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Here we are, everyone. The night of the 2012 Golden Globes, hosted by Ricky Gervais. OH, WHAT A NIGHT! Remember last year when the thought that Ricky Gervais was hosting the Golden Globes was actually an exciting thing that maybe could’ve made the event a whole lot more bearable? Weird! Now look where we are! What a difference a year makes, especially when you are a jerk who is constantly given platforms to never shut up about it. Oh well. We’re still going to enjoy our night, RIGHT?! Watching the Golden Globes together?! Something we and the Hollywood stars dream about all year long?! LIKE THE FAMILY WE ARE? YES! So please, first, refresh your memory on the nominees and remember that every time Bridesmaids doesn’t win, a woman is made to feel less-than by a man. And second, please join me and each other in the comments for some Golden Globes HANG TIME! I hope you have your fancy clothes on! LET’S GET THIS IMPORTANT HOLLYWOOD AWARD CEREMONY PARTY STARTED!
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It’s crazy that during a three-hour long awards show, watching celebrities win awards continues to stay super fresh.
i never watch these things. So I am going to ask a NOOB question, Has there been anyone who just keeps talking even if the music is playing and lights go out or whatever they do? Will they get pushed off the stage or what happens. p.s. I am fine with being an award show noob.
I will watch the hell out of Smash, such is my love of Anjelica Huston.
I was just having that conversation!
THIRD PAGE YOU GUYS ! ! ! !
WE’RE REALLY DOING IT!!!!!!!!
If we really try we can make 4 pages!
REALLY harping on the poop stuff tonight.
Getting pretty tired of the Bridesmaids references that deal exclusively in pooping and making fun of women’s advancement.
“What? That is my lesbian sex dream!” — @babyfriday
T-Fey and J-Ly!
hat!
High five for a penis joke. That was legit funny. I thought women couldn’t do comedy… so confused.
Matt Lablanc Joey
Ahhh he did get nominated for joey…..I am sorry.
JOOOOEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
Just so you all know, I am making a Swinton sock puppet in protest of the Swintonlessness of the evening so far.
I’m not allowed to talk about how I’m fixing my Fassbender frustration.
I really like salt n pepper Joey. How you doin?!
WTF. Best part of Matt LeBlanc being there has to be all the Stephen Mangan we get to look at.
Matt LeBlanc not starting his speech with “How YOU doin’?” A rare miss, Matt LeBlanc.
Let’s get Chandler up here, WHERE IS HE
he couldn’t be here because he’s filming another PSA for drug courts with Fred Durst !!!
Could he BE filming another….you know what, never mind.
“Bridesmaids has proven that women can poop.” -Hollywood, totally getting it
Horrible facial hair award goes to…
JOEY’S NERVOUS :-{
Is Bradley Cooper the new Bond villain?
Bradley Cooper looks like a ratface with a permanent Guy Fawkes mask.
Chris Rock approved.
George Clooney + Morgan Freeman + Dame Judy Dench = AHHHHHHHHHH!
Alright everyone name your favorite Morgan Freeman’s voice-over
Allstate commercial
No March of the Penguins?
Tina Fey is on a rampage!
I can’t stop watching this!
Reese Witherspoon looks like a beautiful scarlet mermaid!
And an ELECTION shout-out!!
Guys, did someone kidnap Ricky?
brent’s favorite actor
I thought Sidney Poitier would be at least 20 years older than this.
THEY call him Mr Tibbs but I call him Mr. Slow Talker!
How did they know when he is finished?
I love Helen Mirren. LOVE HER.
Drunk Helen Mirren should host the rest of the night.
Drunk Helen Mirren should host next year and do all the jokes off-the-cuff. That girl is bawdy and fearless.
Drunk Helen Mirren should do everything. She is the best.
I met drunk Helen Mirren at the Emmys in 2007 and she showed us her lucky lucite stripper heels that she bought at a drag queen store on Hollywood Boulevard!! She really honestly is the best.
The Bucket List… C’mon, show The Bucket List.
WHAT’S IN THE BOX???
UNFORGIVEN IS 20 YEARS OLD? BOOO time. Boo.
ELECTRIC COMPANY!!!!!
WHATEVER THE MORGAN FREEMAN NAKED CASKET SCENE MOVIE WAS FOR BEST MOVIE!
CAUGHT YOU NOT CLAPPING, DICAPRIO! more like DI-NOCLAP-RIO!
He looked sad.
This comment forever, Cake! #SEBFEC
Brad Pitt has the Dorian Gray disease
He’s trying to beat Sidney for slowest talker, damn.
