Kelly: Hey, Gabe
Gabe: hey kelly
Gabe: wazzzzzuuuuuuuuuuuuup?
Gabe: it’s nice to know that still in there, you know?
Gabe: rattling around?
Gabe: good job, brain.
Kelly: Life is brevia art is longia
Kelly: So Kim Kardashian and Jon Hamm are in a fight, Gabe
Gabe: oh no!
Gabe: the honeymoon is over
Gabe: between Jon Hamm and Kim Kardashian
Kelly: Their peaceful relationship always seemed too good to be true
Gabe: what happened?
Gabe: how did it all fall apart?
Gabe: where did they go wrong?
Kelly: Last week or something Jon Hamm called Kim Kardashian, along with Paris Hilton and THOSE types, an “idiot” in Elle UK magazine
Kelly: And Kim Kardashian had someone read it to her I guess

Gabe: boom
Kelly: I’m a regular Jon Hamm
Gabe: oof
Gabe: boo
Gabe: log off
Kelly: Thank you and goodnight!
Gabe: log off the chat

Kelly Conaboy disconnects

Gabe: better

Kelly Conaboy connects

Gabe: so jon hamm called kim a “fucking idiot”
Gabe: that seems fair
Gabe: i feel like that’s fair
Gabe: and then what did kim say?
Kelly: Kim said that she thought it was careless to call someone stupid who
Kelly: “runs their own businesses, is part of a successful TV show, produces, writes, designs and creates”
Gabe: haha, “careless”
Kelly: He should have read her wikipedia maybe
Kelly: She CREATES!
Gabe: is it “careless”?
Gabe: is the word you would use to describe this situation “careless”?
Kelly: It is not the word I’d choose
Gabe: what is with women like kim kardashian and paris hilton always talking about
Gabe: running their own business?
Gabe: as if
Kelly: As if is right
Gabe: none of us could ever possibly even know what that means
Gabe: and so we just have to take their word for it
Gabe: oh, ok, you definitely run a business
Gabe: because of how you said so
Kelly: Yeah
Kelly: I’m sure they do think that they’re running their own business though
Gabe: right

Gabe: it’s not so much that they are pulling anything over on us
Gabe: as much as they just don’t actually know themselves what they are tlaking about
Kelly: Yeah
Kelly: Giving us a peek at their delusion
Gabe: i also like that she cites being on a reality TV show that is absolute garbage
Gabe: as some kind of accomplishment
Kelly: Right
Gabe: she is PART of a SHOW
Kelly: “Being a fucking idiot has made me incredibly successful”
Gabe: don’t be careless
Gabe: she actually kind of backs up his claim
Gabe: by listing
Gabe: all of the ways in which she has been generously rewarded
Gabe: for being a fucking idiot
Kelly: Yeah
Gabe: right? isn’t that kind of his point?
Gabe: that if you’re a fucking idiot
Gabe: you get to tell people that you design and are part of a show
Gabe: and run your own business
Kelly: Yes
Kelly: If you’re a successful enough fucking idiot
Kelly: You can list all sorts of things that you do
Kelly: And everyone just has to shrug in response
Kelly: It’s funny when people like Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton say things like
Kelly: Oh yeah, you think a fucking idiot could have gotten so much success from being a fucking idiot?
Kelly: As if their success in ACTING like a fucking idiot
Kelly: Proves that they are not a fucking idiot
Gabe: it’s confusing why they think they need to defend it
Gabe: that’s never stopped her
Gabe: before
Gabe: so why does she care?
Gabe: she should just be like YUP

Kelly: Hahaha
Gabe: it’s funny that these ladies don’t have enough self-awareness
Gabe: to not act like fucking idiots
Gabe: in every moment of their lives
Gabe: except whn they pause
Gabe: to be incensed
Gabe: when someone calls them a fucking idiot
Kelly: Yeah, well
Kelly: Even when you know that being a fucking idiot is your livelihood
Kelly: It’s still probably a little rough to have Don Draper call you out personally in a magazine for being a fucking idiot
Kelly: And use you as an example for what is wrong with the world
Gabe: i guess
Gabe: i don’t know
Gabe: i would love for jon hamm to call me a fucking idiot
Kelly: Because you’d love to hear him say your name
Kelly: No matter what the context
Gabe: haha yeah
Kelly: Hahah
Kelly: gross

