIN BUTTON’S SHIT!!1!
LOL!!1
(Theme Music for Kanye’s Game)
Penis Walks
God show me the way cause them pussies trying to break me down
Penis Walks (with me with me with me)
The only thing I pray is that my dick don’t fail me now.
I want to to get it hard but I’m afraid because it’s been so long.
So long.
is this going to be forever?
“That bear was kinda…Murakami-ish” omg, AND he knows art.
But he’s so right, I’ve noticed this inexplicable trend of all the gay people in the past few years being really really extremely dope. It’s so weird.
I’m not a huge Kanye-as-a-person fan, but all of these quotes are fairly reasonable.
When i was in grade 7 i made a comic called “Dragonball P” about my asian friend who got made fun of for wetting the bed (he didn’t wet the bed.) What i mean is, when you’re that age the lowest common denominator of everything is hilarious. Pee, Penis/Vagina, Crackwhore. That shit is comedy gold at that age.
And i don’t think there’s a person in here that wouldn’t LOVE to crush walking vaginas with a giant penis in a video game.
Clearly, Kanye IS YOUR BOYFRIEND! Which is sad for me because after reading that, I am now completely in love with him.
My new dream is to see Kanye team up with Gary Busey for some kind of reality-show life-coaching gig, where they can run around dispensing wisdom and guidance…and makeovers.
i’ll take arrogant joking kanye instead of heartbroken evil despot kanye. But kanye aint no revolutionary. his gay love is based on “hey u add to me enjoying the world, thanks for helping kanye you’re welcome i’m your savior”
which is hilarious because he believes it.
bong bong!
Maybe he should get together with Hilary Duff and come out with a new PSA.
he needs to spend some time with robert duvall in the thx 1138 prison.
you’re right- he IS a bit of a tool.
The game is called Nuts and Milk, and he’s wrong: you play a penis, pause, trying to reunite with a pair of breasts. It’s more like Donkey Kong than Mario. It’s also only fun for 3 minutes.
reunite? so it’s about a transvestite?
if gay means dope then kanye means used to be cool but currently sucks
Gone
“You know how gay is a hip-hop term that I had originally invented to quantify whackness? Well, I’m going to be appearing on Ellen again this week to talk to my fans, my base, and that’s going to be so good, it’ll be the other kind of gay. The new kind of gay. That I just invented.”
Really Kanye? “Burn After Reading” and “Step Brothers” are your go-to movies?
What is so crazy about any of this?