Looking good, everybody. Looking great. Good haircuts. Good eyeliner. Very exciting sexual chemistry in the foyer of a Springfield, Missouri hair salon. “Do we just fuck right here, Ty Barnes?” “Yeah, let me just, hold on, yeah, perfect. Go for it.” Hey, did you do something different with your hair? Yeah, I entered into a pansexual nightmare in the foyer of a Springfield, Missouri hair salon. Oh, cool, well, you look great. Thanks, do you have the number for the hospital? Yes, it’s 9-1-1. (Thanks for the tip, werttrew.)

Comments (25)
  1. So that’s what Stone Cold Steve Austin has been up to recently.

  2. That’s not my hair salon!

    That’s my sanctuary.

  3. “What do you think would be a good addition to this commercial to show how serious we are about hair care?”

    “More eyeliner? More crazy transitions? Awkward staring?”

    “Whatever, just throw it all in there and slap some drum n’ bass over the whole thing. It’ll be a masterpiece.”

  4. This video somehow got hairspray in my eyes.

  5. Isn’t Werrtrew from Springfield? Which one are you? (note – still trying to decide if the younger man + woman are actually the same person, which would be fun.)

  6. I feel dirty just having had that kiss blown to me through the computer screen.

  7. Something tells me they called their salon Blow to be provocative. Blow drying makes up, like, maybe a 10th of the overall hair cutting/styling process.

  8. Would you go to a mechanic who doesn’t own a car? How about a tailor who never wears a suit? No? So why would you go to a salon owned by a guy with no hair?

    • tight goat. that’s why.

    • ???????????

      Presumably he used to have hair. And I don’t think hair stylists practice on themselves?

      I do, however, have a rule about goatees. The rule is no one can have them if they are going to touch me.

  9. I honestly did not know that Springfield, MO had this particular variety of person. It’s like finding out that there’s a hippie enclave in Staten Island.

    • Yeah, I think of most people there as looking more like this:

    • Strangely, about 75% of Missouri hair salons are like this. Some mix in a bit more 1990s big bangs, rat tails, and mullets, but overall this commercial doesn’t surprise me in the least. The make-up. The awkward sexuality. The aggressive hair that nobody would EVER come in and request. Yup. Everywhere in Missouri.

  10. Meh, I’ll just keep going to I Be-weave.


  11. Mods, please change my name to “Pansexual Nightmare”, thanks in advance.

  12. Oh God, will someone please get this video back up.

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