Kelly: I don’t know, I’m getting too deep into thinking about what the scenario would be if Kim Kardashian WERE aware that she is a fucking idiot and is what is wrong with the world
Kelly: Because I’m sure she is not
Kelly: And I’m sure she thinks she’s a successful businesswoman
Gabe: haha “the scenario”
Kelly: hahah like
Kelly: How she would respond
Kelly: To being called a fucking idiot
Gabe: i think you are giving way too much credit
Gabe: to kim kardashian
Gabe: that it would result in a SCENARIO
Gabe: it’s the Butterfly Effect
Gabe: but with Kim Kardashians’ self-awareness
Kelly: You don’t know that it wouldn’t!!!!!!!!!!!
Kelly: But yeah, who cares
Kelly: She’s a dummy billionaire
Gabe: anyway, so then last night did anything else happen in this fascinating War of Words?
Gabe: was there a new thing that happened? or nothing?
Kelly: The new thing that happened
Gabe: possibly something Jon Hamm said at an event?
Kelly: GABE
Kelly: The new thing that happened is that at a PaleyFest panel Jon Hamm responded to Kim Kardashian’s response to his “fucking idiot” statement
Kelly: Saying that it wasn’t personal and it was meant to be more on “pervasiveness of something in our culture”
Kelly: Oh gross why would you ever link me to that
Kelly: Just to SCARE ME?
Gabe: anyway, jon hamm’s “clarification” is funny
Kelly: Wait one sec
Kelly: I have a joke
Kelly: I guess that’s why they call it snaking the toilet!
Kelly: Ok you can talk now.
Gabe: that’s what you made me wait for?
Kelly: Yeah, I thought you liked jokes?
Gabe: i like jokes
Gabe: i do not like waiting
Kelly: sry
Kelly: and yw
Gabe: haha
Gabe: jon hamm’s “clarification” is funny
Gabe: because only if you thought someone was a ‘fucking idiot”
Gabe: would you claim that calling them one
Gabe: wasn’t personal
Gabe: and also say that it was their right to be bothered
Gabe: by the comment
Kelly: Haha, right
Kelly: It’s not personal, you’re just part of a larger fucking idiot problem
Gabe: i was simply using you as an example
Gabe: of the ways in which fucking idiots
Gabe: are ruining everything
Gabe: but i didn’t mean, like, YOU you
Gabe: it could have been any of a handful of fucking idiots
Kelly: You’re not really a fucking idiot in any distinct way
Kelly: sry 4 how u feel

Kelly: Oh well
Kelly: Jon Hamm broke another woman’s heart
Gabe: story of his life
Kelly: But at least the world is aware of how fucking idiots exist in it now.
Kelly: RIP idiocy
Gabe: word’s out

Comments (49)
  1. what kind of earring is that in Kim K’s money picture? or is it a Yeerk fleeing a sinking ship?

  2. Uff da. Whether Kim Kardashian is or is not, in fact, an actual fucking idiot seems almost beside the point. She (and many other reality stars or whatever across the gender spectrum, I am looking at your jersey shore dudes) certainly are not doing anything to raise the national discourse. I don’t even mean to say that everything SHOULD do so, or is somehow obligated to do so. Just, own your part in the dumbening!

    tl:dr – get off my lawn, E! whippersnappers

  3. I really wish these two would kiss and make up, because then I could move these CafePress “Kardashamm” t-shirts I regrettably made when I misread the news a couple days ago.

  4. This is sort of unrelated, but have you guys been watching The Times and Life of Tim? It’s sort of the best, it features Nick Kroll as a costar, it was made by the guy who did the Budweiser lizards campaign and I’m just surprised more people don’t talk about it more. Maybe It’s because there are so many wacky animated tv shows nowadays, but i think this one stands out.

  5. So I guess we can cross Jon Hamm off the list of potenial writers of last week’s hate email to Gabe.

  6. She got Hammed!

  7. just the fact that this is news proves his point.


  8. Guys, there’s no question she’s an idiot, but that’s not why she’s famous. She’s famous because she has a sex tape and a world class rear end.

  9. I think the true victim in this whole debacle is that poor snake. They smell with their tongues, guys.

  10. I”m not trying to be a creepy misogynist internet commenter, but am I the only guy that thinks that her face is not good? Because every other site people lust after her and I don’t get it. I’ve seen minutes of that awful show, and she’s always coated in makeup and plastic surgery.


  12. He should have said “She’s the cure for the common fucking idiot”

  13. I’m sorry to be “that guy”, but was there a reason Jon Hamm chose to pick on Kardashian and Hilton in the first place? I mean, sure they’re idiots and we all think so, but did he just bring it up smack in the middle of an interview for no reason? I attempted a google search, but couldn’t find any context for the original comment. That seems really mean spirited and low… You or I could tell our friends that we think so and so is a “fucking idiot”, but that’s cool because nobody cares what we think anyway. When you’re Jon Hamm and you say something in an interview for a pretty major women’s magazine you have to know that it will be brought to the attention of the women you are discussing. It just strikes me as really pointless and uncouth to have mentioned it at all.

  14. Happy Pi Day, Everyone!

  15. Wait, I’m confused. Being a fucking idiot is bad now?

  16. Since we’re talking about John Hamm, does anyone know why he appears for 30 seconds at the end of The A-Team movie? My need to know increases each time I watch it.

  17. If I’ve learned anything in my life, it’s that snakes don’t just “slither” out of toilets.

  18. I totally get Gabe’s fascination with wanting Jon Hamm to say your name. I do that every night at about 11:30…

  19. Kim is just mad that Jon Hamm is famous for being pretty AND smart AND good at his job whereas she is famous for being pretty AND in a sex tape.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.