A friend of mine has a joke he says after he sees a movie, and that joke is to say to the person he’s with — “So, what do you think happens next?” Hahah. It’s not like a joke you’d see a comedian tell on stage at the LaughHouse, for sure, but you get it. It’s just annoying? I’m sure you understand. You’re LOLing. Anyway, soooo…What do you think happens after Ryan Gosling drives away at the end of Drive??? Gets married and settles down, probably? Well, if you know how to read you can soon have an answer! James Sallis, author of Drive and recent include-ee in NYT‘s Best Crime Novels of 2011, has or is currently writing a sequel to the novel-now-film. From SlashFilm:

I don’t know that I’d put much money on this ever becoming a film, but if you were enough of a fan of Nicolas Winding Refn‘s film Drive that you have to find out what might happen to the main character at some point in the future, a novel scheduled for April release will deliver the info. … We don’t have a huge plot synopsis, but there is this: “Six years later – Phoenix. Out of nowhere someone wants Driver dead. Who? Why? Big mistake…”

WHOA! Admittedly, I did not read Drive. I did see the movie though, of course, and the movie was great. I’m not sure that I would ever be on board with a sequel to the movie, because for some reason movies seem more precious than novels and even though if I had to pick I would choose books over movies any day, the idea of a sequel to a good movie makes me worried whereas the sequel to a good book makes me totally normal. I guess because there’s a lot more room for error in a movie and with a book it’s just the author and they probably know what they’re doing. FIGURED IT OUT! Ugh. I don’t even know what I was trying to talk about. OH! I was trying to say that I am on board with the sequel to the novel. Maybe we can all read it together when it comes out? And we can talk about how/if you think the existence of the movie Drive influenced the writing and the story of the sequel? OMGGG I can hardly wait. BUT, because the sequel takes place six years later, I’ve written a brief interstitial to bridge the gap. It’s good.

Chapter One

Driver drove away in his car, bleeding A LOT from his stomach wound. “How is he even staying conscious,” one might wonder. Oops. One was correct to wonder that because he just passed out and his vehicle is slowing to a stop on a long stretch of road. Uhoh. Is someone going to find him before he dies from blood loss? Yes. After about 4.5 minutes another car drives down the road and stops beside Driver’s. “OH MY GOD ARE YOU OK?” they ask, but they aren’t really expecting an answer because clearly he is NOT ok. They call 911 and an ambulance comes and picks up Driver.

“You don’t have any info on you, we need to know your name,” says the EMT person in the ambulance. Ryan Gosling Driver just looks up at him and says nothing. “Ooook, well, we’re going to have to get this info at some point because you are going to have to pay a lot of money for this ambulance and the emergency room stuff.”

Driver wakes up in the hospital and is surrounded by beautiful nurses, all coo-ing over him and holding different things, like balloons and stuffed animals. “Oh, look who’s awake!” one says. Driver says nothing for a while but then asks for a glass of water. Each of them gets him a glass of water and now he has seven glasses of water. He gives a slight smile.

Chapter Two

“Goodbye, ladies,” says Driver as he drives away from the hospital. He hasn’t paid his bill yet but gave them his word that he would someday, and he definitely will, and one of the nurses picked up his car for him. Where is he going? Phoenix, probably. Hopefully no one will ever want him dead there, because he plans to stay there for at least seven years.

To Be Continued…

Great! What an important waste of no one’s time. Now we’re all ready for the sequel! I’ll see you in April, and also every day until then.

Comments (22)
  1. I usually have a soft spot for sequels. I contribute this to the same irrational impulse that makes me love cover songs always and forever. But the more I like a movie, the less I want to see a sequel. Like, I will DEFINITELY be watching the new American Pie movie as soon as it is humanly possible to do so, but if they ever try to FILM a Drive sequel, I will probably light myself on fire in protest.

  2. Glad this sequel finally showed the importance of ambulences bringing people to hospitals.

  3. Your friend’s joke at the end of movies reminds me of my joke I always make at the beginning of movies: right as the title sequence credit starts up I go, “This sucks, I’m done.” Ha ha ha. I usually say this alone in the dark.

  4. this is a good segue into the sequel! what does he do in phoenix? i’m pretty sure he should get a job at burger king and start taking spanish lessons at the learning annex. there can be a lady involved too, sure. and why not drive? he should drive. to awesome places like austin (for sxsw) and maybe he should drive to tijuana for tequila and maybe to minnesota to visit the cohen brothers? and he probably gets his jacket dry cleaned as well.

  5. If this happens, I am definitely suing for Driven not being like the Sylvester Stallone movie Driven.

  6. The soundtrack should be nothing but Drivin’ ‘N’ Cryin’ songs

  7. I have to see Drive so I can get these jokes. I wonder if it’s on demand yet.

  8. Needs more anti-semitism

  9. I believe the person that wants Driver dead is Driver 2. He was the hottest of hotshot drivers in all of Arizona until Driver showed up, and now Driver 2 is out for motor oil blood. On top of that, apparently Driver 2′s father was killed in car accident caused by Driver. So now it’s personal. Get ready to rev your engines, because you’re about to see Ryan GoSLOWing and Michael FASTbender stare at each other not-so-menacingly in DRIVER 2: DRIVEN TO DRIVE!

  10. They (“Who are ‘they?’” – Elizabethtown) need to make this sequel into a movie so that they can film it in Phoenix because I LIVE IN PHOENIX and I could find/marry Ryan Gosling. Right now, the only thing that is stopping us from getting married is that I have not found him yet. The only thing.

  11. “Six years later – Phoenix. Out of nowhere someone wants Driver dead. Who? Why? Big mistake…”

    Compelling.

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