Let’s see that clip of Morgan Freeman in the bath as a vampire again
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp0-yDJAtWQ
#crying
Who was the hooker on the bald guy?
Morgan Freeman is just sooooooooooooooo Morgan Freeman-ish. Which is to say, awesome.
ben kingsley is such a player
Morgan Freeman is great. Most of the movies he acted in, not so much.
Whoa skeleton arms.
my favorite award show troupe is starting out an introduction to an award by just sayin a bunch of names
Someone get Angie a steak, please!
Good Lord, Angelina looks like the Face of Death.
Wow. Eat. A. Sandwich.
Madonna’s gonna take the stage no matter who wins for best director, isn’t she?
Does Scorsese dye his eyebrows black?
This is a valid question.
HOLD UP. did this 400 YEAR OLD MAN just say he has a 12 year old daughter??
that is irresponsible procreation.
Dammit, I thought we gave Ricky the slip.
Uh oh. Gevais did something naughty.
Antonio just told you, Ricky!
Alternate joke: Ricky…You have some ‘splainin’ to do!
What no 2 broke girls?
no walking dead?
Julie Bowen, you are a jerk. Her meanness is too real.
YAY lets clap, she can speak spanish.
The Modern Family writing staff works so hard on their “Award Acceptance Bits” binder for the cast.
The Golden Globes are just so fun for the announcer too.
how is this an entire thread already and nobody’s mentioned jason sudeikis’ ricky gervais from last night? it was perfect and even though i’m not watching i assume it continues to be perfect in light of new information.
next: GG for actually funny comedy, nominees: Louis, Archer,Community, Bob’s Burgers
I still say it should have been about horse Rambo! I will say that forever!
Jessica Biel has a third tit?
RYAN GOSLING WAS ROBBED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh no Jessica Biel got double dressed in an old lady’s fabric nightmare
Wherever he is, this is his reaction:
Where is he? Where is my boyfriend? I am so confused!!
I just assumed that Michael Fassbender and Ryan Gosling were having a slumber party. I bet they are crank calling Ryan Reynolds riiiight now.
Ok, I’ll come clean. I kidnapped Fassy. He’s in the basement. No clue on Gosling’s whereabouts.
Oh that was sweet, he jigged and jagged.
SWINTON! There was a splash of Swinton! I am appeased.
SWWWWWWWWWWWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINTON
That is some fierce Swinton. Goodness.
416th!!!
Seriously,thoughh, just finished watching Downton Abbey and noticed the Globes were on and wondered if Vidoegum was doing something. Always late to the party, i guess.
YA BURNT, RICKY GERVAIS.
– Colin Firth
I love you Meryl, but are you really that surprised? C’mon! You’re like the best, of course you were going to win!
I can’t joke. I am a serious actress
I think most of us have stopped watching. It’s just too long.
When isn’t the winner Meryl Streep?
Act like you’ve been there before, Meryl.
That bird metaphor got a little weird at the end.
Cute chuckle/snort.
Piper Perabo didn’t like the the Artist I guess.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Holy shit they brought the dog. Awards over.
A DOGGIE!
I wish everybody at this thing was a dog.
Westminster dog show is next month. WDS pizza party?
If this isn’t highest-rated comment of the week, I’m going to hunt down each every one of you for sport.
I would laugh at everyone going nuts over the dog, but damned if I didn’t shout “PUPPY” too.
I’m going to need to find my Jane Fonda workout VHS.
The shot of her back… RIGHT?!
The actor from The Artist should be hosting with that dog. NOW THAT WOULD BE AMAZING!
Fassy, BadIdeaJeans!
I was pausing it and rewinding and playing again in slow motion. I’M NOT MAKING A JOKE. THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. THREE TIMES.
FASSBENDER WAS THERE THE ENTIRE TIME? WHY NOT MORE FASSBENDER!
The golden globes needs a spinoff where Swinton and Fassbender drive around smoking cigarettes and solving crimes. Of course, James McAvoy will be there because this is my fantasy show.
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RYAN WAS ROBBED TWICE!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is it right? This is the prank!!!
Penis Joke and Golf Joke….. Shaft and Balls
Casual Prank. Referencing Fassbender’s “5 iron”.
and george clooney’s dick joke concludes the 69th annual golden globes! goodnight everybody!
So even George Clooney wants to fuck my boyfriend? Allowed.
Harisson Ford doesnt care for cutesy introductions
YOU GUYS WE HAVE TO GET TO FOUR PAGES.