They say that you never know what the future holds, and it’s really true. An entire life can change in an instant. Life is what happens when you’re busy posting Instagrams, or whatever. But on an even grander scale, one morning, a world faced with daunting challenges can wake up to discover that all of its problems have been solved by one casually racist casino magnate whose cousin Stan, I don’t know, something about a website? The point is, it’s fixed. All of it. Thanks, Stan and A. Samuels. American heroes. (Via Gawker.)

Previously: A. Samuels Is Livin’ De Life.

Comments (19)
  1. My favorite founding father is Abraham Lincoln.

  2. woulda man with such a crazy cool fedora / post a 3 minute video just to bore ya? / who’s the man with the master plan? / who’s the man with the master plan?

  3. Stan is the best hype-man since Spliff Star.

  4. Whose the man, with the master plan? Dropping kick-ass fonts like Comic Sans!

  5. You know the economy has hit rock bottom when our nation’s hot reporters can’t even afford glass for their fake glasses:

  6. fuck it, i’m burning this ridiculous economic development thesis i am working on and i am just going to submit this video to my committee. A++++ for me!

  7. It’s so much easier to rap sleeveless in the studio! – Rappers

  8. I +1′d this.

  9. I watched this entire video and I’m convinced Stan does not actually have an economic plan for America. I think the only plan he maybe has is a vague hope that people will confuse him for Ron Paul.

  10. A Samuels says what?

  11. I cannot listen to this guy, without thinking of this guy…

  12. I seem to recall that guy getting killed toward the end of “Ghost Dog.” (No spoiler alert, because of course you’ve seen “Ghost Dog.”) He had the titular line in response to the question, “Are you the guy who will eventually bring us the website”

    “I will be dead soon. You’re thinking of my ghost, dog.”

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