Well, that pizza party we had last night sure was a success! My goodness! Did you guys get home all right? You doing ok today? Good, that’s great. Sooo that was a pretty boring awards show, right? Hahah. WOW! You certainly surrender a good amount of your hope to be entertained during the next THREE HOURS when you put on an awards show, we all know that, we’re all the same kind of cynical adult, but wow that was relentlessly boring! Ricky Gervais’s jokes were all fairly tame, when they weren’t just normal Hollywood Flattering. The presenters were all stiff and weird and dull, as if it isn’t their everyday job to be entertaining. Basically there were three notable things that happened. First, this. Second, when George Clooney had Meryl Streep’s glasses and then handed them off and nobody knew what to do with them at all. Hahahah. “Uhhh, has anyone not gotten the glasses yet? Does anyone still need to see the glasses? No? Nobody? How about on the other side of the– Oh, no? Everybody’s gotten them?” Hahah. Very good. Very good part. The third notable thing was when The Artist won for best comedy and then THERE WAS A DOG ONSTAGE!!! If only everyone in the room could’ve been a dog. That’s the dream. And, yeah, everything else was just straight-up dumb. Oh, except for when Joey won. I CAN’T believe he never won for Friends and I can’t believe he was nominated for Joey, but this certainly kind of makes up for both of those things. Good job, Joey! I bet your family is very proud. So please check out the truly memorable photo gallery above, and the full list of winners with, I’m sure, very proud families after the jump.


FILM

Best Picture, Drama: The Descendants
Best Picture, Musical or Comedy: The Artist
Best Actor, Drama: George Clooney, The Descendants
Best Actress, Drama: Meryl Streep, The Iron Lady
Best Actor, Musical or Comedy: Jean Dujardin, The Artist
Best Director: Martin Scorsese, Hugo
Best Actress, Musical or Comedy: Michelle Williams, My Week With Marilyn
Best Supporting Actor: Christopher Plummer, Beginners
Best Supporting Actress: Octavia Spencer, The Help
Best Foreign Language Film: A Separation
Best Animated Film: The Adventures of Tintin
Best Screenplay: Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris
Best Original Score: Ludovic Bource, The Artist
Best Original Song: “Masterpiece” (music and lyrics by Madonna, Julie Frost, Jimmy Harry), W.E.

TELEVISION

Best Series, Drama: Homeland
Best Series, Musical or Comedy: Modern Family
Best Actor, Drama: Kelsey Grammer, Boss
Best Actress, Drama: Claire Danes, Homeland
Best Actress, Musical or Comedy: Laura Dern, Enlightened
Best Actor, Musical or Comedy: Matt LeBlanc, Episodes
Best Miniseries or Movie: Downton Abbey (Masterpiece)
Best Actress, Miniseries or Movie: Kate Winslet, Mildred Pierce
Best Actor, Miniseries or Movie: Idris Elba, Luther
Best Supporting Actress, Series, Miniseries or Movie: Jessica Lange, American Horror Story
Best Supporting Actor, Series, Miniseries or Movie: Peter Dinklage, Game of Thrones

Comments (35)
  1. I didn’t see much of the show, but according to Twitter there was something about someone who had a stroke and now Baby Friday murdered Gabe? Crazy night. Go Giants.

  2. My favorite part was when Michelle Williams was giving her sweet acceptance speech and they cut to a shot of Evan Rachel Wood texting.

  3. I’m with Madonna

    • Seriously, “Like A Virgin… hurr hurr” was the ABSOLUTE low point for me. I was like, infuriated by it?

      So, I just had to Paint my feelings

      • I can’t wait for that Entertainment Weekly article where Ricky Gervais gets the chance to explain exactly what he meant with that “Like a Virgin” joke.

        For the most part his jokes were only offensive in that they were offensively unfunny. But maybe that was the whole gag. Irony like. But even if that was the case it didn’t work either. It was just a bad idea to have him host again. The whole idea had bomb written all over it and bombed he did. I had to watch some Louis C.K. standup on Netflix to get the taste out of my mouth. That worked. Louis C.K. is really very good at what he does.

  4. I missed it. What was this year’s “Brendan Fraser hand clap”?

  5. I’m calling 2012 an * year like they do in baseball because Breaking Bad wasn’t nominated for anything. Just saying.

    • Teeth face was robbed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • nominated or won? could have sworn I saw Bryan cranston there so there must have been a nomination right?

    • I know the reason it wasn’t nominated for any Emmys this year is that it aired in the summer or something arbitrary like that and so it wasn’t eligible. So that could be why it wasn’t nominated here either.

      Or it could be because this is the same award show that once honored “Avatar” with Best Picture.

  6. Between the Packers-Giants game and the Golden Globes, I watched about 20 minutes of content and 7 hours of commercials yesterday. So many commercials. So I don’t remember anything about the show, but I do want to buy that phone that posts things instantly as they happen.

  7. Hollywood Foreign Press: Rewarding 1990′s stars like Kelsey Grammer and Matt LeBlanc now for some reason.

  8. I can’t believe we have to wait a whole ‘nother year now.

  9. I think we can all agree that there was not nearly enough Swinton. I am 95% sure that whatever she was doing during the awards was a billion times more interesting than the telecast. Especially if she was having a dance off with David Bowie, as I choose to believe.

  10. I would almost rather watch football than awards ceremonies. What kind of gay man am I?

  11. Wait, hang on, what? Joey? Is this 2004? I’m confused.

  12. So, is Ides of March any good?

  13. missed the awards show because i was watching the season finale of Sherlock and simultaneously crying and yelling “Moffat!”

  14. We called it last night but it is worth repeating — drunk Helen Mirren should host everything.

  15. WHAT? I was told TinTin is the worst and not to go see it? was I told wrong? or are these awards meaningless?

  16. I thought Ricky was good. Funnier and more down to earth than he has been. As was pointed out, the Madonna Like a Virgin joke was terrible but not as terrible as Madonna’s self congratulatory acceptance speech that followed.

    On another note, there seems to be an unwritten rule that when women win awards at these things they need to appear surprised and overwhelmed. I’m sure they are both surprised and excited, to a degree, but they play it up and exaggerate it to the point that it looks fake. Nothing like the confidence of an acting award to make you think you can fool a room full of your peers. Meryl Streep, on the other hand, had to have known she was walking home with that award the other night (since she was incredible as usual and it’s that sort of role) and looked genuinely surprised and a little overwhelmed. Just another example of how brilliant of an actor she is.

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