Did everyone have a wonderful Easter celebration yesterday, if you are a Christian or a non-religious person who just enjoys celebrations and it doesn’t really care if they’re based in religion? Because you only live once and you only get so many holidays and you might as well celebrate them when you can because it’s fun? Did you participate in the standard “buying a ham kind of late in the day and watching Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist on TV, first because it was kind of a silly thing to have on in the background while cooking, and then later because you found yourself on the couch watching it and not actually doing anything else”? I assume all of your answers are yes. Perfect! I’m glad you all had such a nice day — unlike the children in this clip, who got a terrifying Easter surprise from a local newscaster. Please make sure all children and young animals are out of the room before watching this clip, and please cover your own eyes, and please MIB neuralyzer yourself right after you see it.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo! You’ve ruined the ability of those children to believe in the life behind the eyes of a dirty old single-expression bunny suit, YOU MONSTER! How dare you? Please sign my petition to have this man fired from his news station, just kidding, you can’t do that because you don’t know what I’m talking about because you’ve already MIB neuralyzied yourself. (Thanks for the tip, Gideon!)

Comments (25)
  1. At least kids can still believe in this guy:

  2. Was that an alternate ending for Donnie Darko?

  3. Was that an alternate Donnie Darko ending?

  4. The good guys dress in black remember that. Just in case we ever face to face and make contact. The title held by me M.I.B. Means what you think you saw, you did not see.

    • Tru dat, why you do that? I try and be a tough dad, but you keep making me laugh.

      I say this Will Smith lyric all the time to people. They love it.

      • I don’t quote his lyrics, but I DO use the same slang he used in Fresh Prnice. Nothing will melt a lady’s undergarments faster then calling her a “no-nonsense kind of slimmie.”

  5. I don’t think this is too terrifying for kids. They all have Hunger Games after all.

  6. I celebrated Easter the way I always do – by eating more kielbasa and pierogies in one day than the surgeon general recommends for a year.

  7. My mother-in-law owned a restaurant and would wear an Easter Bunny costume every year to entertain the kids. Last year, when my wife and I went over for dinner, I found the bunny head and wore it while I got drunk on martinis.

    We weren’t invited back this year.

  8. I don’t know, have kids ever actually believed those people in costumes were the Easter Bunny/Santa Claus/Batman etc.? I never did but I’ve always been kind of glum.

  9. went to my aunt’s house yesterday. as a four year old guest went hunting for easter eggs in the back yard, my high-school age cousin found 4 dead baby rabbits in the yard. and being a high school-aged boy, lacked the tact to not mention what he found in front of the toddler.

    THAT is a ruined Easter.

  10. I watched passion of the Christ and then went around the Upper West Side yelling all the Jews for killing my savior so that my sins could be cleansed for all eternity.

  11. Oh God!! I would just be mildly amused by this except my neice and nephew cornered me when their parents were off somewhere else in the house.

    “Uncle Pete! Is the Easter Bunny just Mom and Dad and Santa Clause and the Tooth Fairy too?”

    I swear!!! I’m all, “uuuuuuuuuhhhhh, what does your Mom say? Whatever they say is true, I don’t know!”

    “Oohh, so ’cause you don’t have kids (thanks for the dig buddy) you don’t know anything about Santa and the Easter Bunny.”

    “Sure, yeah just don’t ask me stuff like that.”

    • Shit! I know I misspelled niece.

      Also, am I the only one that is creeped out by being called “Uncle” or “Aunt” whatever your name is? I didn’t mind so much until all my nephews’ friends started calling me Uncle Pete too. eeewwww!!! I tell them just to call me by my name but their parents insist on adding the Uncle. They do the same thing with the Gparents. The dang kids have to add Pappa or Mimi to everything even my Mom and Step-Dad chose their GP names expressly to avoid that.

      Off topic I know but whatevs

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