Well, the number is obvious. The movie is called Friday the 13th, no mystery there. And it opens on February 13th, so it actually delivers two pieces of information. OK. But let’s talk about HOW the number 13 is written. It looks hand drawn. Almost like fingerpaint, but in blood. Curious! Since this is a remake, we obviously already know something about the movie. Whether it sticks to the plot of the original, or if Hollywood has decided to throw in some unexpected twists, we can at least be sure of one thing:

That teenagers will be murdered by a homicidal maniac.

But then what does that say about the fingerpainting? Traditionally, homicidal summer camp maniacs prefer to murder their teenagers by SURPRISE. They tend not to sit around PAINTING CREEPY WARNINGS IN THEIR PREVIOUS VICTIMS’ BLOOD WITH THEIR FINGERS. So, then, what is the meaning of this? I offer the following interpretation:

According to the American Art Therapy Association, art therapy is based on the belief that the creative process of art is both healing and life-enhancing. Art therapists use the creative process and the issues that come up during art therapy to help their clients increase insight and judgment, cope better with stress, work through traumatic experiences, increase cognitive abilities, have better relationships with family and friends, and to just be able to enjoy the life-affirming pleasures of the creative experience.

(via Wikipedia)

Work through traumatic experiences? You mean like LOSING YOUR ONLY CHILD BECAUSE TWO CAMP COUNSELORS WERE BUSY HAVING SEX INSTEAD OF WATCHING THE CHILDREN WHO HAD BEEN LEFT IN THEIR CARE? I think we know what is going on here, and I sincerely hope that this creative outlet is helping Mrs. Voorhees with the unimaginable psychic pain of her tragic loss. Keep up the great work. A++. Coffee and donuts on the table in the back.

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Comments (8)
  1. excellent analysis !!
    and extra points for remembering Mrs. Voorhees.

    good-looking poster but you can’t think about it for too long because then it all comes tumbling down. and it’s a bit too Why So Serious.

  2. But if Mrs. Voorhees stuck to the art therapy we’d have less Kevin Bacon Counselors killed by being stabbed in the trachea from underneath a bed. Just sayin’

  3. I think that the ancient “bloody 13″ symbol has been around far longer than the Friday the 13th series. In fact, I just read in National Geographic today that archaeologists found a second Rosetta Stone in Egypt, allowing them to translate the previously mystifying Egyptian movie reviews. Turns out that the “bloody 13″ on this poster translates to “this movie sucked hard”. Who knew?

  4. If you squish the “1″ and the “3″ together what does it form?

    It forms the letter “B.”

    I just blew your mind, right?

  5. That or Barry’s going to have one hell of a Bar Mitzvah

  6. AL B  |   Posted on Jan 23rd, 2009

    I bet this movie will be of a AvP quality. AvPR even…..

  7. On the Imdb page (http://imdb.com/title/tt0758746), someone’s credited for playing Jason Voorhees, so – since he doesn’t appear in the original – it’s obvious this movie will suck.

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