Just when America really needed it. When we were all coming down from the high that Ryan Gosling breaking up that fight in New York left us on for so many months, in steps a new Hollywood hero to break up a fight between homeless people while he is shopping near his home in LA. HE. IS. SOMEONE-WHO-PLAYS-BATMAN-IN-MOVIES-AND-ALSO-MAYBE-STOPPED-A-FIGHT-BETWEEN-HOMELESS-PEOPLE-IN-REAL-LIFE-IT’S-TOUGH-TO-SAY-BECAUSE-THE-INFO-IS-COMING-FROM-THE-NATIONAL-ENQUIRER! From Contact Music:

An eyewitness tells the National Enquirer, “I could not believe what I was seeing. It wasn’t clear what the people were arguing about – but it soon became apparent that their conversation was heading toward a violent incident.

“One of the homeless guys cocked back his fist and was just about to strike the other man – but out of nowhere Christian Bale appeared and got in the middle of them! Christian acted like a referee and told the homeless men to take it elsewhere – and away from all the families that were enjoying the peaceful surroundings.”

OUR HERO! Although it certainly doesn’t seem like he’s a great peace maker, as he basically just told homeless people go to fight somewhere where he and the other shoppers couldn’t see them, he CERTAINLY probably stood in between them to say it! Christian Bale: Bum Shoo-er. SHOO! Not to speak for everyone, but we all agree that this makes up for everything. Thank you, Christian Bale, for keeping our world safe. The Dark Knight Rises hits theaters on July 20. (Via ONTD.)

Comments (30)
  1. All this needs is a little Prince music and we can shut down, it’s over.

  2. Fucking amateurs.

  3. The director of Bale’s new movie, The Flowers of War’ also directed the Jet Li film ‘Hero.’

    SO obviously this is just viral marketing for ‘The Flowers of War.’

    Christian Bale STARTS fights. DUH

    (Sidenote, being a huge Empire of the Sun fan ever since 8th grade, seeing trailers for The Flowers fo War brings back weird nostalgia sense memory of me going, “I’ve seen that man as a boy in China in WW2 before…”).

    • Agreed, Christian Bale starts fights, he doesn’t stop them. This had to have been someone else, Christian Bale would have pulled out some gun kata and taken down everybody around him.

      • You HAD to bring up gun kata! Good GRIEF. my favorite part of that film is SPOILER after he slices off Taye Diggs’ face and it cuts to a birds-eye pov of Bale standing over all the carnage in the office, and you can see a CLEARLY POHOTSHOPPED IN Taye Diggs face laying on the ground. It’s so funny.

        Someone needs to find that image and do some ENHANCE shit to it.

  4. “Christian acted like a referee”

  5. There’s only one man fit to be defended by Christian Bale, and that man is McG.

  6. Passersby heard the following being said to the homeless men at the scene:

    “What the fuck is it with you two? What don’t you FUCKING understand? You got any fucking idea about, hey, it’s FUCKING distracting having homeless nobodies walking up behind us in the middle of the fucking lunch hour? Give me a fucking answer! What don’t you get about it?”

  7. I heard he put on 40 lbs to stop this fight.

    • I am embarassed that it took me so long to get this, but judging by the lack of downvotes, I’m not alone. I didn’t realize it until I went looking for another picture of that scene, then I found it and was all “wait a second, I think someone has made this joke already!”

  8. He freaked out the homeless guy by speaking in his batman voice the whole time, also he was dressed as batman

  9. As always, the bigger question: WWMMHD? (What would Marky Mark Hypothetically do?)

    • I would stop homelessness in America if I saw a homeless person on the street

    • Did you see his follow-up apology? Where he blamed the journalist for asking about 9/11 in the first place, and Marky Mark also said a very similar thing in an interview 6 years ago, and said that he’s had at least 50 dreams about stopping 9/11?!

  10. “The Ryan Gosling of Batmans” lol. Clearly it should be Batmens. Or Batsmen.

    • How about you drop the sexist language and call them Batpeople?

      • P.S. Hi Kate! Did you ever make those cookies I gave you the recipe for?

        • Not yet! But I can’t wait! I’m doing penance for my poor holiday diet these days. It’ll wear off soon. Then, FT’s cookies!

          • KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE! You just gave me the greatest idea I have ever had today! You remember how my cookies were amazing because they had MORE COOKIES INSIDE? But they were Oreos because Oreos are delicious and accessible? Well I don’t know about your neck of the woods, but here in Michigan, we are only 1 day, 10 hours, 5 minutes, and 54 seconds away from the greatest of all holidays, Girl Scout Cookie Season. I AM MAKING COOKIES WITH GIRL SCOUT COOKIES INSIDE!

          • That is a fantastic idea. Omg, maybe the thin mints inside of a chocolate/chocolate chip cookie?

          • GONNA DO THAT. Also Tagalongs inside of a peanut butter cookie.

  11. The real Batman would save it for henchmen.

  12. “Christian acted like a referee and told the homeless men to take it elsewhere.”

    the homeless man responded with a quick declaration that Mr. Bale “get the fuck out of [his] bathroom.”

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