Alf! AND NOW THIS! Throw on your stupid slap bracelets and prepare to never grow up. (Please grow up.) Someone interviewed Dante Basco, who played Rufio in 1991′s Hook, and asked him if people still care about Rufio (A: “care” is a strong word) to which he responded:

Actually there’s a film in development, the Rufio film, where a hotshot group of kids from the East Coast graduated and they wrote this whole script, the prequel to Hook and it’s the Rufio story. We have it right now with a director, Rpin Suwannath who’s doing the new Zorro for Fox. He has the script and he’s attached to the film and I’m attached to produce so that’s actually in development right now which’ll be cool, a Rufio for a whole new generation.

DETONATE THE INTERNET. Rarely has a story so inconsequential gotten so much attention. Just kidding. Every inconsequential story gets at least this much attention because that’s how Al Gore invented it. But, obviously this is not really happening. So sorry Dante Brasco! (Although I would definitely see a movie called Dante Brasco about Rufio infiltrating one of the five syndicated crime families.) But who are some other 1990s side characters who will definitely never get their very own movie projects but should at least get 12 hours of Blog Buzz? My vote, obviously, goes to a psycho-sexual thriller directed by Brian DePalma called Fuller, Take It Easy On The Prostitutes.

Comments (68)
  1. “D’you know that bees and dogs can smell fear? I can smell fear too…because I’m RAY BOYD: ASSASSIN FOR HIRE. If you show me the money, I’ll get you a human brain—all eight pounds.”

  2. Ummm, OBVIOUSLY the rapper who was topped by Teen Witch.

  3. Brian Krakow.

  4. Frasier Crane.

  5. Newman: The Movie

  6. The drug dealer in Go who was the most real person there.

  7. Salem from Sabrina and that other talking cat from Hocus Pocus in The Great Catsby.

  8. Max the magician/waiter from The Max from Saved by the Bell

  9. I’d pay monies to see an alternate Silence of the Lambs sequel/spinoff involving Miggs, called “Tossin’ One Off (in Heaven)”

  10. Jessie Camp.

  11. I’m pitching my script, Whoa!: The Early Triumphs of the Guy Who Said That in Blossom.

    If you don’t like it, I also have some Oscar bait here called Sh@t My Dad Says: The Holocaust Years.

  12. I want to see a sitcom about the kidnappers from 3 Ninjas.

  13. I’d like to see a what the tertiary characters from that 90s show, 2 Broke Girls, are up to.

  14. The greased-up saxophone guy from Lost Boys, please!

  15. I would seriously watch a spinoff involving pretty much any of the supporting characters from Big Lebowski (e.g. Steve Buschemi, John Goodman, Julianne Moore), but if we’re sticking to tertiary characters, I think my top 5 would look like this:
    1. Brandt (Phillip Seymour Hoffman)
    2. Marty (Lebowski’s landlord)
    3. Jesus (obviously)
    4. Maude Lebowski’s giggling bald friend
    5. The Nihilists

    • John Turturro has actually shown interest in doing a spin-off movie about The Jesus. And Tara Reid is convinced that they’re making a sequel, and she is going to be in it. Nobody else seems to know anything about that, though, so she MIGHT not be a reliable source.

  16. The “Klepto Kid” from Can’t Hardly Wait

  17. Rex Manning from Empire Records

  18. All the upvotes because you agree!

  19. Log Lady
    Aunt Viv
    The Mad About You Dog

  20. The kid from Hang Time who tried pot and forgot to fix his friend’s motorcycle… which led to a terrible crash, missing the big game and lessons learned by all.

  21. David Silver’s idiot blonde friend that shot himself by accident. And he is a ghost, forever haunting the halls of West Beverly High.

    • I’m sending you my specs. I want to write for this show. I want to write for all 14 seasons of it. What is it called? How about: The Never Graduate.

      • I *would* hire you, but after the Small Wonder incident of an hour ago, I honestly don’t know if you have what it takes.

        • “He’s an utter delight with a history of posting ghost-related comments, at least once about two months ago and then just now; she’s a grudge-holding former child star who played a robot in the worst sitcom in American history. Will they make it work? Or will they be… Bitter Frenemies.” Mondays on ABC at 8:30.

  22. Parker Lewis Can’t Lose! Obviously!

  23. I want a prequel where we learn about shrimp (and life) from Bubba

  24. Mr. Pink: the Early Years

  25. from married w/ children: psycho dad the movie

  26. A giant ham from Supermarket Sweep.

  27. E Ray from ER

  28. Kit De Luca – The Beauty School Years.

  29. David Faustino reprises his role as Bud Bundy in “Pimpin’ it – Bundy Style”

  30. 56 comments on an ALF article and 63 on a Rufio article. I guess my town isn’t the only place where the weather sucks.

    But that Dante Brasco idea is genius. Some dude named Virgil shows up and says he’s a friend of Beatrice (a dancer at a mafia-owned strip joint called The Inferno and the only woman Dante ever loved… she took his innocence, man) and she’s gone missing. The only person who can infiltrate the criminal underworld and find out what happened to her is Master Impersonator Dante Brasco! It writes itself.

  31. Wrong decade, but I’d pay cash money to see The Scut Farkus Story.

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