Dear Women,

Please don’t take offense to what I’m about to say. As a women myself, I understand the desire to not have any interests, goals, or hobbies. Once you have a man in your life there’s always the temptation to think, “I’m finished.” “Whaaaat am I supposed to do now?” “Hmm.” “Is it time to eat a meal?” “Well oook, I guess I’ll…?” But there comes a time in every woman’s life when she has to realize that her man will eventually divorce her if she doesn’t get some interests outside of her interest in him. That’s just life. The variable is whether you find this out before, during, or after your marriage. I know this sounds scary, and trust me, it is! Not all of us are a career gal deep down. But that doesn’t mean we can’t have dinner with other women sometimes, and it CERTAINLY doesn’t mean we can’t order a wine spritzer with our salad, if that’s what we want. It’s not as hard as it seems! Please, let’s watch this explanatory video together, and remember — men are just desserts.

Love,

Kelly

You see? Don’t be discouraged by your father who doesn’t think you should be left alone with a computer, lest ALL the data be lost. And DO be encouraged by your boyfriend who refuses to be your dessert until you fill up that empty brain with some hobbies. Having your own life is rewarding, and please remember — If you don’t gather together some semblance of a life for yourself now, you aren’t going to have anything to occupy your time with once he moves on. (Via EverythingIsTerrible.)

PS: Where I’m from, they call her next video A Hoagie Is More Than Just A Sandwich.

Comments (64)
  1. It’s true! I couldn’t keep a man until I branched out into competitive beekeeping. Now I have to keep ‘em away with a stick! Literally. I call the stick ‘Ole Mancrusher. I’m actually a fugitive in seven states!

  2. But if women have outside hobbies, how are we supposed to be able to control what they can and can’t do? Use your noodle, Kelly.

  3. Haha, they don’t realize that dessert is the best part of the meal.

  4. Men are Just Dessérts? Thisismynightmare! #monsterconvo

    • I (Ka)JUST (X & Chain)SAW what you did there.

    • If men are Just Desserts, then call me da cake eatur!

    • This thread is some Topknot stuff. I’m totally serious. In fact, if I can be Frank for a moment, I think if we could all just accept that every word in this thread Werttrew, I could live my life with less people Ian in my face and Lloyd about me being Wrong all the time. I might even be able to Feelgood without the Dr being involved. I mean, just once I would like to make it through the afternoon without being forced to take 10 whiskey sHotspur lunch hour. I wouldn’t spend my life in an office feeling like R2D2, forced to be esquire to C3PO as if he were some kindof knight in shining armor. Sorry, I don’t want to sound like That One Explainer Guy that just doesn’t know when to stop trying, but sometimes I think I would be happier if some kindof Raptor Jesus Chris Trashed this place. You might think I’m talking out of my Badideajeans right now, but I’m just trying to bring up some Freshie ideas that don’t involve DJs, possums, or waffles for a change.

      Also. About this thread. Itsahotdog. So, stick that in your Facetaco.

      I’m just Zayin…

  5. At what point as a society did we stop pronouncing Barbara as Baaawbawa?

  6. German Chocolate Jake #boyfrienddesserts

  7. if “outside interests” means wine spritzers, salads, and shitty secretarial jobs, that’s still a piss poor life and mighty depressing.

  8. Its no fun taking away a womens many interest and caging them with marriage if they dont even have any!

  9. The original 3D: Death, Desertion, and Divorce.

  10. What if my hobby is eating human flesh? WHAT THEN?

  11. Kudos to the producers for getting their timing right!! I mean, getting Mitt Romney to dub his voice over that old guy at the :45 second mark? Brilliant!

  12. It’s still okay for us men to be empty husks, though, right? I can still live my entire emotional and intellectual life vicariously through my wife, right?

  13. Those ladies are cooking their delicious desserts in a weird looking kitchen.

  14. Thanks, a lot Kelly. It’s women like you that keep the rest of us from landing a husband.

  15. this is just good advice. don’t define yourself through a man. Thanks, 1980s!

  16. This video is kind of amazing in its perfect simultaneity of sexism and empowerment.

    • That’s exactly what I was feeling. The message is: “Women, go be yourself, because that’s what men want you to be. Once you have found fulfillment somewhere other than in a man, then you can come back and find fulfillment in a man.”

  17. Boyfriends are apps, husbands are zerts. I call wives wifis.

  18. I was guessing this video came out in 1978-1981 but I looked up the books she mentions and they were published in 1985 and ’87. She had one called “Men Are Just Desserts” in 1994. I am old enough that I can remember all of those years. I don’t remember them being this grim — but I guess they were? Have I arrived here from a backward and alien land?

  19. women be shoppin

  20. http://lnk.co/IHWAS buy3buy

    A good business and sghopping way ,you can earn many money from here

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