james_franco_spring_break

This is a picture of James Franco on the set of a new Harmony Korine movie about spring break called Spring Breakers. (“We want the title to be on the nose, but not TOO on the nose.” – Harbody Kerhan.) WELL, LADIES, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT YOUR WONDERFUL BOYFRIEND NOW? Still great? Fair enough. Naturally, the would-be rap star Riff Raff from the short-lived Vh1 series, From G’s to Gents, says that James Franco is playing him. Sure, Riff Raff. That’s almost definitely true. For one thing, it sure SOUNDS true. And for another thing, since you yourself aren’t a ridiculous, self-delusional, comical parody of what a meth-faced Kevin Federline in a Tweetie Bird hat in a Die Antwoord spoof on MadTV would be like in the first place, there is no way for anyone to have come up with the idea of putting corn rows in their hair and making a fool on stage but to have ripped it from YOUR headlines. But seriously, ladies. Ladies! Look at your boy. Hot stuff. I’m not sure where he even found time to get his hair braided since his book of free verse poetry about different soups he’s eaten is due to his publisher before his next lecture on the semiotics of James Franco, but I guess he squeezed it in during his dissertation defense. The point is congrats ladies. You are so lucky to be physically intimate with this guy and also be married to him. “It’s crazy how much money we save on laundry ever since he threw all his shirts away.” XOXOXO 4EVER. (Via Celebitchy. Click through to enlarge.)

Comments (22)
  1. Everything Gabe wrote is correct. Everything.

  2. My boyfriend is cool as ice.

  3. James Francorn Rows.*

    *Doesn’t get much better than this comment. Take the rest of the afternoon off everyone!

  4. He’s still here?

  5. Harmony will never do better than this:

  6. Obligatory! Obligatory!

  7. Andy Serkis is in the background playing Ho #2

  8. You know, I would write this off as bullshit for any filmmaker, but I could definitely see Harmony Korine basing a character around Riff Raff. Riff Raff has stayed “internet famous” wih videos on WSHH since from G’s to Gents, he’s actually pretty fucking funny.

  9. My flow’s so fluid make you cry
    Won’t stop rapping ’til I die
    Humiliating other rappers by
    Freshly baked tastes of So Good Pie!

    • they call me professor J
      and i’m yo teacher today
      making art in an awful way

      yea i sleep in class
      but i still gon’ pass
      with a pair of CK’s on my ass

      i make yo spidey sense tingle
      wheneva we mingle
      i’m so money i make married girls single!

  10. wow. his right arm grew back?

  11. I keep hearing about the Riff Raff thing and thinking that everyone means an entirely different Riff Raff and I think I would like to see that more, honestly

  12. I think the real question is why the hell are we still letting Harmony Korine make movies?

  13. Thank you, Gabe. For today you reminded me that Kevin Federline exists, and I was saddened momentarily, before I remembered that I don’t care about his existence.

  14. How do you think it feels to be told you’re dumb when you’re 11 years old!

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